Failure to Warn [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 25 May 2025 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

This week, Chairman of the Permanent Subcommittee on Investigations Senator Ron Johnson (R-Wisc) held a hearing to reveal the findings of a report titled: Failure to Warn: How Federal Health Agencies Downplayed the Risk of Myocarditis and Other Adverse Events Following COVID-19 Vaccination.

He opened the hearing by asking former director of the National Institutes of Health (NIH) Francis Collins "isn't myocarditis a serious medical condition that can cause death? Once data showed that within the first few months that the COVID vaccine was available adverse events included nearly 3,000 fatalities, nearly half of which occurred within three days of injection, why wasn't this information made public?"

Collins blandly pointed out that "eventually, everyone dies. Whether an individual's death occurs at a young or an old age, the difference in terms of the billions of years that our universe will exist is infinitesimal. In global terms our planet is currently overpopulated. At some point a merciful method of eliminating the excess members of the human race must be achieved. A desperate effort to indiscriminately save lives strikes me as a wrong approach for us to take."

Senator Richard Blumenthal (D-Conn) spoke in favor of withholding a warning, arguing that "the COVID vaccines saved millions of lives. The loss of thousands of lives due to myocarditis is tiny in comparison. A warning of its dangers to a subset of younger males could have frightened the folks who really needed the vaccines and caused even more fatalities. As a young male I risked my life in combat in Vietnam. Why shouldn't the young males of the pandemic era be required to risk their lives in the battle against a deadly disease?"

Cardiologist Dr. Peter McCullough contested the assertion that the COVID vaccines saved lives, saying "since it has been shown that this so-called vaccine does not prevent a person from contracting the disease or transmitting it to others there is no proof that it saved lives. By mid 2021 over half of the US was 'fully vaccinated,' but deaths attributed to COVID increased. Natural immunity and the mutation of the virus to milder forms of the disease are the main reasons why the pandemic subsided."

"Well, during the pandemic Dr. Fauci was recognized as the foremost expert on COVID," Blumenthal reminded everyone. "He practically invented the disease with his earlier covert support for gain-of-function research. It was only natural that we should've trusted him when he insisted that a vaccine was the only way out of the pandemic. Lord knows what a disaster might have occurred if folks had been allowed to take unproven drugs like ivermectin or hydroxychloroquine. We are fortunate that President Biden had the foresight to mandate the vaccines for all federal employees, the armed service, all medical professions, and all workers in firms with more than 100 employees."

In related news, now that the Food and Drug Administration is under new management it has ordered Pfizer and Moderna to strengthen their warning labels and admit that their shots can cause long-lasting heart damage, particularly in adolescent boys and young men. Health and Human Services Secretary Robert Kennedy, Jr. said "while we can't undo the harm that was done during the Biden years we can try to deter uninformed use of these dangerous drugs in the future by putting a warning label on the product. The false claim of 'safe and effective' must never again be permitted to lure the gullible into an unhealthy choice."