Time to shut down all the monkey houses in DC!
Posted on 10/11/2013 9:20:10 PM PDT by John Semmens
With the Parks' restrooms at the World War II Memorial in Washington, DC closed, a truckload of portable restrooms of the sort used at construction sites was donated by private citizens. NPS Rangers blocked these from being unloaded.
“The President has instructed us to shutdown this site,” explained NPS Director Jonathan Jarvis. “As everyone knows, our efforts have been thwarted by aged veterans breaching our barricades. We certainly can't reward this disobedience by allowing bladder and bowel evacuation facilities near the Memorial.”
Jarvis scoffed at the notion that this could be construed as vindictive. “Hah, these guys faced worse when they were fighting the Nazis and Japs,” Jarvis gibed. “Were there porta potties on Okinawa or Normandy Beach? If anything, we're helping them relive some of the hardships they faced in their glory days. Where's the gratitude?”
In related news, the NPS has begun removing handles from water fountains in public parks they can't effectively block the public from entering. “Sure, it costs extra time, money and effort to do this,” Jarvis admitted. “But we need to make every reasonable effort to prevent people from using federal park facilities. If a few people suffer from heat exhaustion because they're dehydrated maybe they'll get the message: these parks are CLOSED.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/143279-2013-10-11-semi-news-a-satire-of-recent-news-october-13-2013.htm
ping
John, I;m afraid this may not count as satire - it is entirely too believable. I expect to see a serious news story that reads much the same within the next few days...
Collect the poop and place in a strategic location... Bring buckets
Park Rangers Refuse Truckload of Porta Potties for WW II Veterans
http://nation.foxnews.com/2013/10/10/park-rangers-refuse-truckload-porta-potties-ww-ii-veterans
A semi carrying porta potties pulled up yesterday beside the WW II Memorial in Washington D.C.. The porta potties were donated by private citizens to help out the visiting veterans since the facilities are closed.
However, the park rangers turned the truck away and they were not allowed to unload. Michele Tennery witnessed this event and was astonished that the rangers could be so heartless in their treatment of the veterans. Michele added, “The photos show the attempted delivery of Port-A-Johns by Don’s Johns. The NPS Ranger would not allow the Port-A-Johns to be left at the WWII Memorial site on the grassy area (where the National Park Police have parked 10+ vehicles!). The NPS has not opened the bathrooms at this Memorial site so there are no open bathroom facilities onsite at the WWII Memorial.”
Where is the satire?
Just the quote?
P2 rejects NPS retards.
Just be careful where you step in the Parks.
according to Jay Carney " the president is extremely angry that the Cloward-Piven sanitation system is being plugged up by the Republican House "
according to Jay Carney " the president is extremely angry that the Cloward-Piven sanitation system is being plugged up by the Republican House "
Maybe they were too concerned that citizens might put the rangers in the potty hole?
Time to shut down all the monkey houses in DC!
LOL! Well done
I know this is satire John, but it’s based on something that happened and I really do think it’s time to shut down the National Parks Service. Turn it over to the states, that is where the land belongs anyway.
John I know you do satire but I also know you base it on reality. Is the porta pottie story true?
I’ve got potty I’d like to donate to the government.
“...........and I really do think it’s time to shut down the National Parks Service. Turn it over to the states, that is where the land belongs anyway.”
Absolutely. Been my thought on the matter as well.
I know this is satire...or not.:)
So what happens when the Feds shut down health care because of some political b.s?
Nah I’m not worried...Who me? Worry?
Thanks or the ping.
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