Posted on 05/29/2019 11:03:45 PM PDT by Kaslin
So, you’re a barista with a problem – you took out $200K student loans to get that master’s degree from Gumbo State in “LGBTQ2#v& Experiences as Reflected in 17th Century Bolivian Folk Songs” and now you can’t find an uncaffeinated career. Worse, those fascist monsters who you took money from based on your agreement to pay it back with interest now expect you to pay the money back with interest despite the fact that you really don’t feel like it anymore.
Well, I have a fresh solution to this crisis.
It’s an innovative strategy that totally and permanently resolves this problem in a new and exciting way.
Ready?
Here goes.
How about you pay your own student debt?
That’s it. It’s as elegant as it is simple. You. Pay. Your. Own. Debts.
If you follow this bold, one-step program – the one step is you paying your debts – then you will eventually be debt-free. And best of all, I won’t have to pay any of your debts.
See, a lot of Democrat politicians are promising “free college,” but what they really mean is “free for you.” Someone has to pay, and that someone is me, and I need to level with you.
I am not interested in paying for your college.
Now, some may call me “greedy” or “selfish” for not wishing to work and then have the money I earned taken from me to provide things to you that you want but did not pay for instead of being able to spend it – the “it” being the money I earned – on things that I want. I am okay with that. I would much prefer having people who fundamentally misunderstand the concepts of greed and selfishness call me “greedy” and “selfish” than subsidize their educations, educations that evidently did not include learning about basic concepts like greed and selfishness.
I understand that your priorities for my money may differ from mine, but it being my money, my priorities should take precedence. Here is a short, partial list of things that I prioritize for my money over paying off your student loan debts:
1. A lease on a sweet German sedan
2. A delicious tri-tip sandwich
3. A walk-in humidor
4. Guns and ammo
5. A pedicure for my wife
6. A pedicure for me
7. A pedicure for my fat corgi Bitey
8. Literally anything else but your student loan debt
Now, those who support the idea of taking my money to give it to someone else so that someone else can have things he, she or xe wants rarely put it so bluntly. It’s never, “Well, I want this education but I don’t want to do the things necessary to pay for it. I want you other people to do the things necessary to pay for it.” Instead, it’s always put in some other way that makes them taking our money to spend on things they want appear as a favor to us, the people expected to do the work.
For instance, sometimes they say that us working to give other people free stuff is an “investment.” Again with the not understanding what words means…
Traditionally, with an investment, one gets a return on investment. No one ever explains what my return on investment for Kaden’s Marxist Puppetry degree might be, other than an occasional latte which I would still have to pay for. I prefer that I instead determine how to invest my own money in order to benefit myself, which I do not see as unreasonable since it is my money. Which I earned by working.
This is the beauty of my one-step student loan plan. It puts all this controversy aside. Pay your own student loan off. That’s it. End of discussion. Now get to work.
Note that I am not pointing out how I managed to fund my own education without asking strangers to chip in – actually, without forcing them to chip in, because if you don’t pay your taxes designed to fund “free college” people with guns will come to haul you away. The argument that “I paid for mine so you should pay for you own” is valid, but we need not even reach it. No one should ever be forced to give other people free stuff. It’s my money, and that’s reason enough why you can’t have it.
I certainly understand that academia is a scam and that the government allows lending to people who foolishly undertake debts that they cannot pay. I would stop it all – no government participation in the student loan industry and full bankruptcy dischargeability for student debts. Of course, this would mean many less people taking loans, and therefore fewer college students. No lose to society there. This means many colleges would actually start having to compete for students, and even – gasp – lower prices. Sounds good to me, though they would scream bloody murder – colleges have gotten fat off of loan money and many schools would go under without this pot of suckers’ cash. Oh well.
Sure, academia is a grift, but you did sign on the line that is dotted. You took the money. And I say that you pay it back instead of me.
Now, I have read many tales of woe from people who have taken out huge student loans and have not taken jobs that pay enough to support paying them off. Yes, this is a problem. But it is your problem.
Often, after I suggest my patented student loan debt resolution system – which is, in its entirety, “Pay your own debts” – people who have taken out debts they can’t pay will ask me “Well, how do I do that?”
And my answer is, “I don’t know, because it’s not my problem. It’s your problem. You’re an adult, with at least one degree, so you figure it out.”
See, it’s important to allocate responsibility. It is not my responsibility to provide a solution to your problems. Your problems are your problems. You solve them.
Now, I can provide some helpful suggestions, if you wish to hear them. You won’t like them, because all of them recognize that your problem is your problem, not mine, and all of them require you to do things that you would probably prefer not to do. These suggestions include:
1. Get a better job. You can thank President Trump for the record low unemployment rate. Sure, you might not be able to continue at your dream job because it does not pay enough, but too bad. I’d rather pay for my own dreams.
2. Get a second job. Yeah, that will cut into your free time. Better that than paying your debt off cutting into mine.
3. Spend less on things you enjoy in order to pay off your debt faster. Again, I would prefer you to sacrifice to pay off your debt instead of for me to sacrifice to pay off your debt.
There are probably other ways to pay off your debt, but I am not going to spend my time thinking about them. After all, your student debt is your problem, so you spend time thinking about how to pay it off.
Now, let me once more provide you with my student debt solution.
Here it is again.
Pay your own student debt.
Creating a debtor class of over-educated, under-smart serfs with gender studies degrees is another Cloward-Piven-seque ploy to undermine our society in the pursuit of the socialist Utopia our garbage ruling class seeks to command. Of course, this would be a Utopia built of envy, incompetence and lies. If you want to see the reality of the country they dream of, then check out my action-packed yet super-snarky novels about the United States’ split into red and blue countries, People's Republic, Indian Country and Wildfire. Liberals hate my novels. The sissy castaways from the Weekly Standard call them “Appalling.” So, obviously you’ll call them “Awesome.”
Yep, she finally got rid of him.
Her new Fiance is a great guy and he works his butt off. His Parents were pretty well off but they made sure their five Sons worked for everything. Nothing was handed to them.
Of course he is from a fine Southern Family. LOL
It’s great that they really seem to love each other. She is happier than I have seen her in years. We look at it being the first truly Adult relationship of her Life. Let’s just say they are smitten with each other.
The Wedding should be a humdinger.
I went into the army with a GED. I got out 9 1/2 years later with a BS at 75-90% tuition assistance and lots of free CLEP tests. Picked up an A&P and Pilot’s license as well using my own money.
How does an uncollectable debt constitute an asset?
At some point the attempts to collect turn into a joke.
To have learned to stop being in the business of special government guaranteed loans that rise above the ordinary loan risk environment and against the nature of humanity as created will be freeing.
“Usury” was one of the evils that divine counsel advised against.
I don’t know what possessed America to go into this business. It wasn’t a “conservative” idea anyhow by most any definition. Why should school cost more than what a classload of students can reasonably raise while studying, after willing benefactors are counted in?
I have no school loan axe to grind, or does anyone I personally know. But the experience sure sounds like a schooling about folly.
Now that I’ve vented, I can even see the reason for the snark. Lefties are being schooled in what it would be like to have to live with the consequences of a lefty idea. It’s easy to relish the schadenfreude, but at some point school has to let out, with wiser lessons learned.
If you want to get training without paying for it, there are ways. Get into a trade. First of all,it’s not like going to college to hopefully find work for which you were trained, when such may not be available, or have even been available at the time you started college classes. Getting into a trade may mean serving an apprenticeship, but at least you are actually working at something which includes a paycheck; possibly a very good one at some point. Serving as an apprentice electrician is a good example of that. Going into the military may provide excellent training in certain areas & of course, it carries a paycheck of sorts. So, there are a couple of reasonable alternatives to college. Of course, there are some careers for which college is necessary & which may mean incurring some debts. You are taking a big chance in doing this & incurring those debts however.
If you want to get training without paying for it, there are ways. Get into a trade. First of all,it’s not like going to college to hopefully find work for which you were trained, when such may not be available, or have even been available at the time you started college classes. Getting into a trade may mean serving an apprenticeship, but at least you are actually working at something which includes a paycheck; possibly a very good one at some point. Serving as an apprentice electrician is a good example of that. Going into the military may provide excellent training in certain areas & of course, it carries a paycheck of sorts. So, there are a couple of reasonable alternatives to college. Of course, there are some careers for which college is necessary & which may mean incurring some debts. You are taking a big chance in doing this & incurring those debts however.
Does your beloved “Jubilee” expunge all debt, or only “uncollectable” debt?
At the minimum subject it to the same rules as bankruptcy. We could do more, like maximum loan durations and no government guarantees.
That said, I have no problem with hitting up the colleges to help pay off the debt, with the condition that the students who benefit forfeit their "studies" degrees, for the reason I gave in my last post.
The colleges have been taken over by Marxists...
... but lead to no marketable skills.
_________________________________
Can you imagine if progressive colleges can get taxpayers to completely finance their healthy paychecks and Marxist indoctrination camps? The graduates will come out fully brainwashed and dependent on government benefits to supplement their low paying jobs. The Left’s future power will be assured.
Those are all good ideas.
Doesn’t sound to me like “jubilee”, though.
At the least it’s like the relative good feeling of ceasing to be hit on the head with a hammer. Is it utter bliss? Of course not. But any exit from foolishness is better than none. Perhaps something like Peace Corps or armed service could be an ameliorating factor, less exacting than bankruptcy.
That is not entirely true. I know kids with nursing degrees, finance, and accounting degrees, business degrees and the like who are sucking air because of loans.
the predatory nature of the colleges is a big issue.
the drama is around the fool degrees, there are few of those, is is mostly around the heavy burden on all of them
There are alternatives to getting degrees (or at least certified) in those fields that won't get you in debt for over a hundred thousand dollars. It comes down to making the right choices, but it also comes down to making sure our children are aware of those alternatives.
With those who are in this position, if we are going to implement a policy of debt using your method to make the colleges pay for their tuition, then they should forfeit their degrees. I agree with you that colleges shouldn't be trapping our children into huge loans with outrageous tuition, but I don't agree with the students getting something for nothing either.
most of them have not gotten something for nothing.
They have been trapped for the past 8 to 15 years under the debt.
forfitting degrees, sure why not? Take the degree away from a nurse or an engineer, and that will take away their governement licenses to practice, lose them their jobs and bankrupt them. Go right ahead.
My husband rented a not-very-renovated chicken coop while getting his doctorate in Physics. Rode his bike. Ate cheap crappy food. Valet-parked cars, among many other pitiful jobs. No loans. In his pre-PhD education it was the same. No help from anybody.
I worked in the college dish room, was a waitress, and typed term papers for guys on a junky old portable typewriter, with carbon paper. (It was the ‘60s.). I didn’t graduate, but worked for Fortune 100 companies, getting my foot in the door with excellent typing skills (one class of Personal Typing in high school). I worked hard, learned OJT and advanced to making excellent salaries - enough to provide a happy retrement. A college degree isn’t necessary for everyone.
Owing money to anyone scares both of us so we don’t do loans. Cash only, even for houses and cars. Can’t imagine having to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars in student loans. Terrifying.
"This is the beauty of my one-step student loan plan. It puts all this controversy aside. Pay your own student loan off. That’s it. End of discussion. Now get to work." Straight, to the point and definitive. Great article, thanks.
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