LET'S RIDE
Posted on 06/17/2005 7:10:18 AM PDT by Skooz
Um. Ok. Here we are.
Give me a minute while I forge some up.
In the days of the Wild West, there was a young cowboy who wanted more than anything to be the greatest gunfighter in the world. He practiced every minute of his spare time, but he knew that he wasn't yet first-rate and that there must be something he was doing wrong.
Sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, he recognized an elderly man seated at the bar that had the reputation of being the fastest gun in the West in his day.
The young cowboy took a seat next to the old-timer, bought him a drink, and told him the story of his great ambition. "Do you think you could give me some tips?" he asked.
The old man looked him up! and down and said, "Well, for one thing, you're wearing your gun too high. Tie the holster a lil' lower down on your leg.
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young man.
"Sure will," said the old-timer.
The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his 44 and shot the bow tie off the piano player. "That's terrific!" said the cowboy. "Got any more tips for me?"
"Yep," said the old man. "Cut a notch out of your holster where the hammer hits it. That'll give you a smoother draw."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the younger man.
"You bet it will," said the old-timer.
The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun in a blur, then shot a cufflink off the piano player. "Wow!" said the cowboy. "I'm learning' somethin' here. Got any more tips?"
The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon. "See that axle grease over there? Coat your gun with it."
The young man went over to the can and smeared some of the grease on the barrel of his gun.
"No," said the old-timer, "I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and all."
"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young man.
"No," said the old-timer, "but when Wyatt Earp gets done playing the Piano, he's going to shove that gun up your ass and it won't hurt as much.
Thanks for that, mine just ran and hid behind the pocket flaps in fear.
Thanks.
I took off work early yesterday to have it delivered. I had to buy some new cables for my hookup, and it ended up taking me most of the day.
We watched "Master and Commander" on my progressive scan DVD last night.
Awesome.
Barbara Walters of 20/20 (USA-ABC Television) did a story on gender roles in Kabul, Afghanistan several years before the Afghan conflict. She noted that women customarily walked 5 paces behind their husbands.
She recently returned to Kabul and observed that women still walk behind their husbands. From Ms. Walters vantage point, despite the overthrow of the oppressive Taliban regime, the women now seem to walk even further back behind their husbands and are happy to maintain old customs.
Ms. Walters approached one of the Afghani women and asked, "Why do you now seem happy with the old custom that you once tried so desperately to change?"
The woman looked Ms. Walters straight in the eyes and without hesitation, said "Land mines."
bwahahahahaha!!!
LOL! Funny.
I love smart girls! :)
LET'S RIDE
Let's. Very cool.
OMG! A Boston Terrier? Bwwwwwwwaaaaaaaaa.........*~*
What's so funny about a Boston Terrier? :0)
Nothing funny at all...........We had one that lived to be 16 years old. We LOVE those dogs.........we finished our "dog havings" with English Bull Dogs. How we miss them. They are so funny, loving, loyal and a sheer pleasure to have.......Bostons and English.
*Glowing symbol burns a hole in the floor, a low throbbing bass tone pummels the ears as something teleports in and hisses*
"It must be DONE!"
[long quiet pause]
OOps, wrong thread!
[runs out side door]
We currently have a Boston and a Boxer.
Our next will be an English Bulldog. I love them.
I love you too!
;-)
This has been a Skooz Production,
in cooperation with Skooz Enterprises Intl. Inc.
No animals, vegetables or minerals were harmed during the production of this thread.
Drive Safely. Good Night
English Bulldogs look like Winston Churchill and snore like him too.
Skooz, our happiest times were with our English Bulldogs. We had 3 generations and lost our last one 2 years ago. They were all 9 and 10 years old........the life expectancy is 8 years........our house looked like heck......they LOVE sheetrock.......LOL. I wouldn't trade all the slobbering, the holes in the walls (of course we fixed them), the snoring, the wheezing for anything in the world. We've remodeled our house after we lost the last one and we're trying not to think about getting another one, but it's not easy. Good luck with your Boston.......it's precious!
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