Honestly, Jen... that sounds really sad.
They won't disown us, of course, but their feelings will be hurt, and I don't feel great about that.
You'd have to be in my parents' shoes to understand. I mean literally they bent over backwards for years to try and accomodate these people. Literally. I mean, the choice of where we moved was dictated by wanting to stay within driving distance. The last time my mom's dad and stepmother visited, they criticized my sisters for not going to Ivy League schools, ignored the boys completely, and spent the whole time bragging on her cousins. My dad is angry with his parents for supporting his brother who left his wife and five kids.
I really ency people with extended families. I'm looking forward to experiencing one myself once my sibs and I start having kids. Cousins who will talk to you? Aunts and uncles who greet you in the grocery store? Grandparents who show some indication that they actually care? It sounds great. I guess you can't have everything though and I wouldn't trade my parents or sibs for the best grandparents in the world.
Well, at least not till we break the news about the converting to Buddhism thing. ;~D