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The Best and Funniest Country (esp. the South and Mid-West) Expressions [Vanity]
Pharmboy
| 9-21-12
| Everyone
Posted on 09/21/2012 1:58:04 PM PDT by Pharmboy
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To: silentreignofheroes
Back home in CT we were called Swamp Yankees. One day I heard a case of hemorrhoids referred to as a fire on the back porch.
101
posted on
09/21/2012 3:19:14 PM PDT
by
Cowman
(How can the IRS seize property without a warrant if the 4th amendment still stands?)
To: Pharmboy
That’s like buying a pig in a poke.
To: Pharmboy
From an old USMC buddy from South Alabama, when asked if he wanted to go do something:
“Well, I can’t dance, it’s too wet to plow and too windy to stack BBs!”
Speaking of BB’s, someone who was not very bright:
“The size of his brain in his skull was like a BB rolling around inside the SuperDome.”
103
posted on
09/21/2012 3:23:38 PM PDT
by
BwanaNdege
(Man has often lost his way, but modern man has lost his address - Gilbert K. Chesterton)
To: Pharmboy
From Tennessee
Shiverin like a dog shitten razor blades
To: TheThirdRuffian
People become Methodists so they can beat the Baptists to Lunch, old joke.
To: TheThirdRuffian
People become Methodists so they can beat the Baptists to Lunch, old joke.
To: Rushmore Rocks
Ha! We used to say “So skinny he can dodge raindrops!”
107
posted on
09/21/2012 3:29:04 PM PDT
by
Melpomene
(Proud member of the Who Dat nation.)
To: Pharmboy
Finer than a frog hair split four ways. NC
108
posted on
09/21/2012 3:31:11 PM PDT
by
Duchess47
("One day I will leave this world and dream myself to Reality" Crazy Horse)
To: Pharmboy
Describing a very shapely lady....
"She was built like a burlap bag full of bobcats".
109
posted on
09/21/2012 3:33:24 PM PDT
by
capt. norm
(Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never run out of material. c)
To: Pharmboy
All hat and no cattle.
(blow hards—people who brag a lot)
(Southern Colorado)
110
posted on
09/21/2012 3:35:07 PM PDT
by
adgirl
To: Pharmboy
You don't have the brains God promised a doughnut.
She looks like her face caught on fire and someone put it out with an ice pick.
She's shade in the summer and warmth in the winter.
That's quite a hitch she has in her get along.
I'd hit that!
111
posted on
09/21/2012 3:35:45 PM PDT
by
davius
(You can roll manure in powdered sugar but that don't make it a jelly doughnut.)
To: davius
Serious as a heart attack (Florida natives)
She/he looks like they’ve been rode hard and put up wet (to describe someone weary or homely)
112
posted on
09/21/2012 3:39:12 PM PDT
by
varina davis
(A real American patriot -- Gov. Rick Perry)
To: davius
She's shade in the summer and warmth in the winter.So.. she's fat
113
posted on
09/21/2012 3:41:19 PM PDT
by
GeronL
(The Right to Life came before the Right to Pursue Happiness)
To: Pharmboy
Dad’s from Texas:
“That’s like shootin’ fish in a barrel” (usually used when someone related a underachieving accomplishment)
“That gal’s about a double ax-handle” (used to reference a large behind)
“She’s as big as a barn door” (dad’s got a thing about large women)
“Oh I guess I was about half-drunk” (I’ve decided he means he was really drunk but can still recall the evening)
114
posted on
09/21/2012 3:41:46 PM PDT
by
gopwhit
To: Pharmboy
Go rent the the movie Bernie. It’s packed fuller ‘n a tick on a coon dog with expressions like this.
115
posted on
09/21/2012 3:44:20 PM PDT
by
Melpomene
(Proud member of the Who Dat nation.)
To: GeronL
So.. she's fat
She's low, slow, and needful.
116
posted on
09/21/2012 3:45:54 PM PDT
by
davius
(You can roll manure in powdered sugar but that don't make it a jelly doughnut.)
To: 21twelve
It’s cattawampus and cattycornered here.
Another funny one, if someone was full after Sunday dinner, when asked if they’d like another slice of pie or something, they’d say “thank you, thank you very much, but no, I’m sufficiently sufficed.”
To: KittenClaws
Theyre so poor they dont have a pot to pee in nor a winda to throw it out ofI heard this exact phrase just the other day.
To: Pharmboy
Dad also used to say:
“She’s got more hang ups than a tree full of possums” (chick with issues)
But I googled it and looks like possums don’t actually hang. I’ll have to ask him about this one.
119
posted on
09/21/2012 3:49:02 PM PDT
by
gopwhit
To: Pharmboy
I'll be on (her, you, them, etc) like white on rice !
Waaaay southern Illinois
120
posted on
09/21/2012 3:49:11 PM PDT
by
tomkat
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