Replies

I was in a somewhat similar situation once. I had been involved with a woman who had lied to me at every step in our relationship. However, I had forgiven some lies and ignored others. As I was telling her that I wanted out of the situation, I was bracing for her to come back with another round of nonsense and either argue things or try to restart things. I actually called the local court system in her town to get a Freedom of Information request to find out whether she'd ever been arrested or convicted of anything. I wrote the letter and was ready to send the request. The engineer in me wanted to collect data in order to draw a conclusion and support that conclusion. Life was busy, and I didn't get around to sending it for about a week or so. During that time, she hadn't tried to call or e-mail. I finally said, "Okay, I think I'm free of this mess. I don't have to go forward." I ended up being right, and I never had to talk to her again.

Bill

That's a very ugly story, and it points to another important point. Sometimes, when we don't believe an accuser, the issue isn't that the accuser is lying. The accuser may simply be mistaken or have jumped to a wrong conclusion. Sadly, in the effort to encourage women to come forward when they are really harmed, we've lost the ability to analyze these situation carefully. I'm glad that no further harm came to you.

I know, Thank God. I put my Apple //e away for the weekend, didn;t touch a computer at all, but my college work required it so I put it back together and only used the modem to call up the college mainframe for my assignments. Yeah, you're right, it was more of a "jump to conclusion thing" than a lying thing but still you can hurt a lot of innocents that way. The scariest was my almost blacking out, (I remember driving but not much) while driving. I had a friend who did the same thing when he was super drunk, it got so bad, he blacked out Wednesday and came out of it Sunday, he just kept driving around for that time, woke up in Ohio.

I'm pretty much over it, but it is a shame that had such a negative experience. Sounds like you had a rough time too.