Biden Comforts Hurricane Victims By Talking About Time The Urinal Splashed Back At Him A Little

BabylonBee.com ^ | 8-30-2023 | Bee Staff

[servo1969]

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In the wake of Hurricane Idalia making landfall in Florida, President Joe Biden offered suffering victims in the Sunshine State comfort by telling them about the time he was in the bathroom and the urinal splashed back on him a little bit.

"I've been in the same situation, folks," Biden said as he made remarks to the media regarding ongoing disaster relief efforts in Hawaii and Florida. "These hurricanes and storms flooding everything remind me of my own challenges. There was this one time, at a state dinner with the Pope, and I had to go see a man about a mule, so I go to the ladies' room, but they kick me out, so I go to the men's room, and I'm doing my thing there at the…at the…at the…the urinal…and it…and it…splashed back on me a little bit. My own urine. Can you believe that? Awful day. Anyway…"

Media outlets hailed the president's story and how it relates to the plight Florida residents now face after having their homes and places of business flooded. "Such an inspirational tale," said CNN's Dana Bash. "For President Biden to show devastated Floridians that he's been where they are and felt what they're feeling…it's awe-inspiring."

At publishing time, White House insiders reported relief among the communications team that it's likely many Florida residents were unable to hear the president's comments due to widespread power outages and being preoccupied with trying to salvage whatever may be left of their lives and belongings.

[servo1969]

[ConservativeInPA]

It’s not satire when it’s true.

[Sacajaweau]

Don't laugh...his speech included "our house was struck by lightening...and it was 7 months before we could get back in.

First I don't believe it. Second...he's got 4 or 5 houses.

[Sacajaweau]

https://www.firehouse.com/home/news/10516121/lightning-sparks-fire-at-bidens-house

[Sacajaweau]

I send my love to the BEE...thanks for all the smiles you make.

[euram]

It was probably much more severe than a splashing urinal, probably a toilet overflow since he’s so full of sh!t.

[alloysteel]

When speaking of the experiences that Joe Biden describes, parody is not possible. Joe exceeds every expectation in that way.

Which is probably the only expectation he exceeds. Joe falls woefully short in just about every other category.

[Toespi]

Yesterday he added another layer to the story, “so much damage was done it almost collapsed half the house”

Someone is lying and it shouldn’t be that difficult to find the truth. The on scene firefighters claimed it was a kitchen fire and contained within twenty minutes.

[1Old Pro]

+1 satire must be close to the truth to even be amusing, and the bee nails it.

[Sacajaweau]

see post 4

[Delta 21]

https://youtu.be/RHFlE6wDdBU?si=gSn9mHnXzPfL04rf

[Toespi]

Thanks! Pretty much settles that.

[Billthedrill]

The Bee is in trouble again. You can’t satirize Biden Clown World. Can’t be done.

[Sacajaweau]

wonder what he told the insurance company....

[SunkenCiv]

Babylon Bee of course.

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[hdbc]

Ltr.

[falcon99]

Boy, does that ever peg out pervert in chief.

[Toespi]

Funny! I have been thinking the same thing. Jill got a new high end kitchen, all new furniture, probably a complete home remodel all from an insurance claim. What insurance company and adjuster would argue with a Senator?

[Sacajaweau]

I’ve seen an entire house payoff...smoke damage...caused by a kitchen fire. You bet they made out!!