Posted on 06/13/2023 9:00:09 AM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an address to the nation, El Presidente Biden showed off his cool new uniform covered with flashy medals and assured the nation that the U.S. is not a banana republic.
"Listen, folks, this is ridiculous," said El Presidente as machine gun fire went off in the background. "Just because I'm using the corrupt power of my administration to prosecute a political opponent, doesn't mean we are a banana republic. We're a nation of laws and freedom! If you weren't free, would I be wearing my beautiful gold Presidential Medal of Freedom right now? I think not!"
Media outlets praised Biden's bold and impressive new look. "It's as if the shiny gold of Dear Leader's well-deserved medals are signaling a new dawn for our country and all humanity," said CNN anchor Wolf Blitzer. "For the first time, I feel safe, wrapped in the loving arms of our Lord Ruler. Blessings be upon him!"
Sources say Biden's political opponent, Donald Trump, is finally being held responsible for the egregious crime of having classified documents while not being a member of the ruling party. "I AM THE MOST PERSECUTED PERSON WHO HAS EVER LIVED," said Trump in an all-caps rant on TRUTH Social. "NO ONE HAS EVER BEEN MORE MISTREATED THAN I HAVE. THIS IS A PHONY WITCH HUNT AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT!"
Sources confirmed Trump is scheduled to disappear mysteriously next Tuesday.
At publishing time, the Biden Regime reiterated that the U.S. is not a banana republic and that anyone who says otherwise will be indicted and then shot.
Need to at least grow bananas to be one... well, at least we are a republic.
Oh, wait... we're not that either.
Sometimes the The Babylon Bee is closer to prognostication than to satire.
In this case, I really had to look the publisher to know.
Next he’ll declare that our Official Language is Swedish.
Not The Bee. I mean, it IS the Bee. It’s hard to tell sometimes.
Classic.
I understand that Hugo Boss designed some pretty snappy outfits.
The uniform needs bananas on it.
https://www.moothearth.com/products/banana-republic-american-flag-the-us-usa-banana-republic-flag-for-sale?variant=1000009472544773
Gotta love the Bee. Wonder how long it will be before it gets shut down because of “disinformation or misinformation”?
Almost truths sometimes hurt really bad. Especially when the almost truth hits the Funny Bone.
Libtard ‘democracy’
....and some rainbows.
Shortly after the Biden Regime reiterated that the U.S. is not a banana republic and that anyone who says otherwise will be indicted and then shot, then the Regime rephrased it to shot then indicted.
Biden’s the Worst. President. Ever.
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