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To: moose07

I had an excellent meat mallet, an ice pick my mother gave me and an old fashioned egg beater, and in one of my moves, one of the “helpers” helped herself to all three. I don’t wish her any bad luck but I hope she chokes on the bones.


551 posted on 02/15/2015 7:19:46 AM PST by Monkey Face (I tried everything for getting to sleep last night, except for closing the book and putting it down.)
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To: Monkey Face; moose07; Tax-chick

An ice pick, a meat mallet, and an old-fashioned egg beater walk into a bar.

The egg beater says, “Don’t worry about us, we’re celebrating because I just got out of stir.”


552 posted on 02/15/2015 7:27:50 AM PST by NicknamedBob (Do your light housework in your dreams. What else is sleep for but to clear away the cobwebs?)
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To: Monkey Face

After our move from Oklahoma City to Tennessee, I thought the movers had taken all my religious pictures. Turned out they were in the box with my sewing machine, which I didn’t unpack for months because I wasn’t going to sew.


554 posted on 02/15/2015 7:36:47 AM PST by Tax-chick ("What does it give you, and what does it keep you from getting?")
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To: Monkey Face

Meat mallets have bones? Well that is a revelation.
Some people will half-inch anything, if it isn’t rag bolted to the ground.


559 posted on 02/15/2015 8:01:27 AM PST by moose07 (The Camels have reached the parking lot. Shields up!)
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