Today’s idiot driver award goes to the person in the red Isuzu (w/ “Forward” bumper sticker) who managed to be in all 3 lanes (left, right, turn lane) on the Cape May bridge at the same time.
I’m thinking of starting a points system for this. You can get 5 points each for your driving idiocy, based on how many traffic laws you break. You get 5 points for each nonsensical liberal bumper sticker, 10 more if your license plate is from New York or Massachusetts, and 5 more if it’s from any other northern state that is not New Jersey.
Then you can get more bonus points depending on type of vehicle, age/sex of driver, etc, up to another 10. I need to work up another system for that, starting with a 16-year-old female in any type of Honda or a Ford Focus and going up from there. You can also get max points on this if you are anybody at all in a Toyota Prius.
In other news, a person a little down the street from here (in the “nice” part of Villas) now has a new Rolls-Royce Phantom. It’s very handsome. Theirs is kind of a silver-blue color.
Seeing the way most people drive, it occurs to me that I really should invest more in tire and tow-truck facilities.
Today’s idiot driver award goes to the person in the red Isuzu (w/ “Forward” bumper sticker) who managed to be in all 3 lanes (left, right, turn lane) on the Cape May bridge at the same time. I’m thinking of starting a points system for this. You can get 5 points each for your driving idiocy, based on how many traffic laws you break. You get 5 points for each nonsensical liberal bumper sticker, 10 more if your license plate is from New York or Massachusetts, and 5 more if it’s from any other northern state that is not New Jersey. Then you can get more bonus points depending on type of vehicle, age/sex of driver, etc, up to another 10. I need to work up another system for that, starting with a 16-year-old female in any type of Honda or a Ford Focus and going up from there. You can also get max points on this if you are anybody at all in a Toyota Prius.
Do these points win prizes as they accumulate or Greenshield stamps? :)
OK, so how many points for a teenage female talking on a cell phone held in her right hand while gesticulating wildly with her left hand and steering her Massachusetts plated Smart Car with who knows what while displaying Hope, Change, Forward, and Yes we can Obuma stickers, a peace sign, a walking fish, an 'I love planned parenthood' sticker, a 'visualize world peace' sticker and a bumper sticker that says 'my other car is a Prius'...
Ought to be right up there... ;-)
Bill actually got one of his friends to come pick him up to go do ... whatever. I’m flabbergasted. I thought all his friends were total mooches.