"Star Wars" Downsizes

Got the Boba Fett blues now that George Lucas has wrapped his final Star Wars movie installment?

Jedi master George turned up over the weekend at Celebration III, a mega-gathering of 30,000 Star Wars geeks in Indianapolis, where he announced plans to move his space opera to the small screen.

For his first appearance at a Star Wars convention in 17 years, Lucas made a big splash. During a Q&A session, he announced that he is going to produce a 3-D animated action series expanding on the Cartoon Network's Emmy-winning Clone Wars. Then he dropped a bigger bomb, confirming a live-action Star Wars spinoff series is in the works.

Does that mean we'll get to see Darth Vader duking it out with the Donald on the next Apprentice?

According to Lucas, both shows will take place during the period between the end of Star Wars: Episode III--Revenge of the Sith and the original Star Wars (aka Episode IV--A New Hope), when the Emperor became all-powerful and started hunting the Jedi down.

Lucas said the live-action series is the more ambitious undertaking, attempting to translate the magic of the Star Wars universe to the small screen via supporting characters that fans have only briefly come to know from the movies. The filmmaker added that the show will also be similar in tone to the Young Indiana Jones Chronicles, the TV adventures inspired by his other mega-franchise.

It was awful. Lucas must have used Michael Moore as a consultant for character development and a comic book editor for dialog.

The acting was cardboard (and these actors are far more capable). I'm reminded of the scene in "Amadeus" when Mozart complains of Italian Opera: "

"Oh, bello, bello, bello! Come on now, be honest. Wouldn't you all rather listen to your hairdressers than Hercules? Or Horatius? Or Orpheus? All those old bores! people so lofty they sound as if they $h!t marble!"

The scenes were comic book frames. An "ADD" victim would complain of "channel surfing" between the scenes. Maybe, by keeping the scenes short, they wouldn't have to pay the CGI crew as much money (as it was the computer graphics were the only thing worth seeing).

The theology was in error. Anyone who sees spirituality as less than absolute will fawn over the "force".

The politics were obviously extreme leftists.

Nice special effects...it reminded me of "Star Trek, the Motion Picture"...but Episode 3 is a worse film. I'll wager 1 fictitious Federation Credit that if Lucas has an extended DVD version of this unworthy Ton-ton dropping, then he'll argue that abortion would have prevented Anakin Skywalker from looking to the "dark side" to "save the life of mother."

The crowd was almost sprinting out of the theater as soon as the first closing credit appeared.

Was Lucas smoking dope and drinking throughout the production? Some of the dialog between Portman (Padmé) and Christensen (Skywalker), and later McGregor (Kenobi) was so horrifying, it made me wonder if Lucas was out of his mind. It was so obviously edited and re-spliced very badly. How many takes were needed among these actors to get the right overacted emotionless cardboard comic book effect? It needed a Harrison Ford, Han Solo so badly.

I'm so happy it's dead. Instead of making a beautiful film, Lucas tried to insult politicians quoting "evil empire" and he poorly attempts belittling the conservative values he hates. Those who lavish praise on these films look like fanatics needing religion...because they use these dime novels as a religion.

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