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Explaining Thanksgiving to the French
The Los Angeles Times | November 28 1996 | Art Buchwald

Posted on 11/27/2002 6:12:58 AM PST by LonePalm

A la Recherche du Temps Perdue
By Art Buchwald

Thursday, November 28 1996
The Los Angeles Times

[ In 1953, during my tour of duty with the French Foreign Legion in the Sahara, my tough sergeant from Marseilles said to me, "Why do all the American recruits refuse to eat anything but turkey on this day?"

I told him I was sorry but my lips were sealed. He then poured honey on my head so the ants would get me. That's when I broke down and talked.]

One of the most important holidays is Thanksgiving Day, known in France as le Jour de Merci Donnant.

Le Jour de Merci Donnant was first started by a group of pilgrims (Pelerins) who fled from l'Angleterre before the McCarran Act to found a colony in the New World (le Nouveau Monde), where they could shoot Indians (les Peaux-Rouges) and eat turkey (dinde) to their hearts' content.

They landed at a place called Plymouth (now a famous voiture Americaine) in a wooden sailing ship named the Mayflower, or Fleur de Mai, in 1620. But while the Pelerins were killing the dindes, the Peaux-Rouges were killing the Pelerins, and there were several hard winters ahead for both of them. The only way the Peaux-Rouges helped the Pelerins was when they taught them how to grow corn (mais). They did this because they liked corn with their Pelerins.

In 1623, after another harsh year, the Pelerins' crops were so good they decided to have a celebration and because more mais was raised by the Pelerins than Pelerins were killed by the Peaux-Rouges.

Every year on le Jour de Merci Donnant, parents tell their children an amusing story about the first celebration.

It concerns a brave capitaine named Miles Standish (known in France as Kilometres Deboutish ) and a shy young lieutenant named Jean Alden. Both of them were in love with a flower of Plymouth called Priscilla Mullens (no translation). The vieux capitaine said to the jeune lieutenant:

"Go to the damsel Priscilla (Allez tres vite chez Priscilla), the loveliest maiden of Plymouth (la plus jolie demoiselle de Plymouth). Say that a blunt old captain, a man not of words but of action (un vieux Fanfan la Tulipe), offers his hand and his heart -- the hand and heart of a soldier. Not in these words, you understand, but this, in short, is my meaning.

"I am a maker of war (Je suis un fabricant de la guerre) and not a maker of phrases. You, bred as a scholar (Vous, qui êtes pain comme un etudiant), can say it in elegant language, such as you read in your books of the pleadings and wooings of lovers, such as you think best suited to win the heart of the maiden."

Although Jean was fit to be tied (convenable a être emballe), friendship prevailed over love and went to his duty. But instead of using elegant language, he blurted out his mission. Priscilla was muted with amazement and sorrow (rendue muette par l'etonnement et la tristesse).

At length she exclaimed, breaking the ominous silence, "If the great captain of Plymouth is so very eager to wed me, why does he not come himself and take the trouble to woo me?" ("Ou est-il, le vieux Kilometres? Pourquoi ne vient-il pas aupres de moi pour tenter sa chance?")

Jean said that Kilometres Deboutish was very busy and didn't have time for such things. He staggered on, telling her what a wonderful husband Kilometres would make. Finally, Priscilla arched her eyebrows and said in a tremulous voice, "Why don't you speak for yourself, Jean?" ("Chaçun a son gout.")

And so, on the fourth Thursday in November, American families sit down at a large table brimming with tasty dishes, and for the only time during the year eat better than the French do.

No one can deny that le Jour de Merci Donnant is a grand fête, and no matter how well fed American families are, they never forget to give thanks to Kilometres Deboutish, who made this great day possible.

(C) 1996, Los Angeles Times Syndicate.


TOPICS: Food; History; Humor; Miscellaneous; Religion; Travel
KEYWORDS: artbuchwald; food; french; humor
This is my favorite Art Buchwald column.

What is not to like? He talks about my ancestors, food, and makes fun of the French?

'La bonne cuisine est la base du véritable bonheur.' - Auguste Escoffier
(Good food is the foundation of genuine happiness.)

LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)

1 posted on 11/27/2002 6:12:58 AM PST by LonePalm
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To: RikaStrom; Slip18; xsmommy; Constitution Day; Gabz; Enterprise; one_particular_harbour; hobbes1; ...
Enjoy y'all.

'La bonne cuisine est la base du véritable bonheur.' - Auguste Escoffier
(Good food is the foundation of genuine happiness.)

LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)

2 posted on 11/27/2002 6:15:51 AM PST by LonePalm
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To: LonePalm
I still have the printout of this that you gave me when we first met.
I think it's great!

CD

3 posted on 11/27/2002 6:20:31 AM PST by Constitution Day
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To: LonePalm
Kilometres Deboutish

LOL!

4 posted on 11/27/2002 6:21:20 AM PST by xsmommy
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To: LonePalm
Leave it to you! LOL!

Happy Thanksgiving!
5 posted on 11/27/2002 6:28:18 AM PST by lds23
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To: LonePalm; xsmommy
Thanks for sharing this! xsmommy, don't you think LP also needs to share some Thanksgiving recipes for us?
6 posted on 11/27/2002 6:30:35 AM PST by TxBec
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To: TxBec; LonePalm
yes! LP, please fill us in on what you are serving tomorrow!
7 posted on 11/27/2002 6:31:46 AM PST by xsmommy
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To: LonePalm
are you art buchwald? ; )
8 posted on 11/27/2002 6:32:08 AM PST by xsmommy
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To: LonePalm
Bump.
9 posted on 11/27/2002 6:33:25 AM PST by Cyber Liberty
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To: TxBec; xsmommy
Since you asked. We are not having Thanksgiving dinner at our house because it is a mess with the basement finishing going on (Everything that was in the basement is now upstairs with us. We are going over to friends.

They are originally from Hong Kong and have never had an American Thanksgiving Dinner cooked in their house. They weren't even in their house last Thanksgiving due to water damage and repairs. I am going over about 9am and Kriss and I are going to cook the dinner. He likes to cook and wants me to teach him how to cook better.

We are having:
Various appetizers (I'm not doing this part.)
Brined Roast Turkey (see Good Eats @ FoodTV.com) and Country Ham.
Southern Cornbread, Oyster, and traditional Sage & Apple Dressings(that's three kinds)
Mashed potatos, and candied yams
Green Bean Cassarole
Shoepeg corn soufflé
Baby Carrots with an orange-ginger glaze
Cranberry Orange Relish (This is so easy to make but you have to do it the day before.)
Apple, blueberry, and Chocolate pecan pies with fresh whipped cream for dessert.
Wine, ale, and french presse coffee

I think that's everything. (Serves 20 but we will only have 6 adults and 5 kids.)

'La bonne cuisine est la base du véritable bonheur.' - Auguste Escoffier
(Good food is the foundation of genuine happiness.)

LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)

10 posted on 11/27/2002 6:59:09 AM PST by LonePalm
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To: LonePalm
sounds yummy! wish i was going to NJ instead of OH for tgiving, i know you are a much better cook than my sisterinlaw!
11 posted on 11/27/2002 7:01:05 AM PST by xsmommy
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To: xsmommy
No, I'm a conservative. I would like to write comedy as well as he does.

Constitution Day, Cyber Liberty, and Slip18 have all met me in person and can verify that I am, indeed, not Art Buchwald. He's much older.

'La bonne cuisine est la base du véritable bonheur.' - Auguste Escoffier
(Good food is the foundation of genuine happiness.)

LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)

12 posted on 11/27/2002 7:02:30 AM PST by LonePalm
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To: LonePalm
i was just teasing ya, LP, you being so frenchified and all!
13 posted on 11/27/2002 7:04:04 AM PST by xsmommy
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To: LonePalm
Hee-hee-hee. I'm going to show this to the French couple next door.
14 posted on 11/27/2002 7:26:12 AM PST by Gumlegs
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To: LonePalm
Wow! (smiling because we are having cranberry relish too, only ours is a' la H.E.B.)

:: staring at the half-finished tiled living/dining room. We are gonna have to just wear blinders tomorrow and imagine the rest finished :)

15 posted on 11/27/2002 7:49:31 AM PST by TxBec
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To: LonePalm
They landed at a place called Plymouth (now a famous voiture Americaine) in a wooden sailing ship named the Mayflower, or Fleur de Mai, in 1620.

The first Thanksgiving was at Jamestown, VA in 1607 or 08. The didn't eat snails either and still don't. The Plymouth people were still Eurotrash at that time.

16 posted on 11/27/2002 8:40:48 AM PST by putupon
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To: putupon
Oh yes, without a doubt. Both sides of my family had the great foresight to be thrown out or run out of europe in the early 1600's and sent here. What a good deal, at least for us 12+ generations later.

This is one of the things that gripes me about the reparations argument. All of the descendents of slaves currently living in the US are much better off BECAUSE their ancestors were brought here as slaves. That doesn't mean that slavery was right. Just as good intentions can have bad results, bad intentions and actions can ultimately have good results.

It is amazing what almost 400 years will do to elevate a bunch of malcontents to almost mythical status. The pilgrims got better press than the Jamestown settlers in the late 1800's. You should see how the original convict settlers are celebrated in Australia.

I still wish I had written the article. Joyeux de Jour de Merci Donnant.

'La bonne cuisine est la base du véritable bonheur.' - Auguste Escoffier
(Good food is the foundation of genuine happiness.)

LonePalm, le Républicain du verre cassé (The Broken Glass Republican)

17 posted on 11/27/2002 11:10:00 AM PST by LonePalm
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Comment #18 Removed by Moderator

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