Posted on 06/20/2011 1:47:15 PM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet
Typically, we think of the class bully as having low self-esteem, a kid with social phobias in need of an ego boost. Maybe we think bullies are mean as a way of acting out. But new research suggests that most aggressive behavior in children is actually not the result of psychological or social problems, but rather a desire to maintain one’s social position in the group. In fact, new studies reveal that most bullies actually have excellent self-esteem; the higher one’s social ranking in school, the more likely he/she is to have been involved in an aggressive incident. That’s right, if it’s true that being class president is just a popularity contest, then perhaps the class president is actually the class bully.
Since the victims of bullies commonly experience depression and social anxiety, this new data supports the implementation of anti-bullying programs in schools. These programs provide students with an environment where they can openly discuss the effects of aggressive behavior and learn conflict resolution skills from adults and peers.
The study collected data from 3,772 students across 19 middle and high schools. Students were asked to name five kids who had physically or verbally abused them, as well as five kids who they had picked on. The study revealed that the desire to achieve or maintain popularity was directly proportional with aggressive behavior. In fact, the more popular a student was, the more likely he/she had been involved in an aggressive situation. Based on the responses from children about their closest peer group, researchers studied how aggressive behavior effects cross-gender friendships, as well as the social networks at large.
On average, 33% of students had exhibited some form of aggressive behavior. Female students exhibited more hostility and placed more importance on social popularity, whereas males were more physically aggressive. In gender-segregated schools, the correlation between social status and aggression was even higher than in mixed gender schools.
Researchers believe administrators, teachers and parents need to work collaboratively to change the peer culture that encourages bullying. If you’re a parent of a school-aged child, it’s crucial to keep the lines of communication open so your child feels safe discussing peer dynamics, which will allow you to help combat aggressive behavior.
According to a recent study involving 5th and 6th graders, it’s not the bullies who are disliked by their classmates, but the kids being bullied.
Bullies may not be hurting inside but when you stand your ground and let them have it you find out 9 times out of 10 that they are just cowards projecting a false front.
Sounds like you attended the School of Hard Knocks.
I was pretty large and had fight for the right to be left alone. I did and my enemies eventually got the point.
However, these days fighting back against a bully is probably considered an aggressive action.
"Ooooo I love control"
http://www.paulgraham.com/nerds.html
An excellent treatment on the subject. Summed up... social heirarchy in schools are artificial in that they are “zero-sum” games. IOW’s one individual’s popularity often comes at the expense of anothers, rather like a royal court. Anyway, a great read!
“However, these days fighting back against a bully is probably considered an aggressive action.”
It is. Under “zero tolerance,” both the bully and the kid who defends him/herself are held equally accountable. The bully usually couldn’t care less about the school’s punishment, while the bullied kid usually does.
Real fair, eh?
The bullying /self-esteem uproar is a liberal tool to modify the behavior of the masses to their liking. City park and recreation departments across the country often do not keep score for young teams because the Marxist theorists don't like competion, not because they don't want to hurt someone's feelings. The bullies of multiculturalism and political correctness don't really care about the feelings of those involved, they just want to keep sensible people from calling a spade "a spade". If you step back and look, most of the liberal/leftist philosophies run counter to human nature - except when they are buttering the bread of those who support them.
Tax the rich to give to lazy bums. Be nice to countries and cultures who hate us and want to kill us and they will become our good buddies. Unilaterally disarm and no one will hate us or attack us. Raise taxes and increase regulation and expect a healthy recovery and a more economically productive country. Taking from citizens to finance more government spending improves the business climate and the economy. Government controlled healthcare will reduce healthcare costs. Profiling doesn't help catch terrorists. etc etc
Keep talking and writing good sense and we will finally shine a light on the evil that has slithered into our midst.
Of course. The bully always has his sycophants. And is always the one most in need of sycophants.
Actually, I think there is some merit in the zero tolerance policy.
It teaches kids at an early age that authority figures, adults, employers, supervisors, etc. simply can’t be trusted to have integrity and be fair, and that they are incapable of making even simple judgments on matters like these.
It’s a tough lesson, but fair or not, it is largely true. The sooner a kid learns that those charged with responsibility refuse to exercise it justly, the better.
“According to a recent study involving 5th and 6th graders, it’s not the bullies who are disliked by their classmates, but the kids being bullied.”
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This might be because their classmates are afraid what might happen to them if they are seen to ‘like’ the victims. By scorning the victims they may be trying to protect themselves by quietly aligning themselves with the bully.
Some bullies are abused children venting in public - doesn’t make it acceptable but explanable.
I have always noted that a ‘true’ bully is a coward that can be deflated with an aggressive response or ridicule that strikes deep.
However, I fear that some of these bullies are developing personality disorders which will become more obvious and even more damaging in adulthood. And yes, those types are rewarded because, from childhood, they have been crafting a false image of themselves that ‘plays well’ in the boardroom. They pose as tough, courageous, brave when they are not. They pretend that they know all the answers yet don’t bother to actually know the answers (e.g., they won’t prepare, study, extend their knowledge unless forced to do so).
Obama is a ‘wanna be’ bully. Failed at it but still poses as one. The ‘I won’ answer he gave to repubs - he studied that from bullies that terrified him. He was a ‘classmate’ who learned to dump hostility on victims around him, to protect himself from bullies, until he got older - and learned that in politics it works better if you pretend to care about the victims. So that’s why he became a community organizer. Because he failed at being a bully.
I dunno - it’s kind of a trait of the middle manager too, if you know what I mean. Saying it’s a sign of low self esteem is like saying rape is not about sex. Sure, it’s about other things too, in fact it’s an extreme form of bullying, but... it’s about sex.
You make an excellent point!
Job 40:12
Look at every proud man and humble him, crush the wicked where they stand.
Sounds like your daughter could use a spanking or three with all that hubris she has going on in that head of hers.
That function being?
Zero tolerance policies would work great in our criminal justice system, too!
Just think about it! When the victim fights back against the bully, tyrant, thug, criminal, etc. you just consider both parties guilty and throw them both in jail!
Zero tolerance towards violence helps every one. ;)
In some communities and schools, the bullies are gang members and future (if not present) career criminals. In situations like that, telling kids to “fight back” can be dangerous. It’s much better to get kids out of that environment and home-school them if possible. Also, there is a huge variation in physical size and strength among kids, esp. at the middle school level; kids who are bullied are likely to be small for their age. Unless they are highly skilled at martial arts, they don’t really have a chance in a fight. In my middle school, the bullies were often goons who had been held back 2 grades or more, so they were much larger than anyone else in the class.
awesome. what movie is that from? :-)
I think bullying is a result of our cultural choice to separate children from adults when they develop. In more apprenticeship-type environments, bullying is never done by the younger person.
When you separate children into age groups, attention-getting and dominance behavior appears. Without older people around, bullies can gain status easily.
I believe that the great age-separated, public school experiment, that has been going on for quite a while now, will one day be laughed at.
Bullies these days are also more likely to escalate from beating a kid up to crippling or killing him/her. That’s why the adults in the schools HAVE to impose justice. But they won’t because they’re largely bullies and cowards (aka union leftscum), too.
If I had kids, I’d homeschool...
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