Public Figures Comment on "Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?"

24 May 19 | hapnHal

[hapnHal]

How today’s public figures would answer the question of “Why did the chicken cross the road?" Q What would be OAC's comment ?

DONALD TRUMP: We will build a big wall to keep illegal chickens from crossing the road. We will have a door for legal chickens.

JOHN KERRY: We will trust the chicken to tell us whether it crossed the road or not.

CHRIS CHRISTIE: We need to water board that chicken to find out why it crossed the road.

RAND PAUL: It’s none of our business why the chicken crossed the road.

NANCY PELOSI: We will have to wait until the chicken crosses the road to see what it says.

CARLY FIORINA: Hillary Clinton lied about why the chicken crossed the road.

BRIAN WILLIAMS: I crossed the road with the chicken.

BEN CARSON: This isn’t brain surgery… to look for pyramids… it wanted grain.

SARAH PALIN: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he’s a maverick!

BARACK OBAMA: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period.

HILLARY CLINTON: What difference at this point does it make why the chicken crossed the road?

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

BERNIE SANDERS: That little chicken will pay 80% income taxes no matter what side of the road it’s on. She’s got to help finance free college even for those that just want a four year vacation.

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white?

[Flaming Conservative]

Elizabeth Warren -— it’s NOT a chicken! It’s an eagle!...ok...it’s a chicken. I’m gonna get me a beer!

[Fast Moving Angel]

JERRY NADLER: I ate the chicken

Dang it!! You beat me to it! :-)

[Fast Moving Angel]

COLONEL SANDERS: What, I missed one?

[1_Rain_Drop]

Extremely funny.
Thanks for the laughs!

[rlmorel]

[chajin]

Cardinal Sarah: in remembrance of its baptism.

[lee martell]

You may have just made that word up.
But if it’s real, it probably means Ear, Nose & Throat Doctor. Am I right? Or should I substitute a ‘Beak’ for a nose?

[1_Rain_Drop]

That’s a classic joke and so old!
Let the good times roll!

[Dr.Deth]

JOHN PODESTA: >also crosses road with no pants on<

[Beowulf9]

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez: Because that chicken knows the world is going to end in 12 years. I can’t make myself any more clear. Like I’m not an expert on this stuff.

[Texas resident]

Why did the punk rocker cross the road?

To get to his buddy, Beto.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

To get away from Bernie Sanders.

[onyx]

JAMES COMEY: It’s classified!

[clintonh8r]

Mark Steyn: To get away from Kevin Spacey. Me: to prove to the armadillo that it can be done.

[Flaming Conservative]

Jim Comey -— why did the chicken cross the road? Who can say for sure? I’ve pondered this while walking through the woods, and I’ve decided she did it to escape the evil that is this administration, for the good of the country... for the good of all mankind, really... I think that I shall never see, a thing as lovely as...

[rfp1234]

Bingo!

https://www.thefreedictionary.com/otorhinolaryngologist

[CardCarryingMember.VastRightWC]

Why did the chicken cross the road?

For fowl purposes.

[Fiddlstix]

[Jeff Chandler]

Dr. Seuss : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed it, I’ve not been told!

Emily Dickinson : Because it could not stop for death.

Ernest Hemingway : To die. In the rain.

Henry David Thoreau : To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life.

Mark Twain : The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

Oliver Stone : The question is not, ‘Why did the chicken cross the road?’ but rather, ‘Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?’

Ralph Waldo Emerson : It didn’t cross the road; it transcended it.

Robert Frost : To reach the sidewalk less travelled by.

William Shakespeare : I don’t know why, but methinks I could rattle off a hundred-line soliloquy without much ado

George Orwell : Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests.

[Jeff Chandler]

Captain James T. Kirk: “To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.”
Grandma: “In my day, we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.”
Fox Mulder: “You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?”
Dana Scully: "I know the chicken crossed the road, but it just doesn't make sense — why would the chicken risk crossing the traffic?"
Martin Luther King, Jr.: “I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.”
Ernest Hemingway: “To die. Alone. In the rain.”
Mary Shelley: "To build a perfect chicken from the discarded entrails of convict chickens."
Karl Marx: “It was a historical inevitability.”
Martha Stewart: “A properly dressed chicken may cross the road, and that’s a Good Thing — but be sure to sell your chicken stock if you hear any rumors about oncoming traffic.”
Sigmund Freud: “The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.”
Bill Clinton: “I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. . . . It depends on what the meaning of ‘chicken’ is.”
Hillary Clinton: “I’m proud to say that that chicken was a constituent of mine here in the great state of New York, and a Yankees fan.”
Aristotle: “It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.”
Louisa May Alcott: "Because Marmee thought the chickens across the road could use a little more feed in the cold winter, during the war."
Bill Gates: “I have just released e-Chicken 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook — and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of e-Chicken.”
Colonel Sanders: “I missed one?”
Condoleezza Rice: “That chicken will cross the road only when this government decides that régime change is in its long-term strategic interest.”
Rush Limbaugh: “I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this?

[Envisioning]

Probably the most inane, stupid thread I’ve ever seen.

Well....now you’ve done it. LOL,