Spouse Moved Out and I am Picking Up the Pieces, How did you manage starting out again

11.19.03 | self

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

You know me by another name. This is too personal but I value Freeper advice. My husband has been gone for about 6 months and today he moved into a house he bought. The story is long, difficult and really not important. What is important is that I have to somehow manage the house, the children, the homeschooling and work. I have been on overdrive for two + years working full time and homeschooling. Prior to that our family spent close to three years ducking and recovering from the bombs my husband ignited in our lives.I am exhausted and need Freeper Wisdom and encouragement.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

I boxrd up some extras for him. I have my angry moments but they are getting farther apart. I am mostly just really sad now.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it




Good words.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

You will not die, you will not break, but you are going to cry and you are going to hurt like hell. Then, you are going to get over it because your life is going to get better. For real. I know, because it happened to me.

I am praying for you


Thank you

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

I am also talking to a pastor who knows us both. I was able to explain what had happened from my perspective. He and his wife are very kind.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

Do what is best for you and the kids.
Forget the past, it is not comming back.
Smile and move foward.


As I told the children, it is never going to go back the way it was but it will be a different better.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

I would join a support group , on line or local , for single parents who homeschool for advice. I would find an older person with a teaching background, through church, retirement center, who could help me with lesson plans and perhaps do some hands on for trade, or what ever pay I could afford. Perhaps one who has no family and looking for something to do. I would sell my house if it was too big, and cost effective. I would get a small used car and tell the kids to get ready to tighten the belt. I would try to find ways to make it seem fun.


Thank you for your good ideas. I would like to keep homeschooling stable if I can..

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

Thank you

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

you think a reconciliation would be ideal?

The best thing that could happen is that my children have a reconciled and stable mother and father. That is an ideal. I don't think we are going there.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

I have been thinking about that. I have an apartment that I am builting for cash to finish the house....just part of the story. But I also have two rooms that could be used for a mom and her child (ren).

I could use a wife right now!!

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

He is paying his child support like clockwork, I am fortunate. Funny the state mandates that he pays us each month a little more than what he used to make in one day.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

He has the retirement assets. I have the apartment building free and clear, I had a death in the family and a small inheritace and I paid it off, so I have an income out of one property and the other property is where we live, it will appreciate significantly in the next ten years and that will be my retirement.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

Take care, dear, we care about you.

Thank you

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

It's obvious your schedule is tight, but try your best to join yourself and your children to a loving church family. Relationships will grow slowly, but when they take root, your church friends, through the Lord's goodness, will be able to provide the prayer/emotional/mental/physical support you and your children will need in the time to come.

My children are in a Wed program and that is when I connect. Although it is not my homechurch....it has made a big difference.

[Diva Betsy Ross]

Let me know if I can help. I have lots of resorces for free materials, although you have already been through it with your oldest and most likely have your materials saved for your youngest. I know there are e-mail loops through yahoo for single parents who homeschool. I hope you can find a group in your area and you can band together to help each other out. Really, my thoughts are with you and your kids.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

There IS clarity. He moved out, he hasn't come back, and now he's made it clear he ain't gonna. Count your blessings!

You are right. He has had a problem with facing the truth of his actions. And it continues.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

9. Remove the Fork, there is still some life in ya! };O)

Think so???

LOL I needed that.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

CHANGE YOUR CHECKING AND SAVINGS ACCOUNTS.

Did this months ago. Have been separating out for about 8 months. Slowly.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

Do you have any friends you see a few times a week -- in person? You know, going over there house to relax and hang out and do this or that together friends?


I have friends but my schedule doesn't allow much sitting and chatting. Just quick talks as I drop off or pick up kids.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

He is smashing things. He goes for part two of the neuropsych eval on tuesday. Rigid thinking and teasing sisters.

[Stick a Fork in Me - I am Done]

For thirty years I've, from time to time, wondered about the "other side". Perhaps my four sons could give you some indication of just what that has been, with a mother who totally ignores them until she "needs" something.

How sad for your boys. She sounds narcisistic (life without spell check).
My husband has turned into a sort of a empty shell.