I don’t understand the spending, either.
One study said that the success of a marriage correlates positively with the number of guests at the wedding. However, this is unconnected with costs. You can have 500 people (say, most of your church congregation) at a wedding that costs $500.
The nicest wedding I’ve attended have been put together on a shoestring.
That might work in your neck of the woods. Boy, it would not even come close where I am.
The kids had a mass, and a reception.
The ONLY thing they splurged on was the photographer. (That was because I was a photographer for so long and we are a tight little community.)
The guest list was family, and very close friends. Still had 126 people on the list.
My daughter got her dress at a wedding store outlet. Last years dress, retailed at $2,500—she got it for $500 and had to pay for alterations.
No open bar. Two choices for dinner.
Really, compared to a lot of weddings I’ve seen over the past couple of years it was on the lower side of average—and it still blew mine out of the water (30 years ago tomorrow.)