Posted on 04/16/2020 5:06:30 PM PDT by bitt
Trump has built up a lot of buzz over the coming stimulus payments, saying he has hidden five golden tickets among the checks heading to Americans this week.
Anyone who gets a golden ticket will win a free tour of Mar-a-Lago. Rumor has it that Trump will be watching them closely to see which of the winners has the qualities he looks for in a manager, with the best candidate getting hired as Mar-a-Lago's onsite McDonald's manager.
"Who will win? Nobody knows!" Trump said gleefully as he carefully signed each of the golden tickets before hiding them among the stimulus checks. "I, Donald Trump, have decided to allow five Americans — just five, mind you, and no more — to visit my resort this year. These lucky five will be shown around personally by me, and they will be allowed to see all the secrets and the magic of my hotel and golf resort -- the best golf, maybe ever. Then, at the end of the tour, as a special present, all of them will be given Season 1 of The Apprentice on DVD!"
"So watch out for the Golden Tickets! Five Golden Tickets have been printed on golden paper, and these five Golden Tickets have been hidden in your stimulus checks. These five may be anywhere — in any mailbox in the country. And the five lucky finders of these five Golden Tickets are the only ones who will be allowed to visit my Mar-a-Lago during the lockdown. Good luck to you all!"
Unfortunately, he put all five golden tickets in a stimulus envelope addressed to Jim Acosta.
p
The BEE........satire aka fake news
It’s as real as CNN.
Oh man. Now you guys had to go and do it didnt you!
Now the fake news will be reporting this as fact.
That is how dam dumb they are.
Can’t wait for the memes of Nancy Pelosi as Veruca Salt and Jerry Nadler as the fat German kid.
Don’t tell me that the Orange Man also has orange midgets working for him at Mar-A-Lago
No ticket for me with direct deposit! Orange Man would take me for ice cream and I would only get one scoop when he gets two!!!
Love this!
ROTFLMAO
How does that work with direct deposit? ?:^0
Liberals will not look at the source and they’ll have another screaming fit about President Trump over it.
Lmao
“Trump Announces He Has Hidden 5 Golden Tickets Among Stimulus Checks”
yeah, and unlike the electronically deposited checks that include only a printed likeness of President Trump’s signature, he personally signed the 5 Golden Tickets ... and in fact,that’s the best way to tell if your Golden Ticket is legitimate, rather than one of the millions of counterfeit ones that are circulating ...
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