Posted on 08/24/2022 11:37:22 AM PDT by DFG
CAMBRIDGE, MA — President Biden announced plans today to forgive $10,000 in student loan debt for anyone making less than $125k per year. In completely unrelated news, the nation's colleges and universities announced plans to immediately raise tuition by $10,000.
"Look, Jack! Here's the deal! No malarkey at all! Not a joke!" said Biden before an aide had to step in and explain he was signing an order to forgive student loan debt.
Dr. Charles Moneybags, director of the National Association for the Advancement Of College Professors (NAACP), said he applauds the president's decision to cancel student debt for so many borrowers. "We're very excited that a college education will be more affordable for the next generation of art history majors," he said.
Moneybags then went on to explain why immediate tuition increases were necessary. "Due to an unfortunate concurrence of high inflation, global warming, and, uh, the upcoming solar eclipse in 2024, we've all had to raise our tuition by $10k," he noted. "Plus, we've had to spend a ton of money building safe spaces and bathrooms for all the new genders."
Shelia Johnson, a 45-year-old Harvard student working on her ninth degree, said she is excited for her loans to be forgiven, but worries about the ever-increasing cost of education. "I'm nervous that I might need to leave school one day to get a job and start paying my loans," she said. "Hopefully President Kamala Harris can find a way to solve this problem."
At publishing time, Moneybags had invited the press corps to his summer home in the Hamptons to show off the new helipad he had installed next to his swimming pool.
pretty much...
50% of Americans have below average IQs. It shows.
any idea how long before all the bad loans hit their tax accountants?
i mean, they will all be written off just like FJB did... right??
and won’t that cause a big hole in tax revenues???
This one made me laugh out loud, since I came back over here right after reading about Ford raising the price of their battery electric vehicles by $8,500, right after the “Inflation Reduction Act” extended the $7,500 EV credit ... but only for taxpayers who make enough to owe $7,500 in federal income taxes after all of the other credits.
Yeah, the Babylon Bee’s version of the NAACP is pretty right on.
It would make more sense if the lenders raised the amount owed by $10,000. ;)
what about those taking out $10,000 in student debt next semester? are they just screwed?
Once again, the BB is more truth than fiction. My university admitted to this years ago after people began complaining about skyrocketing tuition. At our annual faculty meeting, the president displayed a chart showing that tuition increases mirrored federal/state aid increases. If aid went up by $700 one year, tuition also went up by $700.
You can bet on it.
Same goes for all the solar and electric car rebates.
just to be clear, there is no plan to eliminate student debt
the plan is simply to transfer that debt to those that don’t owe it
It would have been even more believable if BB has stated a $15K increase in tuition.
Just rearranging the furniture on the deck of the Titanic. As usual.
It’s obvious that colleges will do that. Since the “government” is paying, just jack up the prices as far as they can go.
This is a gift to colleges, courtesy of the democrats, who expect a payback.
The next step after “forgiving” (it’s not forgiving), is to have “government” pay the colleges for tuition, so college will be “free” as bernie sanders promised.
Breaking - latest news is 20,000 forgiveness for families making under $250K and an additional 10K forgiveness for lower income students;
Not funny.. that’s exactly what the filthy car manufacturers did!
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