<I don’t feel like happily telling them ‘congratulations!’ or talking about baby things. I think about how this poor kid is going to feel about his/her parent situation
Think about how this ‘poor kid’ is going to feel with family members who can barely restrain themselves from telling the child how disgusted they are and how sorry they are for having gay parents - even though the child had no choice in the matter.
This child is as much a child of God as you are. You could try treating it as one. Loving kindness from other family members could go a long way to helping the child deal with what may be a difficult situation as s/he grows up.
I have two gay nephews (brothers, figure the odds on THAT!). One is an interior decorator with TV gigs and is making pots of money. He’s in a committed relationship. The other works for EPA. We have had some interesting discussions. He’s also quite conservative. This guy was in a commited relationship with a guy who was universally well thought of by our family. I love both of the guys almost like my own sons, both of whom think the world of their cousins. The EPA guy is especially fond of HIS two nephews and nobody in the family has any problem with him taking these two little boys out for ice cream, etc. These guys’ dad is a super-macho hunter, deep-sea fisherman, and all around tough guy. He has never allowed their “condition” to affect his love for his sons. He also has two daughters and sometimes tells people that he has four daughters.