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To: Zeneta
Thank you very much for the kind words and constructive criticism. I'll address the points you made in order.

Extend the opening riff just a few seconds longer, make them wait for the next/first cut-in. (tease them)

Agreed.

The vocal track however comes in a little too strong, could be the volume, but given how your music tracks start and build I would like to hear your vocal track do the same. I would consider adding new lyrics on the front end to accommodate the transition.

Interesting. The vocal may well be a bit loud - I don't have monitor speakers, and mostly mix through headphones. (I try to compensate for their quirks, but don't always succeed.)

WRT lyrical build-up, I was seriously PO'ed when I wrote this song (you can guess why), and subtlety went out the window. It's definitely an idea if I decide to expand or re-record the song.

And the lastly, the chorus “Welcome to the crazy years” I would intermix an alternate line like, “Welcome to a world of fears” and or as the music builds “We are here for all your fears”.

Also a possibility. The chorus is repetitive because I was trying to pound that one idea home, but variation could also work. Again, I'll give it some thought.

I was indeed looking for feedback, and I appreciate your providing it.

52 posted on 06/30/2015 4:38:06 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (My music: http://hopalongginsberg.com/ | Facebook: Hopalong X Ginsberg | Instagram: hopalonginsberg)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Isn’t bad publicity good?

Who cares what teenagers say? We love you


53 posted on 06/30/2015 4:45:06 PM PDT by Gefn (We can't call people without wings angels, so we call them friends- But I call my FRiends angelic)
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To: Slings and Arrows

There are riffs and vocals that define really good songs.

You have the making of a really good song.

Ultimately, vocals don’t matter as long as they are honest, consistent and don’t sound like you are trying too hard. Less than par vocals however, IMHO, need to be married to the music more. Or washed out by the music.


58 posted on 06/30/2015 4:58:54 PM PDT by Zeneta (Thoughts in time and out of season.)
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