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1 posted on 06/14/2010 1:48:57 PM PDT by savedbygrace
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To: savedbygrace

Read Psalm 34


45 posted on 06/14/2010 2:05:55 PM PDT by DarthVader (That which supports Barack Hussein Obama must be sterilized and there are NO exceptions!)
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To: savedbygrace

If you say it is your fault...then change those things about yourself...make everyday a living amends and good things will follow. What you will get may not be what you want it to be right now, but I promise, your life will change.


46 posted on 06/14/2010 2:06:39 PM PDT by Hildy
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To: savedbygrace
I'm a born again, spirit filled Christian, so I'll respond more readily to Christian-based advice and counsel, but I'm ready to accept whatever you have for me.

I am curious - does your wife claim to be a born-again believer as well?

We obviously don't have most of the important details, and I guess we really don't need it. God's word is clear about His view of marriage. And while He did make allowances for sinful man (who would divorce anyway, with or without His allowing it), God's purpose and plan for us all is a spirit of reconciliation.

That being said, obviously a split up marriage is an indication of some sort of failure. But at this point, it may all be beyond your ability to do anything directly to put it back together. So you must rely upon our Heavenly Father to either repair the divide, or to give the comfort and peace needed. But He also, I believe, would want you to learn from whatever mistakes or decisions may have contributed to this situation.

I will be praying for you and your whole family...

47 posted on 06/14/2010 2:08:00 PM PDT by TheBattman (They exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature...)
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To: savedbygrace

Get over it. It always takes two to tango. Women up and split all the time anymore, thee’s nothing to keep them on the farm. So thank the Lord for the good times you had, and the good times to come.


48 posted on 06/14/2010 2:08:02 PM PDT by DaxtonBrown (HARRY: Money Mob & Influence (Expose on Reid on amazon.com written by me!))
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To: savedbygrace
Having been through this twice (first time no warning; second time the marriage was difficult to bear, but there were two young children involved), I strongly suggest you go to amazon.com now and order "Rebuilding When Your Relationship Ends." When you get the book, start working the program. I see there's a workbook that now accompanies the book -- it's probably worth getting. http://www.amazon.com/When-Your-Relationship-Bruce-Fisher/dp/1886230692/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1276548976&sr=1-1 The Catholic Church used to, and I'm assuming they still do, sponsor a program for divorced folks called New Beginnings, or something like that. It's a retreat, highly emotional, and very much worth while. If you are not Catholic (I'm not), do not allow the Church's sponsorship to prevent you from seeking this program out. There will be no attempt to force Catholicism on you, you will find out much about yourself, and you will meet great people who have suffered a fate similar to yours and are surviving. Also, get a good lawyer, and make sure you hire a court reporter each time you appear in court. Good healing.
51 posted on 06/14/2010 2:08:42 PM PDT by skookum55 (A natural-born US citizen since 1955.)
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To: savedbygrace

You are not broken, just dented. Been through it also.
It is better on this side. Do not dwell on the what was, look forward to the what is coming. Learn from your mistakes so you can leave your baggage behind. Do not have a new relationship for at least one year. You need to become yourself, not just someone’s husband or dad. If there is to be another person in your future, God will send them otherwise learn to appreciate yourself and your freedom. I do.


52 posted on 06/14/2010 2:09:22 PM PDT by The Shadow Knows
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To: savedbygrace
Within three weeks, I will be alone, with only my Golden Retriever as a companion.

It may not seem like it now, but you got the best part of the deal. Also heed the advice of those who tell you to get a good lawyer and protect your assets. Being Mr. Nice Guy will just bring you more grief. If you are the one leaving home get a legal separation first, otherwise she'll claim you abandoned her.

If this were an amicable breakup, I'd say otherwise, but that doesn't seem to be the case.

53 posted on 06/14/2010 2:09:24 PM PDT by Moonman62 (The issue of whether cheap labor makes America great should have been settled by the Civil War.)
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To: savedbygrace

Probably best to keep a close eye on the dog.


54 posted on 06/14/2010 2:10:21 PM PDT by UncleSam
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To: savedbygrace

Sorry, man. That sucks. I’m unfortunately low on advice for such a situation.

Read the Book of Job — my favorite book of the Bible, by the way — and stay strong. Job took a beating, but stood fast, and was rewarded in the end. There is a reason for everything. The night is always darkest just before the dawn.

Godspeed, good man.

SnakeDoc


55 posted on 06/14/2010 2:11:03 PM PDT by SnakeDoctor ("Shut it down" ... 00:00:03 ... 00:00:02 ... 00:00:01 ... 00:00:00.)
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To: savedbygrace

HE brought you to it...HE will see you through it.


57 posted on 06/14/2010 2:12:08 PM PDT by stylin19a (Never buy a putter until you first get a chance to throw it)
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To: savedbygrace

In the end, you’ll be OK.

But this is the moment, deep down in your heart of hearts that you know that O.J. Simpson did it.

The best revenge is to live well.


58 posted on 06/14/2010 2:12:46 PM PDT by Ouderkirk (Democrats...the party of Slavery, Segregation, Sodomy, and Sedition)
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To: savedbygrace

Prayers for you, I can sympathize...


59 posted on 06/14/2010 2:12:59 PM PDT by fieldmarshaldj (~"This is what happens when you find a stranger in the Amber Lamps !"~~)
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To: savedbygrace

go get “the love dare” and do it.


62 posted on 06/14/2010 2:17:31 PM PDT by dubie (The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants.)
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To: savedbygrace
My father in law is alone. My MIL went out shopping a couple of years ago with a friend and disappeared. The two weren't found for six months. They had driven into a dry creek bed on an unused farm and expired due to exposure.

He was devastated. She was a minister and they were very active in church. They did everything together.

In the past two years he has had a transformation. He is out dating several women, travels alot, taken up new hobbies and is as bright and happy as could be. Of course he still has somber times but he has not just moved forward but has raced to the front.

Kind of like blues music. It is sad but it makes you happy.

Anyway, you'll have some down time but use it for introspection and think about the things that have made you happy these past few years.

Then go out and get some life!

63 posted on 06/14/2010 2:18:52 PM PDT by Bartholomew Roberts
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To: savedbygrace
For now, give yourself time to heal(from wifie), and enjoy your companion(woofie)

Then, when the time comes, find yourself a good women....

...then throw the TV out the window.

(No, I'm not kidding)

64 posted on 06/14/2010 2:20:15 PM PDT by RckyRaCoCo
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To: savedbygrace

Whatever you do, don’t play the hang-dog and give her everything. I’ve never met a divorced person who said, later, “I wish I had given him/her everything they wanted.” Instead, they regret not fighting for half of the house or whatever.

There’s a spiritual side to this where you must depend on God for comfort and direction, but there’s another side where you’ll have to make decisions about who gets what, parental visitation and so on. If you don’t feel you’re up to fighting for what is yours’, get an attorney who will do it for you.


65 posted on 06/14/2010 2:20:37 PM PDT by ChocChipCookie (God to Obama: Don't think I'm not keepin' track. Brother.)
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To: savedbygrace

I’m not sure you’re in the best position to determine, without forewarning, who did what to whom - or who caused what. Not at this point at any rate.

Without warning implies no counselling occurred, or is going to occur.

It isn’t over until the divorce papers are signed, and even then there’s ‘buyer’s remorse’ on the divorce and people end up being remarried.

Unless she’s dead, nothing is over until you’ve exhausted either your options or yourselves.

This sounds like it just happened. I’d go to a counsellor by yourself to start, and then see whether she’d be up to going sometime soon down the road.

My 2 cents at least. Keep praying is the other advice. I’d pray NOT for what you want, but for God to reveal His will and to give you the courage to carry it out.


66 posted on 06/14/2010 2:21:17 PM PDT by RinaseaofDs
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To: savedbygrace

The Golden is great news ... far less troublesome than a woman...

Try my attorney ,, he’s good .. the youtube link is a testimonial from one of his clients.

www.bettercallsaul.com

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M4LYA_bQJNg


67 posted on 06/14/2010 2:21:27 PM PDT by Neidermeyer
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To: savedbygrace

Had you made a gratitude list of the 10 things you were most grateful for last week, I’m certain you’re wife would have been one of the 10. Now that she’s decided to leave, focus on the other 9 items on the list.

Look at your feet, and the floor under them often. THAT is where you are. Do everything you can to live in the present moment. Not even God can change the past, and He has not revealed the future yet. Communicate with Him often.

Find something that interests you that involves working with others. Often when I feel that my life couldn’t get any worse, I listen to, then share my experience strength and hope with others who have it FAR worse than myself.

Having Faith means never having to ask why....

See my tagline


69 posted on 06/14/2010 2:21:52 PM PDT by highnoon (Not all miracles are gift-wrapped....)
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To: savedbygrace

Go be of service. WHatever it is, find a purpose. Get involved in something. Animal shelter, homeless shelter, old-folks home, etc. STAY OUT OF YOUR HEAD. Get active in your local church - one that has a lot of activities. Wednesday Bible study.

Don’t self indulge. That is what the enemy wants. In Christ we can walk thru ANYTHING. Other people will let us down. He will not.

Ask your estranged wife what you can do to help her. Do NOT have hate in your heart for her. Pray that she may find the Lord and peace and happiness. She obviously has neither at this moment. Her’s is the sad story here. She is still searching. She is the one who is being tormented.

You will come out better on the other side of this. Peace Brother.

(Also consider rescuing a companion for your Golden. The antics of multiple dogs will bring you cheer, and they will keep each other company while you are out being of service).


70 posted on 06/14/2010 2:22:45 PM PDT by Retired Greyhound
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