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Around the world there are different versions of the jolly, bearded man who gives gifts to children in December or, in some countries, January. Unlike the bloated, red-coated father Christmas of the West, Russia’s Santa Claus, known as Ded Moroz (Grandfather Frost), is slender with a wizard-like flowing beard and he wears a long robe that comes in different colors, such as blue and white. He is assisted not by elves, but by his beautiful granddaughter Snegurochka (Snow Maiden). His sleigh is powered not by reindeers, but three steely horses. What really sets Russia’s Santa Claus apart from his Western...

One day there will be a dark unending abyss. One without beginning or end, without time or space. A mere black void, of intention and as I gaze upon it, peering into its endless depth I will realize it will have nothing more perverse than what I’ve seen during the great clown age. Make no mistake the headline is not an attempt to compete with the Babylon Bee for the most outrageous satirical piece. The book in question is very much real. Marvel’s recent attempt to cash in on the step-sibling trend on Pornhub has hilarious and massively backfired in...

Having just turned five years old, I was a little young (at least back then) to question the “holiday” law-of-the-land. Of course five-year-olds believed in Santa Claus! But it was back in the day when several ages of neighborhood kids used to hang around together, and I was running with some seven- and eight-year-olds who were feeding me some pretty good reasons not to believe in that benign big man. Most of you are at least vaguely familiar with the various Protestant Reformation (and later secular) traditions that transformed Saint Nicholas into Santa Claus, so it is not necessary to...

The true story of Santa Claus begins with Nicholas, who was born during the third century in the village of Patara. At the time the area was Greek and is now on the southern coast of Turkey. His wealthy parents, who raised him to be a devout Christian, died in an epidemic while Nicholas was still young. Obeying Jesus' words to "sell what you own and give the money to the poor," Nicholas used his whole inheritance to assist the needy, the sick, and the suffering. He dedicated his life to serving God and was made Bishop of Myra while...

Almost as soon as Apple added “emoji” to its iPhone, the feature became a political football. Various groups complained that their skin tone or their flag or their lifestyle wasn’t included in the set of mini graphics that can be sent in a text message. And so, Apple has been diligently adding options in the name of supporting diversity. After getting complaints that the human-looking emoji were all yellow, Apple last year made it possible to pick the skin tone of most faces. For example, there are now six shades of Santa Clause from which to choose. And, to add...

Myron Benford has been delivering toys on Christmas Eve to children around Detroit for more than four decades. The 71-year-old man converted a Dodge minivan to look like a sleigh, complete with reindeer welded to the front, that seemingly “floats” on snow. He hands out 200 to 250 toys to children who need Christmas, he told the Detroit Free Press: Oh, it’s a year-round commitment. People think it’s just for one day. I’ve been preparing for this all year long. The day after Christmas I start packing up more toys, trying to wrap up more toys. Trying to find closeouts and so forth and...

It's that time of year for us to realize how far societies tend to veer from the true essence of things. We live in a desperately superficial culture that is too often satisfied with veneers. If it's shiny, new and untouched by real life, it strangely gives us the false assurance that it will last forever. Anyone can package up junk, put a nice shimmery bow on it and pass it off as the got-to-have-it-or-you'll-die item of the season. Even when what's inside is genuine and something we truly need, too many are content with the outer misleading packaging. We've...

My nomination for the dumbest comment of the week by a television host on a news channel goes to CNN's Brian Stelter. While talking to Slate's Aisha Harris about the reaction to her article calling for Santa Claus to be a penguin, the new Reliable Sources host wondered if Megyn Kelly wouldn't have been so adamant about Santa being white if Fox News had more black viewers (video follows with transcript and commentary):http://www.mrctv.org/videos/cnns-stelter-megyn-kelly-mightnt-have-insisted-santa-was-white-if-fox-had-more-black-viewers BRIAN STELTER: You know, to tell you what I think for a minute, I kind of wonder if FOX had a different audience demographic, if she would...

<p>Santa Claus has been “suspended” at one New Jersey school, after some parents complained it was religious discrimination.  Picture day with Santa is a long-standing tradition at Calabro Elementary School.  But this year, one parent, who is Jewish, pointed out other traditions weren’t being represented, reports CBS 2’s Kathryn Brown.</p>

If you think police ticketing Girls Scouts for selling cookies is outrageous, I've got a better one: If the Seattle City Council votes Monday to pass the anti-solicitation ordinance put forward by Councilman Tim Burgess, even your Salvation Army Santa could get a $50 ticket. If the hapless Santa didn't have the money and tried to fight the ticket, he would not be entitled to a free lawyer. And if the notice for his court date didn't reach him in time up at the North Pole and he missed his hearing, the court could issue a warrant for his arrest...

North Pole—In part two of the interview, Santa was about to tell me ten fundamental principles, or things that America needs to do to return to a Republic. It was a great day to do the interview with the sun out and temperatures at a balmy fifteen below zero—more evidence that global warming is ravaging the Earth. Elective Decisions: I’m sorry, sir, but I haven’t had the time to read the book. I did buy it though. Santa: There is no excuse for not reading the book, boy. First, you’re supporting a great conservative. Second, you’re also educating yourself in...

It isn’t often that Elective Decisions gets to do a special interview, but when Santa called from the North Pole, I was happy to hop on a flight to so see him. So I asked Santa why he chose Elective Decisions to do the interview. Why not simply call up Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity or Mark Levin? Santa pointed out that all of these men were busy with their families. He also made mention that since I had no life, I would be perfect. And, of course, he was right. After a long flight to Canada, I got on Santa’s...

North Pole—In an exclusive interview, Santa berates Congress for recently ending debate on government run healthcare. In this shocking exposé, you’ll hear hard hitting journalism you won’t get from the mainstream media. Elective Decisions asks the tough questions liberals are afraid to ask Santa. Santa weighs in on the Constitutionality of the healthcare legislation. He chimes in on the entire Democrat Party, the direction of America, and he even gives us a tip on what Democrats will receive in their stockings this Christmas. This interview isn’t for children. It isn’t for the faint of heart. It’s the kind of interview...

I've got a whiney Liberal (OK redundant) friend, who attacks conservatives and Republicans every chance he can. So we got into a discussion once (If there is such a thing as a "discussion" with a liberal) and I made the comment "that if conservatives were so bad, why doesn't he hate Santa Claus?"His response is what I always expect right away from him, until he can think about something for awhile, "F**K You". So then he asked me how I knew that Santa was a conservative. I thought I'd share some of my thoughts.1-Santa waits till everyones asleep and no...

He’s white. He’s male. He eats trans fat, smokes tobacco and is married to a woman. No wonder they hate Santa Claus in the Massachusetts public schools. OK, I’m exaggerating. As of this writing, only McCall Middle School in Winchester has formally sanctioned Ol’ St. Nick. But the day is still young. As the Herald reported yesterday, McCall’s seventh-grade field trip to see Stoneham Theatre’s stage production of “Miracle on 34th Street” was cancelled by Principal Evander French Jr. And the reason he intervened is “the objectionable nature of the content.” Fans of the original Academy Award-winning film - ninth...

SYDNEY (AFP) - Santas in Australia's largest city have been told not to use Father Christmas's traditional "ho ho ho" greeting because it may be offensive to women, it was reported Thursday. Sydney's Santa Clauses have instead been instructed to say "ha ha ha" instead, the Daily Telegraph reported. One disgruntled Santa told the newspaper a recruitment firm warned him not to use "ho ho ho" because it could frighten children and was too close to "ho", a US slang term for prostitute. "Gimme a break," said Julie Gale, who runs the campaign against sexualising children called Kids Free 2B...

Saturday, October 01, 2005 - The Danish Air Force has paid 30,000 krones (about $4,800) in damages to a local Santa Claus after its F-16s scared his only reindeer to death, Danish television reported Friday. The incident occurred in February at the farm of Olavi Niikanoff, who fulfils traditional Christmas time work as a local Santa Claus. Niikanoff said his reindeer, Rudolph, was quietly grazing when two F-16s appeared out of nowhere and roared over the terrified animal. The reindeer died on the spot from a heart attack, a veterinarian said. The farmer demanded compensation from the Air Force. After...

when my brother was six years old my dad hit a deer with his truck and got him right on the head and broke the deers nose.So he put it on the back of the truck and brought it home to clean it and cook it up.He pulled in about 10 seconds before my mom and brother did so my dad went and put down the gate of the truck and out plops the deers head and the first thing my brother saw was the blood RED nose of this deer.Now keep in mind this is about the 8 or...

The mayor who drew international attention for giving Santa the boot might find coal in her stocking after Monday's Kensington town election. Residents and business owners this week called the incident — which mobilized dozens of protest "Santas" to a December ceremony declared off-limits to the jolly old man — "a national embarrassment." The flap — which put Kensington on the map as a place long on political correctness and short on holiday spirit — was hard to foresee, folks said after listening to incumbent Lynn Raufaste and challenger Andrea Gill at a town hall forum Tuesday night. But the...