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DUmmie FUnnies 02-17-05 ("Bush Bi?")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | February 17, 2005 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 02/17/2005 6:47:51 PM PST by PJ-Comix

Thanx to my trusty Indian Scout in Dummieland, I was forwarded this absolutely HILARIOUS DUmmie THREAD titled, “Bush Bi? Can anyone shed any light on this one?” And what is the basis for this shocking allegation? Absolutely nothing more than speculation on a tripod website that claims that an unnamed Las Vegas woman somehow knows that George W. Bush had bisexual affair. You can go to that tripod site from this DUmmie thread for yourself but I assure you it will not enlighten you a bit because even though it seems to be written in English, it is absolutely impossible to interpret what was written. I sure hope the DUmmies don’t talk to an unnamed Reno woman who once talked to someone who has a second cousin who knew a dairy cow that claimed she had carnal relations with YOURS TRULY. It would absolutely destroy me if the DUmmies found this “evidence” of bestiality on the part of the author of the DUmmie FUnnies. As usual the wild DUmmie speculations are in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, yearning for the tenderness of Daisy the Cow, is in the [brackets]:

This is verrrrr interesting

[Would you mind interpreting what that website actually said into something that is even faintly comprehensible?]

not that interesting, actually since there was not a shred of evidence that bush had sex with guckert as the article tried so hard to imply. only the supposition that if you have one guy who might be gay in an organisation then the whole orgainsiation must be somehow controlled by gays. just what is it with these gay conspiracy theories? this is all starting to sound like the 'protocols of the learned elders of zion.' do you really believe that there is some kind of 'homintern' (as joe mccarthy called it) controlling the white house? i'm getting really tired of this obsession with hidden gays somehow controlling the world; it's starting to feel very paranoid and freeperish. the last time i heard so many people snickering about gays and thinking that they could somehow discredit someone by calling him 'gay' i was in high-school.

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!! However, thanx for making us aware of that term, “hominterm.” I think I shall file it away for future use.]

You know about poppy's scandal with orphaned child prostitutes thought right?

[Common knowledge but you forgot to mention Bush’s affair with an adopted transsexual goat.]

Also, there are rumors that you have to commit a homosexual act to become an Initiate of the Skull and Bones society at Yale.

[You mean Bush dated John Kerry?]

commit a homosexual act...that makes it sound like a felony

[The ironic thing is that the DUmmies who frequently slam the “homophobia” of the EVIL Republicans have been calling for the arrest of gay conservatives for, well, being gay.]

It is a felony only if you are using a cell phone at the same time.

[LOL! Good one! Since you’ve shown a good sense of humor that makes me suspect that you are a LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

I'm sure there might be more than one secret society that requires what some would call "unseemly" acts as part of their initiation.

[The Homer Simpson Fan Club requires that you commit an unspeakable act with Troy McClure’s goldfish.]

the atmosphere here is starting to get very tin-hatty and freeperish and very weirdly fixated on tittle-tattle about unmasking 'hidden gays'. i just went to the linked site and it reads like its been put together by someone who's either forgotten to take their meds or who has been doing WAY too much crystal meth for far too long. honestly, does anyone really think that bush is gay? is calling him gay somehow going to help defeat the right? do you really think that will have any resonance with the anyone, outside a very few lunatic homophobes?

[LOUSY FREEPER TROLL!!!]

that was my initial reaction. It looked loopty loop but I was shocked at how many google hits. Bush and that other guy got. I could give a rats ass if he's gay, bi, or straight. It's the hyprocritical nature that has my interest, and then only slightly. Just wondering if the Gannon thing is closer to Bush than it appears now. Could Gannon be to Bush what Lewinsky was to Clinton?

[Could the Three Little Pigs be trisexual?]

i'm getting tired of all the weirdly gleeful assertionms that anyone we don't like is 'gay.' i'm seeing a vein of homophobia on this site that is quite surprising and disappointing.

[Suddenly the DUmmies are calling for the arrest of gays for….being gay.]

It isn't that they are Gay, it is their lying about being Gay while destroying the lives of others like themselves. They have no right to a clean, well-lit closet when they use "Gay Marriage" as a club to keep the Christian Right in line. I am a Queer. I want to hang these people (figuratively) from the highest tree in the land by their closeted homosexuality.

[Queer Eye for the DUmmie Guy.]

IF it's true, IT'S VERY EXPLOSIVE & IF LINKED TO GANNON IT'S WORSE. Well, Well, Well. ISN'T THIS INTERESTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hopefully, we'll find a connection with Gannon. Time will tell the story. Waiting for the IMPEACHMENT WHILE THE SCANDALS KEEP UNFOLDING

[Methinks you will be WAITING until Jan. 20, 2009.]

Sure, anything is possible... but without incriminating pics, the story is a worthless waste of time...

[Since there is an accusation that means there MUST be something to this story. The utter lack of proof that Bush is Bi means there is a massive Rovian coverup going on.]

Remember Bob Stevens of the Enquirer? You remember...He was the first one that died of anthrax after 911? Well sources tell me he had the pictures...that is why he was taken out.

[Hi Andy Stephenson! Was one of those “sources” Bev Harris, the con artist that you used to work with?]

And note that they "Decontaminated" the Enquirer office...And the evidence was gone forever.

[The long tentacles of the Perfect Rovian Storm know no bounds.]

Why Bush is evil! Why Bush is dumb! Why Bush can't string two words together! It's because he's GAY! We should have known all along! It's the only plausible explanation!

[Check his ranch for Judy Garland albums. That will be the ULTIMATE proof!]

If he *is* Gay, and I believe this, it discredits him with the Religionists who, along with Diebold, put him into office. I am hoping to motivate these people to remove him from office by whatever means makes most sense to them.

[“Hello, Jerry Falwell? I’m calling all Fundies that I normally despise to tell them that Bush is gay so could you maybe, um, impeach him?”]

Yes, nothing would get him tossed on the refuse pile faster than proof of homosexuality.

[Does he watch the Oscars? Chris Rock claims that is solid proof that you’re gay.]

With Bush, if it's true, he's a total fraud and hypocrite and destorying lives and this country because of the bigotry. Yet here Bush IS doing illegal crimes in this country and taking away ammendment rights and nobody who holds the power seems to care. So maybe the only way to show them the light is if this was true and could prove it.

[Hey! Remember that scene in “Liar Liar” where some woman figured out that a witness was gay because he knew all about women’s shoes? It was because only gay guys know the different styles of women’s shoes. I say flash pictures of different women’s shoes in front of Bush and if he shows the slightest trace of disgust at the unstylish shoes then that means he is gay…and grounds for IMPEACHMENT.]

There just has to be a way that we can do something with this story to expose the players.

[Just try making it up as you have been doing.]

Maybe the person at AmericaBlog doesn't know about this? Has anybody Emailed them personally and told about this woman? Maybe he/she can get to them?

[I’ve talked to that unnamed Las Vegas woman. She has told me she is just $10 away from exposing that Bush is gay. So send in your money and send it in care of Bev Harris.]

Lanny Davis, a longtime Democratic attorney and former counsel to Bill Clinton, was also a classmate of George Bush's at Yale. He tells this anecdote today in the LA Times: One of my most vivid memories is this: A few of us were in the common room one night. It was 1965, I believe — my junior year, his sophomore. We were making our usual sarcastic commentaries on those who walked by us. A little nasty perhaps, but always with a touch of humor. On this occasion, however, someone we all believed to be gay walked by, although the word we used in those days was "queer." Someone, I'm sorry to say, snidely used that word as he walked by. George heard it and, most uncharacteristically, snapped: "Shut up." Then he said, in words I can remember almost verbatim: "Why don't you try walking in his shoes for a while and see how it feels before you make a comment like that?"

[GASP! That settles it. Bush MUST be gay!!! This is as solid proof as catching him listening to Johnny Mathis while watching the Oscars.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: du; dummiefunnies; dummies; homophobicdummies; itsjustaboutsex
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For any of you with the urge to sprain your finger on the Abuse Button based strictly on the title of this DUFU edition, I strongly URGE you to READ this edition first. Otherwise you will cause many of your fellow Freepers to miss out on this HILARIOUS speculation by the DUmmies.

Well, I still haven't heard from Jeff Kleinman of the Graybill and English Literary Agency yet today but since there are still a couple of hours left in the day I am highly optimistic. Oh, and if you are Jeff Kleinman (or another Literary Agent who wants in on the HOTTEST book deal of the 21st Century) then you can contact me at: PJ-Comix.

Let me know if you want on the DUmmie FUnnies PING List.

1 posted on 02/17/2005 6:47:54 PM PST by PJ-Comix
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To: PJ-Comix

1


2 posted on 02/17/2005 6:49:08 PM PST by franksolich (Gud signe var konge god)
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


3 posted on 02/17/2005 6:49:34 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

If Bush were truly "bi", the left would be tripping over themselves to kiss his arse.


4 posted on 02/17/2005 6:50:43 PM PST by ViLaLuz
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To: ViLaLuz

Dan Rather will cover the story. Even if the witness is a liar, well, it COULD have happened....


5 posted on 02/17/2005 6:52:00 PM PST by Swanks
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To: franksolich

I cannot imagine what in Hades it takes to please the DUmmies; here we have a president, George Bush, emulating the best of their Democratic presidents (Woodrow Wilson, in self-determination of peoples; Franklin Roosevelt, in vast enormous expensive social-welfare programs; Harry Truman, in coming back from the jaws of defeat; John Kennedy in "pay any price, bear any burden," so that others may be free; Lyndon Johnson, in vast enormous expensive social-welfare programs.....)

He is a resurrection of their best Democratic presidents; how can a DUmmie NOT like George Bush, especially if he is fond of Wilson, Roosevelt, Truman, &c., &c., &c.?

And with this new DUmmie "revelation" that George Bush is gay, hey, they should be smothering George Bush with kisses and hugs and warm affection.

I just cannot figure it out. What does George Bush have to do, to please the DUmmies?


6 posted on 02/17/2005 6:59:03 PM PST by franksolich (Gud signe var konge god)
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To: PJ-Comix
On this occasion, however, someone we all believed to be gay walked by, although the word we used in those days was "queer." Someone, I'm sorry to say, snidely used that word as he walked by. George heard it and, most uncharacteristically, snapped: "Shut up." Then he said, in words I can remember almost verbatim: "Why don't you try walking in his shoes for a while and see how it feels before you make a comment like that?"

Since he didn't stone the gay guy, that means he must be gay himself!

Gotta love those DUmmies!
7 posted on 02/17/2005 6:59:09 PM PST by Freepdonia (Victory is Ours! (I told you so :-))
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To: PJ-Comix

Actually that scene was in Legally Blonde, not Liar Liar(:


8 posted on 02/17/2005 6:59:19 PM PST by AMadtes
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To: PJ-Comix
[Hey! Remember that scene in “Liar Liar” where some woman figured out that a witness was gay because he knew all about women’s shoes?

Oh PJ, you have erred and about a movie!

It was "Legally Blond"

9 posted on 02/17/2005 6:59:25 PM PST by Harmless Teddy Bear (Apparently, this is the only job for which I am suited. I am beset by the ironies of my life)
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To: PJ-Comix
It's fun to watch the DUmmies desperately grasp at straws, thinking this Gannon thing is going to be another Watergate. I haven't been to DU in a couple of days, but the last time I was there, better than a quarter of the threads were dedicated to it. The thread I chose to read was lamenting that the Daily Show hadn't picked up on it, therefore must be a pawn of the "right wing MSM"...
10 posted on 02/17/2005 6:59:41 PM PST by Welsh Rabbit
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To: PJ-Comix
Well well well, and I thought the Dems were supposed to be the champions of those LGBT types. Seems just a touch hypocritical to use someone's supposed homosexuality to attack them...

"Why don't you try walking in his shoes for a while and see how it feels before you make a comment like that?"

You realize, that if this were a liberal who said this, then they'd be worshipped, not condemned for being a hypocrite?

I'm not even going to touch the fact that some of these DUers actually seem to be buying this.
11 posted on 02/17/2005 6:59:52 PM PST by Ex-Dem (This tagline has been defaced.)
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To: PJ-Comix
orphaned child prostitutes thought

That's what the DUmmies' brains are packed with: Orphaned Child Prostitute Thoughts!

12 posted on 02/17/2005 7:00:18 PM PST by Darkwolf377 ("Drowning someone...I wouldn't have a part in that."--Teddy K)
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To: PJ-Comix

13 posted on 02/17/2005 7:00:20 PM PST by EllaMinnow (Every time a leftist cries, an angel gets its wings.)
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To: PJ-Comix
What it shows is that their support of the gay agenda is one more ploy to hold a voting block.
The people posting here obviously have a hatred for homosexuals and it would appear that if what Lanny says is true(first time for everything)it is President Bush that is not the bigoted one.
14 posted on 02/17/2005 7:02:04 PM PST by carlr
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To: AMadtes

You're right. I stand corrected. "Legally Blonde" was the movie with the guy revealed to be gay because he knew about women shoe styles. And the funny thing is the movie was ABSOLUTELY correct in this assertion. NO straight guy knows the slightest thing about women's shoes.


15 posted on 02/17/2005 7:02:04 PM PST by PJ-Comix (Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

Probably the most pathetic thread I've ever seen on DU, and that's saying a lot. These people are worse than hypocrites. They're just flat-out evil.


16 posted on 02/17/2005 7:02:16 PM PST by DGray (http://nicanfhilidh.blogspot.com)
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To: PJ-Comix
There have been Gannon stories all over DU with some posters claiming that he got unlimited access to the WH because he is lovers with A) Karl Rove, B) Scott McClellan, C) Bush.

DUs hate and stupidity knows no bounds.

17 posted on 02/17/2005 7:03:55 PM PST by DJ MacWoW ("Are you cops? FBI" bad guy, "I'm currently unemployed" Tony Almeida of 24)
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To: PJ-Comix

That last one is my favorite--Bush behaved as the DUmmies want all straights to behave toward gay people (let the gay guy alone), and thus it is proof he is gay.


18 posted on 02/17/2005 7:05:05 PM PST by Darkwolf377 ("Drowning someone...I wouldn't have a part in that."--Teddy K)
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To: PJ-Comix

Have the DUmmies ever bothered to notice the way the President and First Lady gaze with love at each other? Or hold hands whenever possible? They absolutely adore each other.


19 posted on 02/17/2005 7:05:25 PM PST by prairiebreeze (Blogs have a strangle hold on the MSM. The MSM is kicking out the windshield.)
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To: PJ-Comix
If he *is* Gay, and I believe this, it discredits him with the Religionists

The "Religionists" will take one look at the allegations and then his wife and beautiful daughters and know exactly what this is about. Their first thought...."I did not think democrats could sink any lower....I was wrong".

Please keep it up dems. LOL! You desperation is showing, not to mention you insanity.

20 posted on 02/17/2005 7:05:59 PM PST by Lady Heron
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