[baltimorepoet]

I kind of expected that would be your response. It doesn’t change the fact that single parents who “want” babies are selfishly depriving the children of a mother and a father.

Most divorces are initiated by women, thus making men single. What men or the children want is irrelevant; with the legal system, it is only what the women want that is relevant.

In a no-fault divorce, there is no family vote, there is the woman's vote. If the man and 3 children want to keep the family together, and the woman does not, her 1 vote outweighs the other 4.

Don't blame men for adapting or learning to live with the world the way it is. Even rats can adapt to getting an electric shock in a metal cage when they see a light turning on.

[CatherineofAragon]

I’m not blaming men specifically, but, as in our previous conversations, you choose to see it that way.

My point addressed single parents who choose to have children without a husband or wife.

[Albion Wilde]

Most divorces are initiated by women, thus making men single. What men or the children want is irrelevant; with the legal system, it is only what the women want that is relevant.

It can work both ways. Many women get abandoned due to no-fault when their higher-earning husband wants a younger model and tries to just dump the first wife and take the kids to live with Barbie Secretary and the big new house with the pool, while the ex is cutting coupons to survive and desperate to try to continue being the primary caregiver to her children as she has been all the times he has been out of the house 12 hours a day on his high-flying career. He can afford the attorney firepower, she can't; and judges don't always award attorney fees to the separated homemaker, especially if the husband is a big professional man in the same circles of education and earning as the judge.

Who wins in no-fault? After the lawyers, it is either the higher-earning spouse or the spouse who is, and has always been, less-invested in the marriage.

The fact that more women initiate divorce than men indicates little. It could be because they perceive the need to take action in order to remove the children from drinking, unfaithfulness or porn in the household just as much as it could be for selfish reasons.

I have known people of both sexes who have been destroyed or raked over by no-fault. Every case is individual. But as a general observation, one of the things I have noticed about an "unequally yoked" couple is that when one has the traditional expectations of marital fidelity and the other does not, nothing can possibly turn out well; yet the cheater with no marital morals to begin with has the nerve to feel outraged that the faithful partner won't just let him or her continue the cheating and also stay married. So the perceptions and self-reports of individuals remain suspect unless one really knows what has gone on behind closed doors, and few of us ever do, much less a judge who has a case before him or her for a few minutes.

That is why both parties need to value marriage much more highly, think and learn about it, and choose their partners based on values beyond sexual attraction. Few do, these days.

[dennisw]

dittos!!!
BTW 50% of today’s law school graduates are female so the legal system will become more feminized and abusive to men’s marriage and divorce rights