***Kitteh will have to wait. I gotta have the stuff available for the aide, or I will be without an aide.***
...
Zero Mostel singing ...
... (A funny thing happened on his way to this forum ...)
Everybody ought to have an aid,
Everybody ought to have a working churl,
Everybody ought to have a lurking churl
To putter around the house.
Everybody ought to have an aid,
Everybody ought to have a menial
Consistantly congenial
And quieter than a mouse.
Oh, oh, wouldn’t he be delicious,
Tidying up the dishes,
Neat as a pin.
Oh, oh, wouldn’t he be delightful,
Sweeping out,
Sleeping in.
Everybody ought to have an aid,
Someone who you hire when you’re short of help
To offer you the sort of help
You never get from a spouse:
Fluttering up the stairway,
Shuttering up the windows,
Cluttering up the bedroom,
Buttering up the owner,
Puttering all around the house!
Oh, oh, wouldn’t he be delicious,
Tidying up the dishes,
Neat as a pin.
Oh, oh, wouldn’t he be delightful,
Sweeping out,
Sleeping in.
Everybody ought to have an aid,
Someone who in fetching you your slipper will
Be winsome as a whipporwill
And graceful as a grouse:
Skittering down the hallway,
Flittering through the parlor,
Tittering in the pantry,
Littering up the bedroom—
...
...
Yeah, I know. It’s supposed to be “a maid”.
But “an aid” works too, you know. Equal-opportunity offenses committed daily at no extra charge.
“An aid” and “a maid” are as near the same as makes no difference, expecially if you’re singing. There’s a popular rock song, “Heaven Knows,” but the announcer on the Sirius “Octane” station always says, “Have a nose.”
This is the first “aid” I’ve had...the rest have been maids, but I have to say that the AID has out-cleaned everyone I have had since I left Texas in 2004.
Why does the congenial, delicious aid(e) bring Berry to mind?