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ESPN Baffled What Athlete Kneeling With Eyes Closed And Hands Folded Could Possibly Be Doing
Babylon Bee ^ | 09/10/2023 | Babylon Bee

Posted on 09/10/2023 4:20:11 PM PDT by DFG

QUEENS, NY — As tennis champion Coco Gauff knelt on the court with her eyes closed and hands folded, puzzled ESPN commentators were left to wildly speculate as to what Ms. Gauff could possibly be doing.

"What do you make of it, Jean?" asked commentator Pam Shriver. "Perhaps it's a new yoga pose? Never seen anything like it!"

As Ms. Gauff completed the mysterious ritual and rose to her feet, ESPN producers pored over prior videos. "It appears Ms. Gauff has performed this bizarre practice several times in the past," said ESPN's Bill Bonnell. "We're still at a loss. The only similar thing we've ever seen was when people would kneel on one knee in honor of Tim Tebow, also known as 'Tebowing'. Maybe Coco just doesn't know how to 'Tebow' properly."

Eventually, a low-level producer explained to ESPN that Ms. Gauff was praying. That producer was subsequently sacked, and the person who hired him was also sacked for good measure.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; coco; espn; espnbigots; gauff; humor; joke; notreal; usopen

1 posted on 09/10/2023 4:20:11 PM PDT by DFG
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To: DFG

Have they banned the expression “Hail Mary pass”?


2 posted on 09/10/2023 4:22:11 PM PDT by gundog (It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. )
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To: DFG

A Tremendous Victory for Free Speech!
BROWNSTONE INSTITUTE SEPTEMBER 10, 2023

Friday’s decision provides a crucial step in fighting against that informational totalitarianism.

The Fifth Circuit issued an injunction that prohibits the Biden Administration from taking actions:

“to coerce or significantly encourage social-media companies to remove, delete, suppress, or reduce, including through altering their algorithms, posted social-media content containing protected free speech.”

https://brownstone.org/articles/a-tremendous-victory-for-free-speech/


3 posted on 09/10/2023 4:31:01 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (Georgia just crystallized Trump’s campaign with a copyright-free image winning him nomination!))
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Comment #4 Removed by Moderator

To: DFG
We apologise for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible have been sacked.

Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretty nasti...

'We apologise again for the fault in the subtitles. Those responsible for sacking the people who have just been sacked have been sacked.

5 posted on 09/10/2023 4:38:41 PM PDT by Pontiac (The welfare state must fail because it is contrary to human nature and diminishes the human spirit.)
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To: Pontiac

Glad I’m not the only one who noticed the Monty Python reference in the last line of the article.


6 posted on 09/10/2023 4:46:08 PM PDT by EvilCapitalist (81 million votes my ass.)
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To: DFG

“But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.”

-Matthew 6: 5-6


7 posted on 09/10/2023 4:46:59 PM PDT by Az Joe (Live free or die)
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To: DFG

I watched the game and the commentators did talk about her praying.


8 posted on 09/10/2023 4:51:29 PM PDT by JSM_Liberty
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To: EvilCapitalist

I would have posted the entire quote but that would be a lot of editing in the breaks and paragraphs


9 posted on 09/10/2023 4:57:56 PM PDT by Pontiac (The welfare state must fail because it is contrary to human nature and diminishes the human spirit.)
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To: DFG

Praying?


10 posted on 09/10/2023 5:33:31 PM PDT by SkyDancer (If At First You Don't Suceed, Well So Much For Skydiving ~)
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To: DFG

If this had been Wimbledon they would have been sacked. As the US Open is in the U.S.,, they were actually shit-canned.


11 posted on 09/10/2023 5:35:53 PM PDT by Lisbon1940 (I don’t see why they would)
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To: EvilCapitalist

Where’d you get the coconuts?


12 posted on 09/10/2023 5:36:06 PM PDT by bwest
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To: DFG

Can’t help but think this was a stunt to rehabilitate her past support of BLM and numerous comments about social Justice, having never seen her pray before (not good for endorsements and big money). After her OPEN semi-final win, she was told Naomi Osaka was in the stadium, at which time she waved, spoke to and praised Osaka, who, during the BLM nonsense called America a GENOCIDAL country. Of course, we can’t forget Coco’s wild on stage rant, with her BLM mask, fist raised, screaming “I DEMAND CHANGE”.


13 posted on 09/10/2023 6:04:50 PM PDT by Toespi
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To: gundog

Could be new dance move like “Vogue”?


14 posted on 09/10/2023 6:31:28 PM PDT by If You Want It Fixed - Fix It ( )
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To: bwest

Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate?


15 posted on 09/10/2023 6:35:53 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: DFG

After calling a high-level bored meeting at ESPN to discuss it, they decided that that activity should be called "knee-napping".

16 posted on 09/10/2023 6:44:18 PM PDT by Songcraft
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To: gundog

Those bitches should be fired.
There job is to report tennis, not to unfairly ridicule a player.

Pam Schriver? Is she any relation? Throw her stupid butt out.
She is one of many reasons why I despise ESPN’s product.

They hire amateurs who make stupid statements without thought.
I have muted the commentators on ESPN+ College Baseball coverage because they are not familiar with the sport and make dumb remarks about action on the field.
I give ESPN+ an “F”
I would rather start driving to the away games than put up with their crap.


17 posted on 09/10/2023 7:16:50 PM PDT by BatGuano (2020 = Stolen Election. Believe it! Molon Labe.)
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To: dfwgator

But African swallows are non-migratory.


18 posted on 09/11/2023 10:20:34 AM PDT by bwest
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