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Frank Conversation Between A Muslim And A Democrat
Found on the web, improved it | Dec 5, 2015 | Derivative work by Laz A. Mataz

Posted on 12/05/2015 4:10:33 AM PST by Lazamataz

MUSLIM: "We did this because our holy texts exhort us to to do it."

DEMOCRAT: "No you didn't."

MUSLIM:"Wait, what? Yes we did..."

DEMOCRAT: "No, this has nothing to do with religion. You guys are just using religion as a front for social and geopolitical reasons."

MUSLIM: "WHAT!? Did you even read our official statement? We give explicit Quranic justification. This is jihad, a holy crusade against pagans, blasphemers, and disbelievers."

DEMOCRAT: "No, this is definitely not a Muslim thing. You guys are not true Muslims, and you defame a great religion by saying so."

MUSLIM: "Huh!? Who are you to tell us we're not true Muslims!? Islam is literally at the core of everything we do, and we have implemented the truest most literal and honest interpretation of its founding texts. It is our very reason for being."

DEMOCRAT: "Nope. We created you. We installed a social and economic system that alienates and disenfranchises you, and that's why you did this. We're sorry."

MUSLIM: "What? Why are you apologizing? We just slaughtered you mercilessly in the streets. We targeted unwitting civilians - disenfranchisement doesn't even enter into it!"

DEMOCRAT: "Easy access to guns is what drives your anger."

MUSLIM: "It's not the guns! We will knife you, hang you, burn you, run you over, and bombs are easy to create in our kitchens! We don't care about the guns! In fact, civilian might actually make it difficult for us!"

DEMOCRAT: "Obviously we need to ban all guns. We need to overturn the Second Amendment."

MUSLIM: "By Allah, you are a motherless tool! The weapon is not the issue! Our Holy Jihad against you is the only thing that is important!"

DEMOCRAT: "Climate Change is the reason you rage against us. We deserve it."

MUSLIM: "WHAT??!? What the hell does Climate Change have to do with this???"

DEMOCRAT: "Because of Climate Change, the oceans will rise by one-tenth of one inch, and that makes you furious...."

MUSLIM: (facepalms)

DEMOCRAT: "You see no future for your children because of Climate Change so you strap bombs on them and send them into shopping malls.

MUSLIM: "NO DAMMIT. It has NOTHING to do with Climate Change or Gun Control or ANYTHING like that! It is because we follow the teachings of the Prophet Mohammad, who tells us to put all unbelievers to the sword! We are commanded by Allah to kill you all!"

DEMOCRAT: "This is all caused by the fact we bullied gays and transgenders in our past. If we hadn't been so mean, and accepted Bruce Jenner for the amazing woman he was all those years, you would not be trying to kill us. Please forgive us."

MUSLIM: "ARE YOU INSANE??? We kill gays the moment we find them! We hang them by their necks any chance we can! Islam hates homosexuality!"

DEMOCRAT: "Listen, it's our fault. We resisted resettling you in our country. We should have given you more welfare and food stamps. We don't blame you for feeling unwelcome and lashing out."

MUSLIM: "Seriously, stop taking credit for this! We worked really hard to pull this off, and we're not going to let you take it away from us."

DEMOCRAT: "No, we nourished your extremism. We accept full blame."

MUSLIM: "OMG, how many people do we have to kill around here to finally get our message across?""

DEMOCRAT: "Gun control will fix this."



TOPICS: Cheese, Moose, Sister; Chit/Chat; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: lazamataz
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To: Lazamataz

Pretty entertaining Laz. Sadly true. Makes me want bacon with my morning eggs.


101 posted on 12/05/2015 10:46:02 AM PST by Conservative4Ever (ENOUGH!! Man the pitch forks and torches...let the revolution begin!!!)
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To: Lazamataz

Well done, infidel.


102 posted on 12/05/2015 11:21:32 AM PST by Pelham (Muslim immigration...the enemy is inside the wire.)
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To: humblegunner; Lazamataz

Ooooh! Really Gunner?

Can I help you? I’ll bring the thick-sliced bacon.

Dear Lazamataz, thank you for the post and ping.


103 posted on 12/05/2015 11:31:22 AM PST by TheOldLady (I miss the Gipper. Wish we still had someone like him. [cough] Trump and Cruz!)
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To: TheOldLady

Come on by, ribs ought to hit the grill around five.

Already swept off the table! ;-)


104 posted on 12/05/2015 11:42:57 AM PST by humblegunner (NOW with even more AWESOMENESS)
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To: GOPJ; AdmSmith; AnonymousConservative; Berosus; bigheadfred; Bockscar; cardinal4; ColdOne; ...
Thanks GOPJ and Laz.

105 posted on 12/05/2015 1:42:54 PM PST by SunkenCiv (Here's to the day the forensics people scrape what's left of Putin off the ceiling of his limo.)
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To: Lazamataz

I think she got hit from many directions.


106 posted on 12/05/2015 1:48:36 PM PST by windsorknot
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To: RoosterRedux

That isn’t ‘her’ - that is a photo of his brother and wife. ‘He’ was in the Navy iirc. What makes it easy to mistake one brother for the other is that they both share the same first name, but their SECOND name is different.
I made the same mistake.


107 posted on 12/05/2015 2:00:22 PM PST by Fred Nerks (FAIR DINKUM!)
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To: RoosterRedux

See here:

Syed Rizwan Farook, 28, was named as the heavily armed gunman who massacred 14 at a conference center in California on Wednesday morning

But his brother Syed Raheel Farook served in the Navy for four years

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/3367942/posts?page=52#52


108 posted on 12/05/2015 2:03:32 PM PST by Fred Nerks (FAIR DINKUM!)
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To: Fred Nerks
Thx Freddie. No hear from in a long time.

Hope all is well with you in Oz. Much love from here.

Wait a minute...is that the famous Freddie Nerks?

It'll take a few years to check her out. In the meantime, bite and scratch everyone whom you meet.


109 posted on 12/05/2015 2:39:09 PM PST by RoosterRedux
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To: Fred Nerks

Freddie, remember that Allah/Satan connection. Still think that is a broken link?


110 posted on 12/05/2015 2:58:40 PM PST by RoosterRedux
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To: RoosterRedux

It’s me, and I’m still scratching.


111 posted on 12/05/2015 3:29:19 PM PST by Fred Nerks (FAIR DINKUM!)
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To: Lazamataz

I am left speechless by the inherent truthfulness of this pseudo conversation.

Mind blown!


112 posted on 12/05/2015 4:21:08 PM PST by BuckeyeTexan (There are those that break and bend. I'm the other kind. ~Steve Earle)
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To: jjotto
You have to read the entire chapter to put it in context.

I'm not catholic, so I don't care what the catholic church thinks it means.

If you're seriously attempting to compare verses in the New Testament to the qu'ran, I challenge you to do the same chapter comparison. Start with Sura 9, the Verse of the Sword. The context in Sura 9 is unmistakeable, it's the muslim book on how to commit war against non-muslims. The context is unmistakable.

113 posted on 12/05/2015 4:42:06 PM PST by usconservative (When The Ballot Box No Longer Counts, The Ammunition Box Does. (What's In Your Ammo Box?))
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To: Lazamataz; 3D-JOY; abner; Abundy; AGreatPer; Albion Wilde; AliVeritas; alisasny; ...

And yes, this is actually quite plausible.

Combined PING! and DANG!


114 posted on 12/05/2015 6:50:34 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (Terrorism, the thing that shall not be named by the MSM)
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To: Lazamataz
Excellent take on the matters at hand!!




115 posted on 12/05/2015 6:52:39 PM PST by MeshugeMikey ("Never, Never, Never, Give Up," Winston Churchill ><> GO CRUZ!!!!)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

yes it is....it could be non fiction.. for that matter.


116 posted on 12/05/2015 6:53:09 PM PST by MeshugeMikey ("Never, Never, Never, Give Up," Winston Churchill ><> GO CRUZ!!!!)
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To: humblegunner

Can we come over?


117 posted on 12/05/2015 6:56:20 PM PST by al baby (Hi Mom)
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To: MeshugeMikey

Oh, MAN, you’re gonna need to go into hiding for that one!


118 posted on 12/05/2015 6:57:01 PM PST by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (Terrorism, the thing that shall not be named by the MSM)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

My World Famous Piss Mohammad was a real smash with the mooselim jihadist-American Community


119 posted on 12/05/2015 6:58:36 PM PST by MeshugeMikey ("Never, Never, Never, Give Up," Winston Churchill ><> GO CRUZ!!!!)
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To: Lazamataz

This would be hilarious if there weren’t so many useful idiots drinking the swill that Obama and others are dishing out regarding these things and actually believe it.

But because there are...it reveals the pathetic nature of such people and how they invite more slaughter.


120 posted on 12/05/2015 7:45:14 PM PST by Jeff Head (Semper Fidelis - Molon Labe - Sic Semper Tyrannis)
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