Posted on 09/28/2014 7:11:51 PM PDT by SeekAndFind
The anecdotal evidence that Americans are remaining single longer into their lives has more and more data backing it up. No longer is it merely the musings of worried relatives hoping to see that young man or woman in their life find a spouse. According to a recent story over at Bloomberg—Is Everybody Single?—we’ve reached a statistical, verifiable relationship tipping point as a society; one with far-reaching implications.
Single Americans make up more than half of the adult population for the first time since the government began compiling such statistics in 1976.
Some 124.6 million Americans were single in August, 50.2 percent of those who were 16 years or older, according to data used by the Bureau of Labor Statistics in its monthly job-market report. That percentage had been hovering just below 50 percent since about the beginning of 2013 before edging above it in July and August. In 1976, it was 37.4 percent and has been trending upward since.
The initial gut-reaction to such news from most fellow Millennials I know is typically something akin to, “So what? I’m living my life and there’s nothing wrong with being single.”
But I would say let’s not jump right to the internalizing of perceived judgments here. Let’s take a step back and think through some of the consequences—intended or otherwise—of a society and culture that is increasingly dominated by single people. Economist Edward Yardeni authored the report in question and reminded its readers that the rise in the percentage of single Americans has very definite “…implications for our economy, society, and politics.”
Singles, particularly younger ones, are more likely to rent than to own their dwellings. Never-married young singles are less likely to have children and previously married older ones, many of whom have adult children, are unlikely to have young kids, Yardeni wrote. That will influence how much money they spend and what they buy.
One of the motivating factors behind the advancement of any civilization—and especially ours—has been the desire to leave a better world for one’s children and grandchildren. With more Americans staying single later into life, the amount of children they do end up having is considerably less than even a few decades ago.
When you are single you are less likely to save and invest your money. Your purchasing habits are very different and the industries that grow are less likely to be manufacturing and product-based and more likely to be entertainment and consumption-based. Single people want to spend their money on new apps for their smart phone (built in Asia) more so than for better housing or infrastructure.
Politically, folks who can’t be bothered to start and look after their families are more likely to turn to the government to solve their problems so that they can focus on sampling local microbrews and keeping up their compelling Instagram accounts. The pounding of the “income inequality” drum is a popular tactic by many politicians, but rarely do they share the contextual data that reveals a big reason for the jump in income inequality is the rise of singleness (because single people don’t usually make as much as a married couple can).
In my opinion, none of this is good for country or culture. As I wrote in an Acculturated piece last year, the lowering of the bar for what is expected of men in particular is a set-back, not a liberation. I spent my 20’s having fun with friends and taking the sight-seers tour through college and graduate school before meeting my wife and realizing I had been nothing short of selfish to wait so long. Of course I had many wonderful experiences and memories during those years, and marriage is not some magical contract you agree to enter that suddenly makes you a better, wiser person. And my point here is not to make someone feel worse about their current relationship status than they already do.
But a nation of single people is not translating into a bunch of folks who have more time to mentor kids or serve their community. It’s a lot of video games and children who wish both parents had stuck around. Out-of-wedlock birth rates have skyrocketed along with the rise of singleness and studies show that the number one predictor of poverty (and time spent in jail) is whether or not the person came from a single parent home.
Marriage does not fix your problems, but it most certainly begins a maturation process that accelerates with the introduction of children into the couple’s lives together. Society needs strong families to flourish. The economy needs consumers who aren’t singularly concerned with “having a good time.” The inner-workings of a free society necessitate concerned citizens who are willing to show up to everything from a PTA meeting to the voting booth on Election Day in order that we might hold those we lend power to in check.
Being married and having a family inspires citizens to care about the world around them (and not solely about saving whales and whatever Jon Stewart said was important that night).
I assume your question was your own internal debate, as it is for many of us. There is always hope.
I think it’s all a matter of poor economics and family unit breakdown. Todays’ poor economic climate makes it hard to get married and support a family, particularly at a young age. The family unit no longer exists due to many factors and people do not stay married through tough times.
When I was a kid, kids seemed to mature faster and wanted to leave home at an earlier age. They were getting married while still in high school. They were eager to fly the nest and make a life for themselves.
All they needed was a high school diploma, OJT training, or a skill (technical HS). There were lots of opportunities to earn money (both part-time and full-time) which made supporting a family possible. Family ties were strongly maintained, and marriages endured during the tough times. Also, a divorce was not so easy to obtain, it was a last resort.
There was an American Dream many tried to pursue. Acquiring wealth and keeping up with the Jones next door was the goal of many a family. To fully participate, they need someone to share the wealth, so marriage (male-female kind) was necessary. Married couples acquired wealth faster than singles.
Today, kids do not have the same situations, opportunities, and outlook on life as earlier generations. They are reluctant to leave the warm safe nest except to go to college to earn a useless degree and acquire a huge student loan debt. Then they return to the nest when they fail to get the dream job or maintain the expected lifestyle.
They see little benefit for themselves in marriage and many never get married. Those that marry, do so at a later age when they feel they can afford it. Many find it hard to commit themselves, sacrifice, and live with others. A divorce is easily obtained and many become working single-parent households. With todays’ declining economics, many of them are returning to the nest in mid-life and even later.
These are my opinions based on my experiences. Your mileage may vary.
+1
As a single man with a business here’s my opinion. The author, R.J. Moeller, can kma.
I am not breeding stock to ensure the continuation of someone’s belief in what society should be. It is not my responsibility to have children so there are more tax payers to fund welfare programs. It is not my responsibility to have a wife so that we can buy more stuff and make different investments so some company can grow. RJ Moeller’s breakdown of marriage as some important part of maintaining a society that relies and dopes who get married and spend for the sake of marrying and spending on his approved items is tiring. In his eyes we are all nothing more than cogs in a ‘great society’ with no reason to think of ourseleves or our marriage.
Furthermore in this modern society he laments for which we must become breeding stock and purchasers as a married couples he completely ignores the reality of marriage. It is a raw deal for men. Yes flame away at that but there is no denying family courts largely assume the worst of men and will destroy their lives even if they don’t have children. When your reward for assuming the role of becoming breeding stock and a spender to maintain RJ Moeller’s society is what many divorced men in my family and circle of friends is to be raked over the coals through a man hating family court is it any wonder why people don’t want to get married?
On the good side. I like that there are lots of single women out there when I’m at the pub enjoying the micro-brew that RJ Moeller complains about. When he believes I should be buying car-seats and barbies I’m much happier buying pints of IPA. I’ve busted my butt getting my business up and running and now expanding in to Poland.
By the way. Any of you freepers who do want to meet a great woman should start traveling.
I believe marriage is an important institution and that it was instituted by the Lord. That having been said, I decided to remain single (I’m very independent, frankly, and would have made a lousy life partner!). I am now 59 years old — I have a savings account, I own a house, I have worked all of my adult life, I’m civically minded, I tithe, volunteer, and I help support a needy relative. Broad brushing singles as shiftless and irresponsible isn’t fair. I do understand the need for marriage, and I am very pro-marriage, just not for me. I hate seeing singles labeled as shiftless and selfish. ‘Taint necessarily so.
APPLAUSE! Good for you!
I must stay in response to some of the comments about hen pecked husbands...as a woman, I have often felt sorry for men who are in these positions. I marvel at some of the things women expect of their husbands and my blood boils when I see it happening. It’s as though women expect men to be their personal slaves (”Change the light bulb, honey. Wash my car windows, dear...”) On the other hand, I have seen women treated horribly by overbearing men who treat them as necessary evils and can be very abusive. I really think that the problem may be that people just don’t marry the correct person for their personality type. They say opposites attract, and I think that may be a problem in these kinds of pairings.
I’m 33, single, and not overly interested in getting married. I have a job I like, a home I love, and I value my solitude. I’m in a committed relationship couple of years with a great guy who went through an acrimonious divorce and who isn’t overly anxious to try it again. If I marry, I marry. If I don’t, I don’t. But I don’t think my life would be any richer or fuller if I married for the sake of marriage alone.
Having done 20 years hard time in the prison of marriage, I am enjoying my parole.
Would I willingly connect myself to another psychotic succubus and go back to that hell?
I would rather dig out my eyeballs with red-hot spoons and fill the holes with battery acid.
But that’s just me.
In a country with the family law system this country has, any young man who gets a traditional marriage is taking a massive gamble.
Massive.
Covenant marriages not included.
This is the desired end result of the last 50 years of social policy.
Separate out the extended families to nuclear families
Atomize the nuclear family into divorced families
Now all will be single.
My new wife & I married at the threshold of sixty. I’m widowed, she was divorced, & is the same age as my original wife who died tragically at 49. We’re retired & pool our incomes. We love each other & work at building our marriage every day together.
Growing old with someone is a good thing & I couldn’t agree with you more.
This is Shery’s daughter, not Shery. I’m 41 and have never married. Don’t have kids either. Not supposed to have them, actually. I’d like to adopt, but I can’t imagine being a single mom. I never met that so-called “right man”. But the state of marriage and the selfishness of people now-a-days is good enough reason to be real hesitant about marrying. And having kids in THIS world right now????
Very good posting, SS!! Applause!!!!
Agree with your comments.
When I graduated HS in 1960, only about 20% would go to college. A higher % got married or entered the military. The majority of grads had been working at part time jobs since age 14-15, in restaurants, grocery stores, auto body shops, etc.
The brainwashing by the idiots in academia and government that EVERYONE just has to have a college degree, at an exhorbitant cost, is total BS. ....That’s a major factor in the loss of manufacturing industries and trades in America. Why the hell would a manfacturing concern, or anyone else, want to hire someone with a degree in Gender Studies or Black Studies?
A SONG DEDICATED TO YOU AND YOUR EXPERIENCE...
WEIRD AL YANKOVIC LYRICS
“One More Minute”
[constant “doo wop”s in the background throughout the song]
Aahh
Well I heard that you’re leavin’ (leavin’)
Gonna leave me far behind (so far behind)
‘Cause you found a brand new lover
You decided that I’m not your kind (aahh..)
So I pulled (I pulled) your name out (name out) of my Rolodex (oohh..)
And I tore all your pictures in two
And I burned down the malt shop where we used to go
Just because it reminds me of you (dippity dippity doo)
That’s right (that’s right) you ain’t gonna see me cryin’
I’m glad (I’m glad) that you found somebody new
‘Cause I’d rather spend eternity eating shards of broken glass
Than spend one more minute with you
I guess I might seem kinda bitter
You got me feeling down in the dumps
‘Cause I’m stranded all alone in the gas station of love
And I have to use the self-service pumps
Oh, so honey, let me help you with that suitcase
You ain’t (you ain’t) gonna break my heart in two
‘Cause I’d rather get a hundred thousand paper cuts on my face
Than spend one more minute with you
I’d rather rip out my intestines with a fork
Than watch you going out with other men
I’d rather slam my fingers in a door (yah)
Again and again and again and again and again
Oh, can’t you see what I’m tryin’ to say, Darlin...
I’d rather have my blood sucked out by leeches (leeches)
Shove an icepick under a toenail or two
I’d rather clean all the bathroom in Grand Central Station with my tongue
Than spend one more minute with you
Yes, I’d rather jump naked on a huge pile of thumbtacks
Or stick my nostrils together with crazy glue
I’d rather dive into a swimming pool filled with double-edged razor blades
Than spend one more minute with you
I’d rather rip my heart out of my ribcage with my bare hands
and then throw it on the floor and stomp on it ‘till I die
Than spend one more minute with you
Bravo.
I concur.
“Why the hell would a manfacturing concern, or anyone else, want to hire someone with a degree in Gender Studies or Black Studies?”
Government intervention I suppose. It’s an additional cost of doing business in today’s world. I think bigger companies have to meet government minority quotas as required by law and those wanting to conduct business with the current government regime must have minority representation to be eligible. Minorities often possess such degrees so they get hired to fulfil minority quotas.
Outside of that, the degree is practically useless unless they want to teach at some liberal institution.
When u come up with one, please let me know!
Thanks.
Can u share some of that wisdom on how u handle wives caught in the act of screwing someone else, one being a best friend?
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