I'll try. I'll certainly treat this as a genuine question vs a contrarian slap. LOL.
You say both of your children have significant RAD - which you define as obvious and chronic problems in virtually all relationships - and yet both of your children are each doing amazingly well in both their business and personal relationships...
They appear to be managing their work relationships tolerably well--at least above average for those with significant RAD. They appear to be managing their marriages less well--particularly in the case of my daughter. And my son is gone a LOT of the time traveling for business. Yet, his marriage does appear reasonably solid. There are things that are less than ideal from my perspective--and evidence of RAD. Yet, they are above average for those with significant RAD.
Are your children simply outside of the norm for the population and the disorder that your theory is attempting to explain or are there other causes for this affliction?
I think they are above average for those afflicted with significant RAD in several respects that are difficult to articulate well. In others, they seem to be somewhat average for those afflicted with significant RAD.
They still relate to me more awkwardly than I would like, by far. And, to me, their relationship dynamics with me reflect more the historic RAD carp in the rearing years vs the overwhelmingly healthier ways I've related to them as an adult.
I always tried to respect their individuality and need for space and privacy. However, I know just my way of being in the world those years was a lot dysfunctional and emotionally intense in less than constructive, relaxed, confident ways.
Nevertheless, they knew and would say so now, that they always knew growing up that I'd move heaven and earth in their behalf if I saw the need to do so.
So, it's a mixed bag. In some respects, they are typical relatively high achievers with a lot of the RAD fostered compulsiveness encouraging that to buttress their sense of self worth etc. etc. etc. In other respects, they are still wrestling with intimacy issues, independence issues, connectedness issues, vulnerability issues--the stuff Brene Brown's research is smack in the middle of.
If I've failed to give you the sort of answer you were looking for, please let me know and I'll try again. Cheers.