Ms. Redneck Alabama

al.com ^ | 28 July 2013 | Nathan T. Prewett | nprewett@al.com

[Southern Partisan]

Don't know I missed this event.

WOODSTOCK, Alabama -€“ Ms. Redneck Alabama was not your average kind of pageant.

Instead of dresses, contestants showed off cowboy boots and Daisy Dukes. Instead of singing "The Star-Spangled Banner," some of them sang "Country Girl (Shake It for Me)" by Luke Bryan or "Gunpowder and Lead" by Miranda Lambert.

More than 100 people turned out for the event Saturday at the Woodstock Festival Art Center. The event was the first of its kind to be held there, said Shelia Gunter, who helped organize it. The center normally hosts bands and other local artists.

[Lazamataz]

1) I’d hit it often, lengthwise, and repeatedly.
2) I’d hit it like the fist of an angry god.
3) I’d hit it with furious action.
4) I’d hit it until we both died.
5) I’d hit it with extreme prejudice.
6) I’d hit it without pause and without regard for safety.
7) I’d hit it, I’d hit it, I’d hit it.

[Hoodat]

I would have voted solely for the Gadsden belt buckle.

[Las Vegas Ron]

[meyer]

"...she saw an older lady with sagging arm skin that looked like carp."

Did you ever stop to think that maybe, just maybe, it WAS a carp? :-)

[Arrowhead1952]

Our daughter did get a belly button piercing, but seldom wears anything that shows it. She also has only one pierced hole in her ear lobes for one pair or earrings.

[a fool in paradise]

I’ve never understood the nose stuff. A stud in the side of the nose? So it looks like a zit? Or am I supposed to notice your nose first because it has a shiny object in it?

And nose rings? Like cattle? Or is it keep someone from picking his/her nose?

I’ve seen both on otherwise attractive women and wonder if it is done to mar their looks and dissuade some of the attention they receive (however it then tends to lure more attention from similarly altered bad boy types).

[a fool in paradise]

That looks like carp to me.

[Donald Rumsfeld Fan]

REDNECK WOMAN

[fella]

Most of them gals look like they’re from . . . uuuh . . . “gentlemen’s clubs instead of from the farm

[blam]

Who was the leading candidate for mayor of New York City until just a few day ago?

ANTHONY WEINER.

No-one else should be embarrassed about anything after that....I mean anything!!

[advertising guy]

I like the short plump one.

you might wanna rethink that....the plump on is Jake............from State Farm

[dfwgator]

I Like My Women Just a Little on the Trashy Side

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vfXs0m32A8E

[Arrowhead1952]

Got the ‘r’ and ‘a’ backward.

[doorgunner69]

and not a single c-section scar among the lot of them.

A rather bizarre observation if I might say so...........

[autumnraine]

Country Girl (Shake it for me) is quite possibly the most ridiculous song ever written. Followed closely (sang by the same twit that sang Country Girl) by “girl you make my speakers go boom boom.” And that’s a SLOW SONG!

[autumnraine]

I don’t care what you say, you gotta love Lemmy. A redneck from England. Haha

[autumnraine]

Laz, somehow, I believe you.

[autumnraine]

I always thought the jewel nose stud in Indian women to be beautiful.

[autumnraine]

Didn’t recognize him without his kackys.

[Godwin1]

Well, I don't like tattoos or short hair on gals either.

But you gotta admit: the raw female material south of the Mason Dixon Line is without peer. All those double-named beauties with that slow Southern drawl....
I went to an Ole Miss football game one time. Thought I'd died and gone to heaven.