[Bender2]

Week 3 of the strange 2014 NFL Season is upon us... and here are my dead solid, take 'em to the bank picks:

Thursday night the Georgia Black Byrds get back on the horse and beat West Florida's Pie Rates--

Sunday I see the Bolts getting back to normal voltage and getting shocked by the surprisingly strong North New York Bison-Bovinae--

I hate to go out on limb but I'm a bettin' the Deadskins with Cousin James Tee Kirk in the big QB Chair will defeather the Iggli in their natural habitat of Brothgerly Hate--

Allegra's unbeaten Texicans will give Manning Lite a good old fashioned Texas arse whippin'--

Nawleans is under the dome and they will abuse the Viqueens like redheaded stepchildren--

Allegra's Old Earlers go to TCU North and a trail of blood will show how they got back to Nashville--

Old Brownstains against New 'n Improved Brownstains calls for a coin flip. It is heads and that means the Dog Pound will be happy--

Okay, big, your Packer Wackers de-fang the Loins

The Jags get Lucky and he's pissed. He more than makes up for last Monday night's boo-boo--

Sorry, Seven, no joy in Waiderland, big's Patty Cakes roll--

Gadzooks, I hate to pick them shower soapers from Frisco but they go to Arid Zona and take butt and kick name all over the place--

Manning Heavy makes a point and hand the Seahags their second loss--

My poor old wounded and crippled Old Dallas Texans don't have a chinaman's chance against the Phins. Hey, they got the good Texas A&M Quarterback playing for them--

Cam kicks the stool out of the Stoolers, period--

Monday night Da Bears show them Jersey Jets than even a lousy quarterback is a better than what they have--

Gadzooks, almost forgot how my Boys... are going to have a Ram Roast in Saint Loouie--

On the intercollegiate slate, Kenny Thrill'a and his Fightin' Texas Aggies play just down the street from W' Presidential Library and what they do to those SMU Mustangs, W' did to Saddam Hussein but the Aggs will only take a couple of hours--

[Bender2]

Now y'all... get your pick in!

[rdb3]

It's a tangle, but I do think my Browns will knock out the Ravens this week.

It's shocking to see that Cleveland actually has an offense! That's good because the AFC North is a tough division and every point will count.

[big'ol_freeper]

Drink up lads, it's week 3!!

The Dirty Birds slash the sails of the Pirates
The Brownstains will take birdshot to the Purple Pigeons
Bender's boys will lasso the Lambs
The Packers are going to skin the Kitties
The Midgets get off the snide over the Texians
The Folds finally win one over the Jagwurts
N'alins will spank the Vicekings
The Patriots will stomp the Traitors
The Billfolds keep'a rolling over the Charredburgers
The Bengales will slash the Titians
The Sparrows will fly by the Spuds
The Cardinales will whip the 69ers like a hurricane
The Mules will pluck the Seabuzzards
The Tunas will put a lid on Bender's ol' Dallas Texans
The Punters will nail the Stools
Und
The Cessnas will rebound to be the Bearlies

There you have it...week 3

[Gay State Conservative]

The Patriots are Superbowl Championship bound.Even *without* Aaron Hernandez.

[moovova]

When’s the Pink Powder Puff Bowl scheduled? How about the Tampon Bowl?

[al_c]

Microsoft's picks

10-6 in both the first and second weeks. We'll see how it does this week.

[SevenofNine]

I think so too I think Tom Brady going make Raider his b***h this weekend

AHHH Manning Lite going get killed

I have think about it other picks

[lwd]

This week I have:

6pt teasers...
CIN-1 and IND-1
GB+8 and PHI-.5

I like CAR and HOU ATS and will take those if ATL comes through for me tomorrow.

My record is 1-4. I’m off to a bad start but I will bounce back.

[eldoradude]

All right then.

6-10 last week, 16-16 for the year.

Cowgirls bbq the Rams...slowly.

Falcons sink the Bucs

Chargers turn out the lights on Buffalo

Uglies scalp the Dreadskins

Texicans rob NY blind

Saints send the Biqueens to purgatory

Bengals eat the T*&ans

Baltimore wipes the Browns

Packers slay the Lions

Colts finally win one over the poundcats

Occupied Boston over Oaktown

Cards spank the queers

Squawks turn the Broncs into glue, again.

Miami hits KC

Carolina lays off the Stealers

and the Bears shoot down the Jests.

[Rummyfan]

Week 3

Thursday, Sept. 18

Tampa Bay Buccaneers vs. Atlanta Falcons, 8:25 p.m. Well, missed this one but I would have picked Atlanta. Not to win by 42 though!

Sunday, Sept. 21

San Diego Chargers vs. Buffalo Bills, 1 p.m. I've given the Chargers more second chances than my first wife. But... they showed something last week in beating the Seahawks. Tough to travel cross-country and play Sunday morning their time and the Bills are not a pushover this season. But, Bolts defy odds and win. San Diego!

Dallas Cowboys vs. St. Louis Rams, 1 p.m. Bendy's 'Boys beat up on the Lambs. Dallas.

Washington Redskins vs. Philadelphia Eagles, 1 p.m. Foles and Company run wild over the Deadskins. Philly.

Houston Texans vs. New York Giants, 1 p.m. Giants woes continue. Titans.

Minnesota Vikings vs. New Orleans Saints, 1 p.m. Saints get in the W column. New Orleans.

Tennessee Titans vs. Cincinnati Bengals, 1 p.m. Bengals continue winning. Cincinnati.

Baltimore Ravens vs. Cleveland Browns, 1 p.m. Ravens squeak this one out. Baltimore.

Green Bay Packers vs. Detroit Lions, 1 p.m. Two Jekyll-and-Hyde teams meet. Who's Jekyll and who's Hyde in this match? I dunno. Detroit.

Indianapolis Colts vs. Jacksonville Jaguars, 1 p.m. Colts get in the W column too (otherwise their season is over.). Indy.

Oakland Raiders vs. New England Patriots, 1 p.m. Woeful Raiders travel cross-country to meet the Pats. C'mon! Pee-Ay-Tee-Ess! New England.

San Francisco 49ers vs. Arizona Cardinals, 4:05 p.m. Are the Cards for real? This game should provide a good indicator. Cardinals.

Denver Broncos vs. Seattle Seahawks, 4:25 p.m. Peyton and Broncos still can't solve Seattle D. Seahawks.

Kansas City Chiefs vs. Miami Dolphins, 4:25 p.m. KC gets in the W column. Barely... Chiefs.

Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Carolina Panthers, 8:30 p.m. Cam and Company - especially the D - chew up the Men of Steel. Carolina.

Monday, Sept. 22

Chicago Bears vs. New York Jets, 8:30 p.m. Cutler and the Bears enjoy their trip to the Big Apple and the Jets join the G-Men in making NY football fans miserable. Bears.

[dfwgator]

Every single point in the Patriots-Raiders game was scored by a guy whose name ends with “ski.”