Posted on 08/25/2019 11:25:36 AM PDT by John Semmens
Socialist presidential contender Sen. Bernie Sanders (Vt) vowed to “criminally prosecute the men who run the fossil fuel corporations that are wrecking the environment. The claim that they are merely giving their customers what they want—the fuel to cool and heat their homes and power the factories that produce merchandise and the fuel to power their cars and to truck the merchandise from factory to market—is the same type of claim that Al Capone used to justify his bootlegging.”
“It’s time for saner heads to make the hard decisions required to save the planet,” Sanders said. “We need to wean people off the idea that they should get what they want. Under democratic socialism the government will determine what is best for everyone. That’s why my $16 trillion green new deal calls for all resources to be controlled by the government. Only then can we ensure that these resources will be invested for the best purposes.”
Sanders rejected objections citing Venezuela’s socialist failures as a cautionary warning against the policies he is proposing, saying that “the claim that Venezuela’s approach has failed is a myth concocted by capitalists. That country has dramatically reduced its carbon footprint. Fossil fuel consumption has plummeted. Food that was previously discarded has been rescued from the dump and consumed. I see no reason why the United States cannot achieve similar results from a fully implemented green new deal.”
The senator rebuffed contentions that without the fossil fuels that his green new deal would eliminate air travel would be impossible. “First of all, a lot of the air travel we have now is unnecessary,” he argued. “A small reserve of fuel should be sufficient to sustain crucial government air travel. Candidates for federal office would still be allotted enough fuel to make necessary campaign stops. The unavailability of fuel for nonessential travel would spur innovations. I heard some interesting ideas on how gliders could be used to provide a modicum of air travel for non-government individuals. The only glitch is getting these vehicles airborne. But I remember as a kid using a rubber band to launch my mini-glider. Perhaps this could be adapted for larger craft.”
Meanwhile, Sanders has called for abolishing “right-to-work” laws, saying that “only capitalist oppressors would tout such a ‘right.’ Work is a burden. Government ought to relieve as many people of this burden as possible. When I am president only the rich will have the right to work. Everyone else will have the right to a fair share of the wealth created by those who are working.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
https://azconservative.org/2019/08/24/buttigieg-blames-trump-for-mental-illness/
I told my boss that he was going to the gulag.
Makes infinitely more sense to simply to throw our communists into forced labor camps.
How very Stalinesque of him
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