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A glimpse into the next GOP administration (Proof "progressivism" is a disease)
The Waterloo/Cedar Falls Courier ^ | July 11, 2010 | Scott Cawelti

Posted on 07/11/2010 12:14:14 PM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet

I don't mean to brag, but over the years some of my public predictions have actually come true. I saw the first O.J. Simpson verdict (not guilty) coming, as I did Barack Obama's election some six months before it happened.

Recently I made a large bet with a conservative friend that global warming is real, and man made, and we will know it (sadly) in 10 years.

Actually, we know it now, but he won't pay off until more proof comes in. Easiest money I will ever make.

So listen up.

It's July 2013. The new Republican administration has been in power now for some seven months, and talk about change. No hope, just change.

I'm watching it all happen from outside of Stockholm, Sweden, where I've emigrated with family and friends. Swedes are quite happy with the influx of Americans who abandoned all hope when the tea partiers took over.

A few good riddances made us happy to move, and the Swedes' booming economy, superb health care and superior educational system offer so many advantages we may never return.

Swedes actually consider us American immigrants to be conservatives.

We refer to the new administration as "cons" because that's what they are, and do.

Three major shifts in policy have dominated since President Sarah Palin and Vice President Glenn Beck took the reins of power. A national preoccupation with weeping at the drop of a hat accompanied these shifts, something Vice President Beck heartily endorses.

"We've taken back our country!" he blubbers.

Those three policy changes:

1. Abortion is now illegal everywhere in America, thanks to a huge and successful push by anti-abortionists. Roe v. Wade is history, and airlines are reaping the benefits of thousands of new passengers on quick round trip flights. "Another benefit of our new law!" President Palin announces.

The prison business has never been better; special low-security prisons have been built in every state for doctors, fathers and mothers, all of whom are now considered criminals for either having an abortion, attempting to get one, or aiding and abetting anyone associated with the murder of fetuses.

At last, say the anti-abortionists, who are happy to take over control of mothers' bodies the day after conception.

2. Evolution must now be taught as a remotely possible theory, mostly for stuffy scientists and intellectuals who still believe it. Now "intelligent design" is taught in grade school through college, and the president and vice-president wept in unison as they announced that American schools are now in tune with our national faith in God as the recent creator. Darwin no longer gets mentioned in polite company.

Needless to say, most scientists have left America and now reside in Asia, Europe and Canada. Good riddance, say the tea party Republicans, which is now all Republicans.

3. Finally, after their grand announcement of having taken back our country, President Palin, V.P. Beck, Secretary of State Nikki Haley and Secretary of Defense Rush Limbaugh declared the end of the Afghanistan war and pulled out all Americans, effective immediately after inauguration.

"Let them stew in their own juices," declared Limbaugh and Haley in unison, to cheers from everyone, including the Taliban and al-Qaida.

President Palin insists that this act alone will save enough to lower the deficit to Clinton administration levels. When asked about terrorists taking over both Iraq and Afghanistan, President Palin explains that God will take care of them, and us.

I'm learning to say, "I told you so," in Swedish, and Swedes know enough English to know what it means.

Finally, yet another unforeseen benefit: Immigrants to America are now as rare as geologists and stem cell researchers.

All in all, it's a newly taken back America. The Europeans, meanwhile, are merely taken aback. And to think it's only three years away.


TOPICS: Government; Health/Medicine; Military/Veterans; Politics
KEYWORDS: 2012; abortion; glennbeck; globalwarming; obama; palin; prolife; rushlimbaugh; sarahpalin; talkradio
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They give people like this a column? I think San Francisco's Mark Morford has a cousin in Waterloo, Iowa!
1 posted on 07/11/2010 12:14:15 PM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

Sweden wouldn’t take in these lazy American leftists.


2 posted on 07/11/2010 12:18:23 PM PDT by Gapplega
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
Recently I made a large bet with a conservative friend that global warming is real, and man made, and we will know it (sadly) in 10 years.

Actually, Scott is half right. Global Warming is part of a cycle, so it DOES happen. It will be warmer in 10 years, if you're looking at the typical sunspot cycle. However, if we remain in the sunspot minimum that we are in now, and have been in for the last two years, the climate may NOT be warm again, and may actually be much cooler than normal in ten years time.

There is NO evidence that humans cause Global Warming, or Climate Change, or whatever the environmental buzz word is right now. Humans do not have the capacity to change the climate of the entire earth. To even imagine that we have more power than the Sun has is ludicrous.

3 posted on 07/11/2010 12:20:17 PM PDT by SuziQ
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

“And to think it’s only three years away.”.......................................... OK!!!! Lets take him up on it. Surely he will give us at least 20-1 odds, because he knows the outcome. Maybe this guy is their version of Semmens? It could also be satire.


4 posted on 07/11/2010 12:20:28 PM PDT by Bringbackthedraft (As Americans we must think We the People, not we the Party.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
I'm watching it all happen from outside of Stockholm, Sweden, where I've emigrated with family and friends. Swedes are quite happy with the influx of Americans who abandoned all hope when the tea partiers took over.

Riiight! Just like Alec Baldwin and Barbra Streisand moved to France when George W. Bush was elected.

5 posted on 07/11/2010 12:21:37 PM PDT by SuziQ
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

I hadn’t realized they legalized marijuana in Iowa.


6 posted on 07/11/2010 12:22:10 PM PDT by SilverKing88
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To: SuziQ

It will be warmer in 10 years, if you’re looking at the typical sunspot cycle. .................................... Now you tell me, I just bought 6 Fox Tail Palms to replace the ones that I lost here, in southern sunny FLA., to the frost last winter. :o(


7 posted on 07/11/2010 12:23:01 PM PDT by Bringbackthedraft (As Americans we must think We the People, not we the Party.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

Bad drugs + botched lobotomy = this column. Sad.


8 posted on 07/11/2010 12:25:00 PM PDT by JPG (Mr. Gore, or is it Mr. Stone or Mr. Woody? Whatever, you're under arrest.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

9 posted on 07/11/2010 12:26:44 PM PDT by Oceander (The Price of Freedom is Eternal Vigilance -- Thos. Jefferson)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

Is he still taking money on this globull warming bet? I’d like to get in on the action, certainly easy money there, as this is going to go down the same path as the world is freezing, overpopulated, no place to put garbage, etc crud that’s been floated before.

I betcha he recycles too.


10 posted on 07/11/2010 12:27:09 PM PDT by kingu (Favorite Sticker: Lost hope, and Obama took my change.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
I guess this is why he's working in the dead-tree, dried-ink, antique media.

What a maroon

11 posted on 07/11/2010 12:27:14 PM PDT by muir_redwoods (Obama. Chauncey Gardiner without the homburg.)
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To: Bringbackthedraft

I’m all geared up to raise at least $2 million dollars for Governor Palin if she runs.


12 posted on 07/11/2010 12:28:04 PM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet (Don't care if he was born in a manger on July 4th! A "Natural Born" citizen requires two US parents!)
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To: Bringbackthedraft

Easiest money for who?


13 posted on 07/11/2010 12:29:06 PM PDT by BenKenobi (I want to hear more about Sam! Samwise the stouthearted!)
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To: SuziQ

Right you are. If conservatives do take over the reins of government in 2012-2013 you won’t be able to pay these soft and pampered leftists enough to leave the country. And the writer’s surely facetious (they aren’t facetious?) predictions will not come to pass.


14 posted on 07/11/2010 12:30:56 PM PDT by luvbach1 (Stop Barry now. He can't help himself.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
Recently I made a large bet with a conservative friend that global warming is real, and man made, and we will know it (sadly) in 10 years.

Actually, we know it now, but he won't pay off until more proof comes in. Easiest money I will ever make.

So listen up.

Listen to one more word of your rambling moronic claptrap ... I'd rather be lit on fire.


15 posted on 07/11/2010 12:33:01 PM PDT by tx_eggman (Liberalism is only possible in that moment when a man chooses Barabas over Christ.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

I’ll go him one better: It is late 2011 and the Democratic party has suffered a devastating election defeat. Lame-duck President Obama broods in the White House. Over the past four years, he has installed his men in command of the military; his agents are a majority on the Supreme Court; he has fostered a nation-wide union of police and public safety officials who derive their pay and benefits from his benevolent hand. He picks up the phone and makes a call. Within days, the Republic president-elect is arrested and leading members of the Republican party are in jail; his commanders order the armed forces to stand down as Obama’s national police fan out and batter public demonstrations into submission while collecting registered weapons and killing those who resist; thanks to financial reforms passed under Obama’s watch, he shuts down the banks; he pulls the “kill switch” on the internet and his CIA and NSA flunkies turn their attention to surveilling U.S. “traitors.” The Congress rubber-stamps his declaration of emergency measures, and the hand-picked judges declare his actions “constitutional.” The FCC shuts down all media dissent, while the mainstream media hails his decisive handling of the emergency. The American republic is dead; Emperor Barack I now reigns.


16 posted on 07/11/2010 12:33:11 PM PDT by Hootowl
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To: SilverKing88

Marijuana cannot create this level of delusion - and I speak from long-ago but extensive experience. I’m thinking crystal meth (with which I have no experience but have seen its wrath). On the other hand, Liberals routinely twist themselves into logical pretzels to explain away obvious realities that discomfort them, no pharmaceutical assistance required.


17 posted on 07/11/2010 12:34:31 PM PDT by andy58-in-nh (America does not need to be organized: it needs to be liberated.)
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To: 2ndDivisionVet

Retarded imagination with a couple of connections double tapped.


18 posted on 07/11/2010 12:35:47 PM PDT by DefeatCorruption
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To: 2ndDivisionVet
So this liberal bet against Al Gore?
19 posted on 07/11/2010 12:36:59 PM PDT by Colonel_Flagg (No apologies.)
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To: Hootowl

What Good Can a Handgun Do Against An Army?
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-backroom/2312894/posts


20 posted on 07/11/2010 12:40:52 PM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet (Don't care if he was born in a manger on July 4th! A "Natural Born" citizen requires two US parents!)
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