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LS9, Inc., a privately-held industrial biotechnology company based in South San Francisco, specializes in the genetic alteration of bugs -- single-cell organisms, each a fraction of a billionth the size of an ant -- so that when they feed on agricultural waste like woodchips or wheat straw, they excrete crude oil.

No, No, no, not the written content which most people agree deserves the appellation of mental compost for midgets. I’m talking about the actual physical paper product you touch with your hands. Now, I’m no more squeamish than the next guy, but I was reminded of the the deadly hazards that can be found in paper when I picked this morning’s paper up in my gloved hands and noticed this headline: “Researchers: AP’s Sludge Story Sloppy, Unfair” As is typically the case with stories found in the Virginian Pilot, this one was not written by one of the few writers...

As a canine, there’s something satisfying about watching this video. I have to say, these are folks that see the water bowl as half full instead of half empty. Maybe there’s hope for humanity after all. Let the games begin…Click more to watch the video....http://boknowsonline.com/2008/02/29/doody-olympians/

NESS CITY, Kan. - Deputies say a woman in western Kansas became stuck on her boyfriend's toilet after sitting on it for two years. Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple said it appeared the 35-year-old Ness City woman's skin had grown around the seat. She initially refused emergency medical services but was finally convinced by responders and her boyfriend that she needed to be checked out at a hospital. "We pried the toilet seat off with a pry bar and the seat went with her to the hospital," Whipple said. "The hospital removed it."

DURHAM, N.C. -- A Durham man accused of drunkenly driving into a yard was found after police followed a smelly trail of dog feces footprints. Police said 18-year-old Josue Herrios-Coronilla drove his black Camaro on the wrong side of the road Wednesday and crashed into the yard of Bill McDonald, the owner of four dogs. When police arrived, they found crushed bushes, a damaged fence, an inoperable car -- and a fresh shoe print in a pile of dog feces. Following an odoriferous trail down the street, Durham police Sergeant Dale Gunter noticed a white van driving toward him. When...

Friday, December 21 The topic for today’s update is poop. This idea came to me a few days ago when I watched Mei Lan stand on her head and produce a very adult-looking giant panda poop. The standing on her head part isn’t necessary to do this; that’s just a sign that she’s still a playful kid. However, part of growing up means eating an adult’s diet and having adult feces (a.k.a. poop). Mei Lan started producing feces similar to that of adult pandas when she started eating bamboo. Her feces are still distinguishable from her mother’s, partly because of...

LONDON - An artist is inviting Londoners to come face-to-face with the wretched labour of one of India's lowest castes - by filling an art gallery with 21 big blocks of human excrement. The monoliths are the brainchild of Santiago Sierra, whose previous work includes pumping a former German synagogue full of poisonous car exhaust (visitors wore gas masks) and an attempt to write the word "Submission" in giant, flaming letters near the U.S.-Mexico border. Elena Crippa, curator at the Lisson Gallery where the work is being displayed, said the Spanish-born artist's intention is to confront audiences with the horror...

Cure for killer bug - but there's a catch KATE FOSTER IN THE annals of medical history, this could go down as one of the most effective but stomach-churning treatments ever devised. Scientists seeking a cure for a deadly superbug have successfully treated patients using human faeces. Trials in a Scottish hospital have shown patients suffering from the Clostridium difficile bug can be cured using 'donor stool' administered via a tube through the nose into their stomach. Clostridium difficile was last week at the heart of a damning report into cleaning failures at the Maidstone and Tunbridge Wells NHS Trust...

Dog Eats $750, Family Digs Through Poop Friday, July 20, 2007 MENOMONIE, Wis. — Debbie Hulleman's dog Pepper has been known to gnaw on lipstick, munch on shampoo bottles and chew on toothpaste. But Pepper got Hulleman into a real mess after gobbling nearly $750."This is probably the worst," Hulleman said Thursday, recalling how she poked through vomit and dog piles left in the yard to recover the cash. Hulleman had asked her mother in Oakdale, Minn., to take care of Pepper and Zach, the family's other dog last month while she and husband went on vacation. Pepper, an 8-year-old...

The reporter intended the anecdote that opened part four of the Boston Globe's profile of Mitt Romney to illustrate, as the story said, "emotion-free crisis management": Father deals with minor — but gross — incident during a 1983 family vacation, and saves the day. But the details of the event are more than unseemly — they may, in fact, be illegal. The incident: dog excrement found on the roof and windows of the Romney station wagon. How it got there: Romney strapped a dog carrier — with the family dog Seamus, an Irish Setter, in it — to the...

A former Democratic Party activist who left dog feces on the doorstep of U.S. Rep. Marilyn Musgrave's Greeley office during last year's 4th Congressional District campaign was found not guilty Wednesday of criminal use of a noxious substance. A Weld County jury deliberated about two hours before acquitting Kathleen Ensz of the misdemeanor count. Her trial began Tuesday. Ensz's lawyers never denied that their client left a Musgrave campaign brochure full of feces at the front door of the congresswoman's office. But they argued that Ensz was making a statement protected by free speech - the poop was a symbol...

Cats in the Swedish town of Söderköping are facing a crackdown, after the council issued a ban on free sex and on pooping in the flowerbeds. Environmental and planning officers in the town, 180 kilometres south of Stockholm, have demanded that cat owners place litter trays outdoors. They have also said that cats not being used in breeding programmes should be castrated.

Last Updated: Monday, April 23, 2007 | 4:26 PM ET CBC News In an effort to help save the environment, U.S. singer Sheryl Crow is calling on everyone to limit the amount of toilet paper used "in any one sitting" to one square. Crow made the suggestion in her blog chronicling her recent tour of the United States on a biodiesel-powered bus to raise awareness about climate change. She and environmental activist Laurie David toured 11 university campuses to persuade students to act to help safeguard the world's environment. "I have spent the better part of this tour trying to...

Man Fined for Allegedly Using Foul Bills BURLINGTON, Iowa - A psychiatrist who police say smeared excrement on dollars bills used to pay a parking ticket has been fined $250. Ronald Preston McPike, 52, of Bonaparte, was charged with harassment of a public official after officials received an envelop in July labeled "Foreign brown substance on bills." The envelope contained several dollar bills and a parking ticket made up to McPike, police said. Tests indicated the brown substance was fecal matter that had been smeared on the bills. McPike told police the money fell into a toilet and was retrieved...

The ordeal of Dan Rather goes far beyond the man himself. It speaks to the presumption of guilt that now rules the day in America. Because of a ruthless and callow media, no citizen, much less one who achieves fame, is given the benefit of the doubt when it comes to allegations or personal attacks. The smearing of America is in full bloom. Weeks before the election, Kitty Kelley put out a book defaming the entire Bush family. The allegations were primarily made by anonymous people, but that didn't stop the media from gleefully recounting all the sordid accusations. Some...

There have been sooooo many typical Friday articles today...seems like folks are looking to blow off soem steam. :) So here we go...write whatever you want..."unnngh!" "All your base..." etc. Write about missing frogs (him name is pipkin green frog), big booties (please?), or even "ignore this thread!" Whatever you want. :)

Mfensi (Ash), Nov 17, GNA- The persistent defecation in the classrooms and on the school premises of Mfensi Basic School, in the Atwima District of the Ashanti Region, by some unknown persons, compelled the teachers and pupils to embark on a street protest on Tuesday. Mr Thomas Kyei, Head teacher, who led newsmen to inspect some of the affected classrooms, said the problem started five years ago and all efforts by the school authorities to address it have proved futile. Blackboards, furniture and the walls have all been smeared with human excreta, while some teaching and learning materials have also...

MIDI - DUKE OF EARL Duped, duped, duped...Dan was duped, duped, duped And he had stepped right into a great big pile of dog poop It was his scoop, scoop, scoop...but he was duped, duped, duped And he had stepped right into a great big pile of dog poop As he looks at his career, he has to wonder what he's been doing Each day his critics mock him...trouble at Black Rock is brewing Oh, but heeeeeeee's sure he got the story...oh, yeah...FOX News can't beat him now But poor Dan has been duped...oh, no, no, no It's okay...he...

Court to hear the scoop on dog's poop Associated Press INDIO, Calif. - A blind couple is headed to court to resolve a dispute with their homeowner association about droppings left in the street by their guide dogs. Dennis and Shirley Bartlett are aware of the pooper-scooper rules for their Desert Grove homeowner association, but said they sometimes miss droppings left by their dogs. "You can't get everything all the time," Dennis Bartlett said. The Bartletts filed a small claims suit against former association president Delmar Pierce, alleging harassment and prohibiting their guide dogs from doing what they were trained...

The US media still largely ignores news regarding the Islamic Republic of Iran. As Tony Snow of the Fox News Network has put it, “this is probably the most under-reported news story of the year.” As a result, most American’s are unaware that the Islamic Republic of Iran is NOT supported by the masses of Iranians today. Modern Iranians are among the most pro-American in the Middle East. In fact they were one of the first countries to have spontaneous candlelight vigils after the 911 tragedy (see photo). There is a popular revolt against the Iranian regime brewing in...