Feeling Silly Today?
Or, are you feeling out of sorts and just need a dose?
Here is what is on the agenda for today - June 26th:
Posted on 06/26/2015 6:13:15 AM PDT by Lucky9teen
Beautician's Day is your chance to show your appreciation to those who make you look beautiful and stunning.
Beauticians include your hair stylist, as well as manicurists. Their talents and training transforms the everyday you into the beautiful woman you always knew was inside of you. They make you glow, and feel great about yourself. The guys appreciate your Beautician, too. Proof positive is when they turn to watch as you go by.
It's fair and fitting that you show your appreciation to your Beautician today. But, we also found some reference to suggest that Beauticians consider this a day for them to show their appreciation to their patrons. Now, that's a novel and admirable concept.
Today is Take Your Dog to Work Day. And, we've just gotta ask "Why!?"
They say every dog has it's day. Well, that day has arrived. Today, your dog gets to join you at work today. Of course, this assumes that your (wonderful) boss will allow it. 
Once he arrives at work, your dog can tag along, following you on all of your work chores. He'll be at your side all day long. He'll frown at those dog eared papers n your desk. He'll end the day happy, but dog-tired.
Now, that' we've had our chuckle, it's time to recognize that this is a serious holiday for "Man's Best Friend". It is sponsored by Pet Sitters International. The objective is to recognize the importance of dogs in our lives as both companions and protectors. The organization also encourages you to help homeless dogs. One way to do so, is to adopt a dog today!
Question for the day: Once your dog has arrived at your work...now what? What do you do with him? Will there be organized activities and a luncheon in his honor!?
Sorry, but equal rights has yet to arrive in the pet world. We have not found a "Take Your Cat to Work Day", or a "Take Your Parakeet to Work Day", or .............
The Origin of Take Your Dog to Work Day:
This very special day for you and your dog was created in 1999 by Pet Sitters International.
It was created to recognize dogs as great companions, and to encourage adoptions of dogs. 
Forgiveness Day is a time to forgive and to be forgiven. The world will be a better place for this day. 
In religions:
** The Jewish celebration of Yom Kippur is a day of atonement or forgiving.
** In Christian religions,the first Sunday before Lent is called "Forgiveness Sunday".
Quote of the Day: To err is human, to forgive is divine.
Also See Pardon Day
TOP...100? Sorry I’m late. The Housework Thingy caught up with me finally and I had to get it done before I lost my gumption. And I hate when that happens as it often disappears for months at a time. :o|
How many Supreme Court judges does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, she holds the bulb still and the world revolves around her.
An attorney passed on and found himself in Heaven, but was not at all happy with his accommodations.
He complained to Saint Peter, who told him his only course of action was to appeal. The lawyer immediately appealed and was told it would take 3 years to hear his appeal. The attorney protested that this was unconscionable, but to no avail.
The lawyer was then approached by the devil who told him that he could have the appeal heard within a few days if the lawyer would change the venue to Hell.
When the lawyer asked why appeals were heard so much sooner in Hell, he was told “We have all the judges.”
A tourist wanders into a back-alley antique shop in San Francisco’s Chinatown. Picking through the objects on display he discovers a detailed, life-sized bronze sculpture of a rat. The sculpture is so interesting and unique that he picks it up and asks the shop owner what it costs.
“Twelve dollars for the rat, sir,” says the shop owner, “and a thousand dollars more for the story behind it.”
“You can keep the story, old man,” he replies, “but I’ll take the rat.”
The transaction complete, the tourist leaves the store with the bronze rat under his arm. As he crosses the street in front of the store, two live rats emerge from a sewer drain and fall into step behind him.
Nervously looking over his shoulder, he begins to walk faster, but every time he passes another sewer drain, more rats come out and follow him.
By the time he’s walked two blocks, at least a hundred rats are at his heels, and people begin to point and shout. He walks even faster, and soon breaks into a trot as multitudes of rats swarm from sewers, basements, vacant lots, and abandoned cars.
Rats by the thousands are at his heels, and as he sees the waterfront at the bottom of the hill, he panics and starts to run full tilt. No matter how fast he runs, the rats keep up, squealing hideously, now not just thousands but millions, so that by the time he comes rushing up to the water’s edge a trail of rats twelve city blocks long is behind him.
Making a mighty leap, he jumps up onto a light post, grasping it with one arm while he hurls the bronze rat into San Francisco Bay with the other, as far as he can heave it.
Pulling his legs up and clinging to the light post, he watches in amazement as the seething tide of rats surges over the breakwater into the sea, where they drown.
Shaken and mumbling, he makes his way back to the antique shop.
“Ah, so you’ve come back for the rest of the story,” says the owner.
“No,” says the tourist, “I was wondering if you have a bronze judge."
A judge was annoyed to find that his car wouldn’t start. He called a taxi, and soon one arrived at his house.
Climbing in, he told the driver to take him to the halls of justice. “Where are they,” asked the driver.
“You mean to say that you don’t know where the courthouse is?” asked the incredulous judge.
“The courthouse? Of course I know where that is.” replied the driver. “But I thought you said you wanted to go to the ‘halls of justice.’
A physician, an engineer and a judge were arguing about whose profession was the oldest. The surgeon announced, “Remember how God removed a rib from Adam to create Eve? Obviously, medicine is the oldest profession.”
The engineer replied, “But before that, God created the heavens and the earth from chaos, in less than a week. You have to admit that was a remarkable feat of engineering, and that makes engineering an older profession than medicine.”
The judge smirked, and said, “Who do you think created the chaos?”
Awww...how sweet of you...a white “x” in a black square! just what I wanted! <3
considering the Soooopremes very recent decision It appears that the halls of just us have suddenly become the halls of Just Us!
A PLANE IS ON ITS WAY TO TORONTO, WHEN A BLONDE IN
ECONOMY CLASS GETS UP, AND MOVES TO THE FIRST CLASS
SECTION AND SITS DOWN.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT WATCHES HER DO THIS, AND ASKS
TO SEE HER TICKET.
SHE THEN TELLS THE BLONDE THAT SHE PAID FOR ECONOMY
CLASS, AND THAT SHE WILL HAVE TO SIT IN THE BACK.
THE BLONDE REPLIES, “I’M BLONDE, I’M BEAUTIFUL, I’M
GOING TO TORONTO AND I’M STAYING RIGHT HERE.”
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT GOES INTO THE COCKPIT AND TELLS
THE PILOT AND THE CO-PILOT THAT THERE IS A BLONDE
SITTING IN FIRST CLASS, THAT BELONGS IN
ECONOMY, AND WON’T MOVE BACK TO HER SEAT.
THE CO-PILOT GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND TRIES TO
EXPLAIN THAT BECAUSE SHE ONLY PAID FOR ECONOMY
SHE WILL HAVE TO LEAVE AND RETURN TO HER SEAT.
THE BLONDE REPLIES, “I’M BLONDE, I’M BEAUTIFUL, I’M
GOING TO TORONTO AND I’M STAYING RIGHT HERE.”
THE CO-PILOT TELLS THE PILOT THAT HE PROBABLY SHOULD
HAVE THE POLICE WAITING WHEN THEY LAND TO ARREST
THIS BLONDE WOMAN WHO WON’T LISTEN TO REASON.
THE PILOT SAYS, “YOU SAY SHE IS A BLONDE? I’LL
HANDLE THIS, I’M MARRIED TO A BLONDE. I SPEAK BLONDE.”
HE GOES BACK TO THE BLONDE AND WHISPERS IN HER EAR,
AND SHE SAYS, “OH, I’M SORRY.” AND GETS UP AND GOES
BACK TO HER SEAT IN ECONOMY.
THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT AND CO-PILOT ARE AMAZED AND
ASKED HIM WHAT HE SAID TO MAKE HER MOVE WITHOUT
ANY FUSS.
“I TOLD HER, “FIRST CLASS ISN’T GOING TO TORONTO “.
I can relate to that.
“P or V?”
Or is it P to V?
What do you think of the Cisco’s? My team is building out several environments using them.
No but there is an angry ghost to the left of that red circle!
Once the templates are produced correctly, though, implementing a profile is pretty simple.
Dear Airlines
Dump the male flight Attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.
Replace all the female flight attendants with YOUNG good-looking strippers! What the hell!! They don’t even serve food anymore, so what’s the loss? The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a “party atmosphere” going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women. Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn’t need a salary, thus saving even more money.
Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women. Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.
This is definitely a win - win situation if we handle it right — a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.
Why didn’t Bush or Obama think of this?
Why do I still have to do everything myself?
Sincerely,
Bill Clinton
Jose and Carlos are panhandlers. They panhandle in different areas of town.
Carlos panhandles just as long as Jose but only collects 2 to 3 dollars every day.
Jose brings home a suitcase FULL of $10 bills, drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage free house and has a lot of money to spend.
Carlos says to Jose “I work just as long and hard as you do, but how do you bring home a suitcase full of $10 bills every day?”
Jose says, “Look at your sign, what does it say”?
Carlos sign reads ‘I have no work, a wife and six kids to support’.”
Jose says “ No wonder you only get $2-3 dollars.”
Carlos says... “So what does your sign say”?
Jose shows Carlos his sign. It reads, “I only need another $10.00 to move back to Mexico.”
_____
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