[Luna]

The first thing a good opus needs is that beginning line. The Opus Headline. Perhaps we can all come up with some real doozies in an effort to assist those who might be contemplating an opus in the future. After all, opus people, you have to consider your audience. You don’t want to bore them. “I am leaving Free Republic. Good bye,” is a headline that just doesn’t do it. It doesn’t excite us. It doesn’t pull us in. Go out in a wild, blaze of glory of hugh (yes, I meant hugh) proportions! Come up with something clever! Something amazing! Something that will get you a high score!

I kinda like this (picture Khan): “…from Hell's heart, I stab at thee! For hate's sake, I spit my last breath at thee!”

Now that’s dramatic! That shows feeling!

So, Freepers, what would be the first line your opus (if you ever decide to write one)?

Disclaimer: this is for purely entertainment purposes to get away from the doom and gloom of the news for a while, and should not in any way be construed as a real opus.

[KentTrappedInLiberalSeattle]

“Nobody moves... nobody gets hurt.”

[vpintheak]

As the military drones buzzed overhead, the young boy read an old scribbled message on the notebook, “It didn’t have to be this way.”

[icwhatudo]

The clintons finally found me!

[Eric in the Ozarks]

Been here and gone.
Had a good time.

[Luna]

“My real name is R-725123512 and my mother ship has finally arrived to take me back home, so I must bid adieu to this place called Free Republic because it causes me the most horrendous allergies,” someone might write as an opus.

[RobertClark]

Charles Dickens already nailed mine for me:

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to heaven, we were all going direct the other way - in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.

[central_va]

I’m not hitting it any more.

[gzzimlich]

I am leaving Free Republic because the UK gov’t decided it was a forum for “promoting intolerance” and the armed response unit is about to kick in my door.

I will meet them with the one anti-stab kitchen knife I was allowed to purchase under the new “pointed weapons control act” and my sub-12ft lbs muzzle energy airgun allowed under the firearms control act blazing.

It was fun while it lasted. Godspeed!

[HerrBlucher]

“I’m a whiny narcissist drama queen that is threatening to leave but want you all to beg me to stay because I am soooo important to this site.”

[KosmicKitty]

I SWEAR I didn’t do it!!

The feds arrested the wrong person!! I was taking my weekly ballroom dance lesson when the explosion happened. The person who planted that bomb just bore an remarkable likeness too me

Really!!

[SWAMPSNIPER]

Who left this time? I must have missed the screen door slamming on their butt!

[ExGeeEye]

"You tattered remnants of a once great forum...

"You, whose casques did affright the air at the Clinton impeachment...

"You, who stomped Rathernot's forgery into oblivion in mere hours...

"Have devolved into a quackery of insipid malediction, flatulent discourse upon recipes and cats, tepid maunderings over podgy antipodal directors reworking British fairy stories...

"You are no more worthy of my eloquence, or may attention, than is a very...pajock.

"Beshrew ye all."

NOT REALLY! JUST KIDDING! NOT A REAL OPUS!

[Wordkraft]

“Grab some pine, Meat. I’m sending in the new guy.”

[discostu]

I’d probably quote the entire John Whorfin/ Mussolini speech from Buckaroo Bonzai.

[null and void]

Unaccustomed to public speaking as I am...

[martin_fierro]

"Dear Penthouse Forvm -- I never thought this would happen to me, but...."

 ______              __                   __                         ___      
/\__  _\            /\ \                 /\ \__         __          /\_ \     
\/_/\ \/     ___    \_\ \  __  __    ____\ \ ,_\  _ __ /\_\     __  \//\ \    
   \ \ \   /' _ `\  /'_` \/\ \/\ \  /',__\\ \ \/ /\`'__\/\ \  /'__`\  \ \ \   
    \_\ \__/\ \/\ \/\ \L\ \ \ \_\ \/\__, `\\ \ \_\ \ \/ \ \ \/\ \L\.\_ \_\ \_ 
    /\_____\ \_\ \_\ \___,_\ \____/\/\____/ \ \__\\ \_\  \ \_\ \__/.\_\/\____\
    \/_____/\/_/\/_/\/__,_ /\/___/  \/___/   \/__/ \/_/   \/_/\/__/\/_/\/____/
 ____    __                                __    __         
/\  _`\ /\ \__                            /\ \__/\ \        
\ \,\L\_\ \ ,_\  _ __    __    ___      __\ \ ,_\ \ \___    
 \/_\__ \\ \ \/ /\`'__\/'__`\/' _ `\  /'_ `\ \ \/\ \  _ `\  
   /\ \L\ \ \ \_\ \ \//\  __//\ \/\ \/\ \L\ \ \ \_\ \ \ \ \ 
   \ `\____\ \__\\ \_\\ \____\ \_\ \_\ \____ \ \__\\ \_\ \_\
    \/_____/\/__/ \/_/ \/____/\/_/\/_/\/___L\ \/__/ \/_/\/_/
 __  __                                 /\____/
/\ \/\ \                                \/___/
\ \ \_\ \  __  __    ___ ___     ___   _ __ 
 \ \  _  \/\ \/\ \ /' __` __`\  / __`\/\`'__\
  \ \ \ \ \ \ \_\ \/\ \/\ \/\ \/\ \L\ \ \ \/
   \ \_\ \_\ \____/\ \_\ \_\ \_\ \____/\ \_\
    \/_/\/_/\/___/  \/_/\/_/\/_/\/___/  \/_/
 ____    ______   __  __  ____
/\  _`\ /\__  _\ /\ \/\ \/\  _`\
\ \ \L\ \/_/\ \/ \ \ `\\ \ \ \L\_\  
 \ \ ,__/  \ \ \  \ \ , ` \ \ \L_L  
  \ \ \/    \_\ \__\ \ \`\ \ \ \/, \
   \ \_\    /\_____\\ \_\ \_\ \____/
    \/_/    \/_____/ \/_/\/_/\/___/                                   

[wolfcreek]

Shouldn’t the question be, “Why have there been so many opuses?”

[CatherineofAragon]

“And now, in keeping with Channel 40’s policy of always bringing you the latest in blood and guts, in living color, you’re about to see another first — an attempted suicide.”

[Political Junkie Too]

"THESE are the times that try men's souls. The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country; but he that stands by it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and woman. Tyranny, like hell, is not easily conquered; yet we have this consolation with us, that the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly: it is dearness only that gives every thing its value. Heaven knows how to put a proper price upon its goods; and it would be strange indeed if so celestial an article as FREEDOM should not be highly rated. Britain, with an army to enforce her tyranny, has declared that she has a right (not only to TAX) but "to BIND us in ALL CASES WHATSOEVER" and if being bound in that manner, is not slavery, then is there not such a thing as slavery upon earth. Even the expression is impious; for so unlimited a power can belong only to God."

-The American Crisis, December 23, 1776, Thomas Paine

-PJ

[Lazamataz]

The first line of my opus would be as follows:

"The snow-whipped landscape went on for as far as the eye could see. Morgan shouldered his M-16, knowing that there only was twelve minutes left until the boomer arrived. Soon, the ice began to crackle, then pop, then roar, as the submarine began to surface through the ice pack. Help had arrived at last."