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CIA Replaces Waterboarding With 12-Hour Lectures On Intersectional Feminism
The Babylon Bee ^
| May 5, 2021
| The Babylon Bee
Posted on 05/06/2021 8:24:49 PM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
WASHINGTON, D.C.—According to anonymous sources, the CIA has replaced enhanced interrogation techniques such as waterboarding with something even more torturous and effective: 12-hour academic lectures on intersectional feminism.
"Waterboarding has been shown to be very effective," said the anonymous source. "But that's been replaced now. Now we just pop in a tape of Robin DiAngelo, Stacey Abrams, or Joy Behar. Sometimes we'll really ramp things up and make them watch Coca-Cola's diversity training on a 12-hour loop."
Terror suspects will be subjected to lengthy lectures about cis-male privilege, heteronormative patriarchy, and microaggressive mansplaining. Sources say these lectures are 1,282% more effective than regular old waterboarding.
Critics have criticized the new interrogation method, saying that such cruel torture should be limited only to American universities.
TOPICS: Conspiracy; Health/Medicine; Humor; Military/Veterans
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; cia; torture; waterboarding; wokeness
Wokeness will win the war on terror!
To: 100American; al baby; Allegra; BufordP; dp0622; EveningStar; Gefn; GunsareOK; JRios1968; ...
Subject the terrorist to wokeness, and they are toast!
DANG!
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Sweet Lord I’d rather take the waterboarding
3
posted on
05/06/2021 8:52:22 PM PDT
by
Secret Agent Man
(Gone Galt; Not Averse to Going Bronson.)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
4
posted on
05/06/2021 9:04:33 PM PDT
by
a fool in paradise
(Lean on Joe Biden to follow Donald Trump's example and donate his annual salary to charity. L)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Subject them to lectures by Ashleigh Shackleford, aka Ashleigh the Lion. “Paypal me”.
5
posted on
05/06/2021 9:05:46 PM PDT
by
Fred Hayek
(Antifa=BLM=RevCom=CPUSA = CCP=Democratic Party )
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks; null and void; aragorn; AZ .44 MAG; Baynative; bgill; bitt; Black Agnes; ...
######
PING
Article and # 3.
6
posted on
05/06/2021 9:14:31 PM PDT
by
LucyT
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
A Freeper defined Intersectional Feminism as;
A crazy cat lady starter kit.
7
posted on
05/06/2021 9:17:07 PM PDT
by
Hillarys Gate Cult
(Where words can mean anything they can also mean nothing.)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
My goodness, if they institute this in SERE training the washout rate will soar back up to what it was in the good old days.
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
You know, having a job doing this sort of stuff must be so much fun. I couldn’t because I lack the imagination. But I am happy for these people creating so much amusement. These people have got to be “ornery”.
9
posted on
05/06/2021 9:28:40 PM PDT
by
The Right Edge
(Staunch Trump Supporter AND PROUD to be!)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
“WASHINGTON, D.C.—According to anonymous sources,”
And THAT was the masterstroke of the whole article.
10
posted on
05/06/2021 9:43:00 PM PDT
by
DesertRhino
(Dog is man's best friend, and moslems hate dogs. Add that up. .... )
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
the CIA should just play Claus Nomey singing “You don’t own me” to the Arab terrorist captures.
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
LOL!
Reminds me of a scene from one of Woody Allen’s movie where a prisoner was confined into solitary confinement with a life insurance salesman.
12
posted on
05/06/2021 10:27:59 PM PDT
by
aquila48
(o not let them make you care! Guilting you is how they control you. )
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
They could just play clips of kommula cackling when asked an incriminating question.
13
posted on
05/06/2021 10:46:42 PM PDT
by
metmom
(...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith....)
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
sometimes satire is too close to reality
14
posted on
05/06/2021 11:09:12 PM PDT
by
wafflehouse
(RE-ELECT NO ONE !)
To: All
In the Billy Wilder film, the torture technique to break down a Communist into confessing was priceless......
forcing him to listen to endless playing of "Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini" during a brutal
interrogation. He cracks and signs a confession that he is an American spy.
15
posted on
05/06/2021 11:23:41 PM PDT
by
Liz
(Our side has 8 trillion bullets; the other side doesn't know which bathroom to use. )
To: All
Oh yeah, that’ll do it.......makin’ ‘em watch Coca-Cola’s diversity training on a 12-hour loop........
16
posted on
05/06/2021 11:26:08 PM PDT
by
Liz
(Our side has 8 trillion bullets; the other side doesn't know which bathroom to use. )
To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
It should work!
I crack after about 30 seconds of that crap...
17
posted on
05/07/2021 4:07:42 AM PDT
by
Adder
("Can you be more stupid?" is a question, not a challenge.)
To: Secret Agent Man
There will be a hundred question test in essay form!
To: Smellin Salt
and also this
19
posted on
05/07/2021 7:58:39 AM PDT
by
norsky
(<a href=></a> <img src=""></img>)
To: All
12-Hour Lectures On Intersectional Feminism?
Must be a Do’s and Don’ts for women drivers?
20
posted on
05/07/2021 3:54:48 PM PDT
by
Liz
(Our side has 8 trillion bullets; the other side doesn't know which bathroom to use. )
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