[JustAmy]

[Billie]

LOL! I love Maxine. Here's an email I got a couple of weeks ago (which some may have seen), but it's so cute and funny, I'm posting it anyway. :)

PRESIDENT IN 2012

Here we are, already discussing the future President of
the United States, beginning with the Year 2012.

For those of you who would like THE VERY BEST choice for
President, we have a solution: It is probably time we have
a woman as President. One choice is a very special lady
who has just about every answer to assist in helping us
to solve our problems.

PLEASE give this a thought when you have a moment...

MAXINE FOR PRESIDENT!


Very eloquently put...........don't you think?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

• Maxine on "Driver Safety" "I can't use the cell phone in the car.. I have to keep my hands free for making gestures.".......
  
  
• Maxine on "Lawn Care" "The key to a nice-looking lawn is a good mower. I recommend one who is muscular and shirtless."
  
  
• Maxine on "The Perfect Man" "All I'm looking for is a guy who'll do what I want, when I want, for as long as I want, and then go away. Or wait nearby, like a Dust Buster, charged up and ready when needed."
  
  
• Maxine on "Technology Revolution" "My idea of rebooting is kicking somebody in the butt twice."
  
  
• Maxine on "Aging" "Take every birthday with a grain of salt. This works much better if the salt accompanies a Margarita."
  
  
• "The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket."
  
  
• "To err is human; to forgive, highly unlikely."
  
  
• "Do you realize that in about forty years, we'll have millions of old ladies running around with tattoos and pierced navels?" (Now that's scary!)
  
  
• "Money can't buy happiness--but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than a Kia."
  
  
• "After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching somewhere...you may be dead.."

If you don't forward this to ten of your friends within
the next five minutes, nothing will happen..but you'll rob
them of a whole bunch of much-needed laughter.

[Dubya]

funny, but painfully true
A Harley biker is riding by the zoo in Washington , DC, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents.

The biker jumps off his Harley, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch.

Whimpering from the pain, the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.

A reporter has watched the whole event.

The reporter addressing the Harley rider says, ‘Sir, this was the most gallant and brave thing I’ve seen a man do in my whole life.’

The Harley rider replies, ‘Why, it was nothing, really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger and acted as I felt right.’

The reporter says, ‘Well, I’ll make sure this won’t go unnoticed. I’m a journalist, you know, and tomorrow’s paper will have this story on the front page. So, what do you do for a living and what political affiliation do you have?’

The biker replies, ‘I’m a U.S. Marine and a Republican.’

The journalist leaves.

The following morning the biker buys the paper to see if it indeed brings news of his actions, and reads, on the front page:

U.S. MARINE ASSAULTS
AFRICAN IMMIGRANT
AND STEALS HIS LUNCH

That pretty much sums up the media’s approach to the news these days.

SEMPER FI