Speaking of "little minds", yours seems to be a bit, ah, "challenged".
In fact, setting metaphors aside, there's no real comparison between pre-Civil War slavery and today's much lamented "slavery" to Big Government.
As for that Civil War, which the Slave Power provoked, started (at Fort Sumter), formally declared (May6, 1861) and used to invade & ravage every Union state & territory they could reach... well, it ended with more liberty and justice for all, especially the former slave-owners.
I cringe for our lost cause loser FRiends when they stoop to such pathetic strawmen.