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Zombie attacks might increase due to global warming, study shows
http://wmbriggs.com/blog/2008/01/31/zombie-attacks-might-increase-due-to-global-warming-study-shows/ ^
| William M Briggs
Posted on 01/31/2008 3:36:33 PM PST by mattstat
A new study by scientists has suggested that zombie attacks might increase if the current projections of global warming are realized. If the earth gets warmer, it means longer springs, summers, and falls, and shorter winters, said John Carpenter-Romero, Ph.D., a zombie-ologist who co-authored the study. And shorter winters means more time for the undead to prey on the populace.
Dr. Harrister, the other co-author, and head of Zombie Robotics at Wayward Robot, Inc., explained that cold winters typically stalled the walking dead. It is well known that zombies cant operate in cold weather. It freezes their brains.
The pair calculated a 32.782412% increase in zombie attacks if CO2 increased to twice its pre-industrial rate. Clearly, this is a very troubling result, said Dr. Harrister, If we dont do something soon, the streets will be filled with blood.
TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: allyourzotrbelong2us; callingartbell; globalwarming; molassesmiasma; monkeyfacerules; undead; undeadthread; zombies; zotemifyougotem
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To: darkangel82; Dead Corpse
621
posted on
02/07/2008 1:37:55 PM PST
by
sionnsar
(trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
To: Monkey Face
Yes, the catz were fast asleep during the Great Snake Escape. I’ve put the History of the Catholic Church in Alaska on the screen - she’ll never move that!
622
posted on
02/07/2008 1:44:15 PM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Political zombies need brains, but they hunger only for taxes." ~ NicknamedBob)
To: Tax-chick
That ought to make her hiss...
623
posted on
02/07/2008 2:10:06 PM PST
by
rottndog
(This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
To: Tax-chick
Ive put the History of the Catholic Church in Alaska on the screen - shell never move that! They have a history state by state?
624
posted on
02/07/2008 2:57:28 PM PST
by
Harmless Teddy Bear
(A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes into it.)
To: Harmless Teddy Bear
They have a history state by state? No, nothing official. Often a diocese or archdiocese will have a history written. We have one from Tulsa, and the Diocese of Charlotte has recently published a history which we don't own. (Waiting for the deep discounts :-).
The history of Alaska is an encyclopedia of *everything* regarding the Catholic Church in the state of Alaska. It was compiled by a Jesuit missionary with, iirc, over 50 years experience in Alaska. I bought it for myself for my birthday last year, and it's very big and heavy.
625
posted on
02/07/2008 4:16:54 PM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Political zombies need brains, but they hunger only for taxes." ~ NicknamedBob)
To: Tax-chick
Well, good night, Undead! Made it through the day of Scouting, worked on all the new Spanish music, drank a small restorative (Californian), and now it’s time to retire.
Good Catz to all, and no snake escapes during a good night!
626
posted on
02/07/2008 6:58:33 PM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Political zombies need brains, but they hunger only for taxes." ~ NicknamedBob)
To: Tax-chick
Good night. Sounds like you had a productive day.
627
posted on
02/07/2008 7:53:29 PM PST
by
darkangel82
(If you're not part of the solution, you are part of the problem. (Say no to RINOs))
To: darkangel82
628
posted on
02/08/2008 12:08:52 AM PST
by
rottndog
(This tagline currently closed for maintenance and rehabilitation.)
To: rottndog
First post in Eastern Standard. Good morning, Undead!
629
posted on
02/08/2008 3:14:58 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Political zombies need brains, but they hunger only for taxes." ~ NicknamedBob)
To: Tax-chick; rottndog
I’m thinking we should draft Thomas Sowell for President. Then J. C. Watts for Veep.
The “Sowell-Watts” platform.
.
Works for me.
630
posted on
02/08/2008 4:54:40 AM PST
by
NicknamedBob
(John McCain's word processor has Italics ON all the time. Otherwise everything comes out leftward.)
To: NicknamedBob
The Sowell-Watts platform. Thomas Sowell is a cranky old coot. He'd be a fun President.
631
posted on
02/08/2008 4:56:02 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Political zombies need brains, but they hunger only for taxes." ~ NicknamedBob)
To: Tax-chick; Kolokotronis
I'm hurt.
"Thomas Sowell is a cranky old coot."
You say that like it's a bad thing. Us cranky old coots have to stick together.
Ask K.
632
posted on
02/08/2008 5:00:59 AM PST
by
NicknamedBob
(John McCain's word processor has Italics ON all the time. Otherwise everything comes out leftward.)
To: NicknamedBob; Kolokotronis; Frank Sheed
"Thomas Sowell is a cranky old coot." You say that like it's a bad thing.
I was making a positive statement about Dr. Sowell, America's greatest living intellectual. Sorry about the misunderstanding: I should have used a different font.
633
posted on
02/08/2008 5:03:48 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Political zombies need brains, but they hunger only for taxes." ~ NicknamedBob)
To: Tax-chick
No, you said it properly.
I deliberately misread it to make the point that I too am a cranky old coot, just not as lovable as he.
634
posted on
02/08/2008 5:16:49 AM PST
by
NicknamedBob
(John McCain's word processor has Italics ON all the time. Otherwise everything comes out leftward.)
To: NicknamedBob
I knew you were a cranky old coot, Bob, and I think you’re more lovable than Thomas Sowell! (One always has to be a little dubious about economists ...)
635
posted on
02/08/2008 5:30:03 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Political zombies need brains, but they hunger only for taxes." ~ NicknamedBob)
To: sionnsar
Sorry, I'm not here right now. I will have been here later after I leave for my trip to the past.
636
posted on
02/08/2008 6:27:25 AM PST
by
Dead Corpse
(What would a free man do?)
To: NicknamedBob; Tax-chick
“”Thomas Sowell is a cranky old coot.”
You say that like it’s a bad thing. Us cranky old coots have to stick together.
Ask K.”
Ha! You are sooooooooo right. Which puts me in mind of an incident the other day. I am on the board of a railroad. We were giving some instructions to the COO of the road about dealing with a particularly difficult government official. She commented that she didn’t want to be seen as a “crank” to which two Board members immediately replied, “K’s a crank and we all love and respect him!”
637
posted on
02/08/2008 6:38:12 AM PST
by
Kolokotronis
(Christ is Risen, and you, o death, are annihilated!)
To: Dead Corpse
Sounds like my day at work ‘yesterday’ my time..
638
posted on
02/08/2008 6:39:53 AM PST
by
Darksheare
(Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
To: Kolokotronis; NicknamedBob; Tax-chick
Our night maintenance guy is actively TRYING to get fired
(He’s had enough of the site and their game playing.)
Problem is.. his zany commentary and jokes have people saying, “We gotta keep this guy!” instead.
639
posted on
02/08/2008 6:42:22 AM PST
by
Darksheare
(Do you or anyone you know suffer from Bunny on the Head?)
To: Kolokotronis; NicknamedBob
She commented that she didnt want to be seen as a crank It's harder for ladies to be cranks, what with the social expectations and the wardrobe complexities.
640
posted on
02/08/2008 6:45:07 AM PST
by
Tax-chick
("Political zombies need brains, but they hunger only for taxes." ~ NicknamedBob)
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