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Humor (Bloggers & Personal)

Brevity: Headers | « Text »
  • [Satire] Israel's response to Hamas missiles has been inhumane and disproportionate

    07/10/2014 11:44:22 AM PDT · by DanMiller · 11 replies
    Dan Miller's Blog ^ | July 10, 2014 | Dan Miller
    President Obama demands that Israel stop using WMDs and other disproportionate means to oppress the peace-loving Palestinians. Not yet recovered from His exhausting fund-raising trip to Texas, President Obama summoned barely enough energy this morning to direct The Really Honorable I.M. Totus to prepare an address for Him. He insisted that it complain bitterly but even-evenhandedly about Israel's disproportionate and hence genocidal responses to missiles for peace and unification fired by Hamas and friends. President Obama has long been well aware of Israel's problems and has often supported her by offering guidance on the best ways to reject violence and to work instead for peace and tranquility. Here, for example, is...
  • YARD SARD...?

    07/10/2014 9:42:54 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 17 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 10 July 2014 | Reaganite Republican
    -or YALE SALE?  You decide! More at Reaganite Republican...
  • DUmmie FUnnies 07-10-14 (DUmmies and KOmmies Enjoy Obama Laughing At Border Crises Meeting)

    07/10/2014 8:50:32 AM PDT · by PJ-Comix · 31 replies
    DUmmie FUnnies ^ | July 10, 2014 | DUmmies, KOmmies, and PJ-Comix
    Call it Blind Optics. The DUmmies and KOmmies are so desperate to make Texas Governor Rick Perry look bad that they overlook the fact that Obama looks horrible in the photos above and below. These photos were taken by Reuters during the B order Crises meeting yesterday. Normally the Regime would have prohibited these pics of Obama not taking the border crises seriously but apparently they have the same narrow mindset as the DUmmies and KOmmies because they focused in on Perry looking upset and thought that was a "win" for them. Actually it is turning into a bigtime...
  • Somebody Didn’t Get the Memo

    07/10/2014 7:20:38 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 10 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-10-2014 | MOTUS
    Believe me, I appreciate the fact that you adhere to my “no simian references” rule when commenting. I especially appreciate the restraint that is required when dealing with situations that some might take to be flagrant “taunting.”  Take yesterday, for example; when BO was hanging with Governor Hickenlooper and just whistling Dixie past all the grave yards: As you can see, creeper managed to rein herself in, adhering to the letter of the law if not the intent. Butt apparently somebody didn’t get the memo:Maybe because he was busy, drinking with the white boy. And please, no racist “Hickenlooper” jokes...
  • Entertainment for an old-fashioned afternoon

    07/09/2014 12:38:16 PM PDT · by DanMiller · 1 replies
    Dan Miller's Blog ^ | July 9, 2014 | Dan Miller
    Here's a video of Michael Davis performing at the Ford Theater. Former President Ronald Reagan, Mrs. Reagan and Tip O'Neil and Mrs. O'Neil laughed unreservedly. Watching the video, so did I. It's a refreshingly old-fashioned type of humor. [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6mbW-jMtrY&w=640&h=390] Video link
  • Finally: the Final Semi-Finals. Or: When Will This Nightmare End?

    07/09/2014 4:43:27 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 2 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-9-2014 | MOTUS
    Two important things you should be aware of today:1) Brazil takes a spectacular dive in the world cup; tears flow now, riots to follow.Maybe if the fans hadn’t all decided to wear elf hats…the team would have tried a little harder.There’s certainly enough blame to spread around (one of soccer’s virtues as I understand it) butt I blame the haters like Ann Coulter, who’s obsessed with hating on soccer: (h/t Gerard) The same people trying to push soccer on Americans are the ones demanding that we love HBO's "Girls," light-rail, Beyonce and Hillary Clinton. The number of New York Times articles...
  • Hump-Day Humor

    07/09/2014 2:36:58 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 3 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 09 July 2010 | Reaganite Republican
    More at Reaganite Republican...
  • Feds Say Businesses Can't Require Employees to Speak or Understand English

    07/08/2014 8:59:59 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 12 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 4 July 2014 | John Semmens
    The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) is suing Wisconsin Plastics, Inc. of Green Bay, Wisconsin for discriminating against non-native persons by insisting that employees must be conversant in English in order to hold jobs with the company. Jacqueline Berrien, EEOC Chairperson dismissed the possibility that some minimal competence in the English language might be a legitimate skill required of an employee. "Whether an employee understands English is a matter of convenience for the business,":Berrien explained. "Granted, conducting business in a single language might be more efficient. But the individual's right to speak whatever language he chooses is a human right....
  • Keeper of Names

    07/08/2014 8:58:16 AM PDT · by Steve Peacock · 43 replies
    Steve Peacock, poet | n/a | Steve Peacock
    (Based an actual encounter in an inner-city Trenton, NJ charter school). A poem.Keeper of Names By Steve Peacock Why do so many black students’ names end with “-quan” and “-asia,” the middle-aged white teacher inquires of the sole black educator in the break room. As I understand it, she replies humbly, (so as not to claim expertise on the matter), “quan,” like “DaeQuan,” has African roots. But what about “asia”? We’ve got Ta’Asia, Ti’Asia, Sequasia, Shyasia? I am truly unsure, she says. Still, he persists. There’s also Arquasia, Tintasia, and… I said I don’t know. Then there’s Quintasia, Sashasia… Oh...
  • Plants Don’t Like Being Eaten [Really bad news for Vegans]

    07/08/2014 6:45:05 AM PDT · by markomalley · 33 replies
    Moonbattery ^ | 7/8/2014 | Dave Blount
    There is bad news for moonbats who don’t eat meat because it is morally wrong to devour the flesh of murdered animals: plants don’t like getting eaten either.According to a study by Heidi Appel and Rex Cocroft at the University of Missouri, plants can identify the sound of caterpillars chewing and react to it defensively. In the study, caterpillars were placed on Arabidopsis, a small flowering plant related to cabbage and mustard. Using a laser and a tiny piece of reflective material on the leaf of the plant, Cocroft was able to measure the movement of the leaf in response...
  • “Something there is that doesn't love a wall” – Mending Wall

    07/08/2014 5:53:58 AM PDT · by NOBO2012 · 1 replies
    Michelle Obama's Mirror ^ | 7-8-2014 | MOTUS
    Ronald Reagan, 1987: “Tear down this wall!” Barack Hussein Obama, 2014: “Tear down this border!” (h/t Greg Gutfeld) Because…we don’t need no stinkin’ wall. Oh sure, there are times when “Something there is that doesn’t love a wall:” Then again, wherever there be cows, "Good fences make good neighbors." With my sincere apologies to Mr. Frost’s sensibilities. If that’s inadequate, Right, Big Guy? Right. Posted from: Michelle Obama’s Mirror 
  • Bill Clinton explains the turmoil in the Middle East....

    07/07/2014 1:11:17 PM PDT · by ken5050 · 10 replies
    one man's opinion...
    Bill Clinton gave a speech today, and during the Q&A after, was asked his view about what was happening in the Middle East. He succinctly explains it all for us as only Bubba can...
  • Congressman Barred from Immigrant Holding Area

    07/07/2014 11:05:25 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 3 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 4 July 2014 | John Semmens
    Representative Jim Bridenstine's (R-Okla) attempt to gain some first-hand knowledge on the 1200 illegal immigrant minors housed in his Congressional District was blocked by officials of the Department of Health and Human Services. "It's for the Congressman's own good," Health and Human Services Secretary Silva Burwell insisted. "Many of these youngsters are carrying infectious diseases and parasites. We cannot allow unnecessary contact with unauthorized persons." Bridenstine was advised to come back after July 21. "By that time all of the children will have been placed with other families or in shelters more suitable for the longer term," Burwell said. "It...
  • Senator Suggests President "Borrow" Power to Solve Immigration Problem

    07/07/2014 5:52:24 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 8 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 4 July 2014 | John Semmens
    Senator Dick Durbin (D-Ill) suggests that President Obama "borrow some of the unused legislative power Congress is sitting on to solve the immigration problem." "I know some of my Republican friends across the aisle will insist that the power to enact laws is exclusively reserved to Congress under our Constitution," Durbin acknowledged. "However, an even older common law principle is that a right left dormant for an extended period lapses and may be taken up by a more energetic party. The need for immigration reform has been known for a long time, yet Congress has neglected to pass legislation. So...
  • Dana Carvey Can't Mock Obama, Because Unlike Other Pols, He's Not a 'Walking, Talking Cartoon'

    07/06/2014 6:05:27 PM PDT · by 2ndDivisionVet · 42 replies
    NewsBusters ^ | July 6, 2014 | Tim Graham
    Former Saturday Night Live co-workers Dennis Miller and Dana Carvey are touring together this summer. On Sunday, The Washington Post published an interview with Carvey as the two head to the Kennedy Center in the nation’s capital for a show on July 12. While Miller now delights the right with a radio show and humorous appearances on Fox News, Carvey claims “I ride both sides.” But it became clear he doesn’t mock Barack Obama, because somehow he’s so much more serious than our other presidents and presidential candidates: “When we had the Southerners in there — [George] W. [Bush]and [Bill]...
  • Epidemic Deaths of Females Across the US Ghastly Result of Abortifacient Deprivation (Satire)

    07/06/2014 3:20:45 PM PDT · by smoothsailing · 3 replies
    The People's Cube ^ | July 2014 | Marion DS Dreyfus
    The People's Cube - Political Satire By our friend and contributor, Marion DS Dreyfus. The White House said Monday that the Supreme Court decision extending a religious exemption to the health-care law to closely held companies would jeopardize the health of women. "We believe that the owners of for-profit companies should not be allowed to assert their personal religious views to deny their employees federally mandated benefits," White House Press Secretary Josh Earnest said. Epidemic Deaths of Females Across the US Ghastly Result of Abortifacient Deprivation As the Sharks sang in "West Side Story," excusing their petty delinquencies to the...
  • Armed American Radio Live Thread (7/6/14)

    07/06/2014 11:27:18 AM PDT · by RandallFlagg · 28 replies
    http://armedamericanradio.org/ ^ | 7/6/14 | RandallFlagg
    The Armed American Radio broadcast with Mark Walters is on every Sunday 8PM Eastern, 5PM Pacific. Coming to you live from the Crossbreed Holsters Studio. Find AAR on your local stationFacebookListen LiveThe AAR iTunes podcasts are usually available the following Monday Are you sad because the GunTalk radio show with the awesome Tom Gresham ended it's last few minutes, and you have to wait a week for another firearms-related radio show to appear so you can listen? Do you crave to hear from the experts across the nation about our current problems regarding twisted politicians inflicting their anti-gun agendas on...
  • President Urges Israel to Exercise Restraint

    07/06/2014 9:52:52 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 1 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 4 July 2014 | John Semmens
    This week's discovery of the decomposing bodies of the three Israeli teenagers kidnapped and murdered by members of the Hamas terror organization last week sparked diverse reactions from key leaders. Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu vowed retribution. Hamas's Khalad Mashaal blessed the hands of the murderers. President Obama urged Israeli leaders to "exercise restraint and not take action that would destabilize the situation." While admitting that "from a Western perspective the murder of innocent civilians appears an inexcusable atrocity," President Obama cautioned that "this is not the only perspective worthy of consideration. As the Palestinians see it, all Jews living...
  • Reaganite's SUNDAY FUNNIES

    07/06/2014 3:45:19 AM PDT · by Reaganite Republican · 11 replies
    Reaganite Republican ^ | 06 July 2014 | Reaganite Republican
    More at Reaganite Republican...
  • Doctor/Patient Confidentiality Gains New Partner

    07/05/2014 10:10:51 AM PDT · by John Semmens · 5 replies
    Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 4 July 2014 | John Semmens
    It used to be that what transpires between a doctor and patient was considered confidential. Under the Affordable Care Act the Government has now been added as a participant in observing communications between doctor and patient. Health and Human Services Secretary Sylvia Burwell justified the expansion of those in the know as "only prudent. The Affordable Care Act has made the federal government responsible for the health of everyone in America. We can't adequately do that job if information on anyone's condition is withheld from us." "Unenlightened individuals may think that their health is their own concern," Burwell said. "They...