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Woman Makes $13 A Day Selling Pet Rocks...Robert Downey Jr. Made Millions For ‘Spider-Man’-SATIRE
The Babylon Bee ^ | Staff1/12/18

Posted on 02/02/2018 6:36:39 AM PST by fungoking

O. EM. GOSH.

It’s 2018, and inequality is still a HUGE problem, even in a progressive utopia like Hollywood.

Case in point: this woman’s name is Xayley Briers. She spends forty-five minutes a day running her Etsy storefront selling pet rocks. Do you know how much she makes? About $13 a day.

Pretty sad, right?

Well, it gets worse. While Briers works her butt off selling and shipping pet rocks all over the country for almost an hour each day, Hollywood A-lister and cisgendered white male Robert Downey Jr. made around $15 MILLION for his work in mega blockbuster Spider-Man Homecoming.

And what did he do? Simply help the movie make hundreds of millions of dollars worldwide. Both people are working hard, and one is making a LOT more money than the other. Why do you think that is? Oh, that’s right.

It’s because she’s a WOMAN and he’s a MAN and our country apparently still doesn’t recognize women as human beings.

Can you say “injustice?” DISGUSTING.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; humor; satire
I'm triggered!
1 posted on 02/02/2018 6:36:39 AM PST by fungoking
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To: fungoking

Robert Downey Jr. plays IRONMAN............................


2 posted on 02/02/2018 6:39:26 AM PST by Red Badger (Wanna surprise? Google your own name. Wanna have fun? Google your friends names......)
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To: fungoking

That’s over $17 an hour. Not bad. What does she do the other 23 hours of the day?


3 posted on 02/02/2018 6:39:39 AM PST by FoxInSocks ("Hope is not a course of action." -- M. O'Neal, USMC)
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To: fungoking
Yet the GUY that came up with the idea for Pet Rocks made millions too.
4 posted on 02/02/2018 6:41:53 AM PST by Wingy
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To: fungoking

People still buy pet rocks...every day?


5 posted on 02/02/2018 6:42:50 AM PST by bk1000 (I stand with Trump)
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To: Red Badger

He had a role in the Spider-Man movie.


6 posted on 02/02/2018 6:44:43 AM PST by woweeitsme
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To: fungoking

Is that the woman from Boulder ,Colorado?


7 posted on 02/02/2018 6:49:50 AM PST by bramps (It's the Islam, stupid!)
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To: bramps

Marblehead.


8 posted on 02/02/2018 6:53:57 AM PST by wally_bert (I didn't get where I am today by selling ice cream tasting of bookends, pumice stone & West Germany)
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To: fungoking

So if this girl works 45 minutes a day then what is she doing the other 7 hours and 15 minutes? My guess is that she is cashing her welfare checks, sponging off her boyfriend, and making other people miserable as she bothers them about her stupid pet rocks.


9 posted on 02/02/2018 6:55:48 AM PST by WMarshal ("IN AMERICA WE DON’T WORSHIP GOVERNMENT — WE WORSHIP GOD." POTUS tweet 2017)
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To: fungoking

It is totally outrageous that the welfare of this poor lady is being taken for granite. Equality of outcome should be the bedrock of our society.


10 posted on 02/02/2018 6:57:47 AM PST by abishai
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To: abishai
being taken for granite. Equality of outcome should be the bedrock of our society

Got to be a joke in there, somewhere.

11 posted on 02/02/2018 7:33:54 AM PST by grobdriver (BUILD KATE'S WALL!)
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To: fungoking; All

I know this might count as “projecting”, but this chick is exactly the type that when you enter her house you will see a 4 foot tall glass bong in the living room.


12 posted on 02/02/2018 8:26:06 AM PST by T-Bone Texan
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To: abishai
Thank you for getting it.

Judging by some of the post some think this is real. Next time, in the title I should type “SATIRE” in all caps...wait, never mind.

13 posted on 02/02/2018 9:55:54 AM PST by fungoking (Tis a pleasure to live in the 0zarks)
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To: fungoking

Well, i’d tell her to get a job as an actress so she could possibly make that much, but who wants to deal with getting molested and raped? Or even witness a potted plant getting violated?


14 posted on 02/02/2018 3:22:31 PM PST by Trillian
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