DUmmie FUnnies 04-22-13 (DUmmies were hoping for a RW Boston Teabomber!)

DUmmie FUnnies ^ | April 22, 2013 | William Rivers Pitt, DUmmies, and Charles Henrickson

[Charles Henrickson]

Let's see. . . . April 15, Tax Day. . . . Boston, site of the original Tea Party. . . . Boston, America's most liberal city. . . . "Patriots' Day," a term that the wingnuts would love to use. . . . So who are the obvious perpetrators of the Boston Marathon bombing? Why, right-wing white Christian conservatives, of course! Teabaggers! TeaBOMBERS!

That was the immediate and quite predictable reaction of the DUmmies in the wake of last week's bombing. Never mind the fact that 99% of all terrorist attacks in the world over the past 40+ years have been perpetrated by people who have one thing in common--and it ain't Christianity. No, we can't say that. So we'll ignore reality and hope against hope that it was some old white guy--maybe one of those dangerous Missouri Synod Lutherans--that did the deed.

To prove the point, today we'll look at a few of the DUmmieland threads that were posted in the aftermath of the bombing, before the actual perps were identified, namely, this THREAD by William Rivers Pitt, which the foul-mouthed Pitt entitles "J**** F***ing C*****"; another THREAD by the Bostonian Drunkard, "My City," in which Will makes it all about about Will; and this THREAD by some other DUmmie, "If This Doesn't Scream 'Teabagger Group,' I Don't Know What Does."

So let us now go back a week and watch the DUmmies jump to their preconceived conclusions, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, back after a seven-week stretch of being too busy to DUFU, is in the [brackets]:

J**** F***ing C*****

[Will, if you were using our Lord's name rightly, as a prayer uttered in distress at the shocking news, that would be one thing. But you've got to turn it into a profanity, which is par for the course for you.]

Bombs at the marathon. . . . It happened right by the bandstands, hard to believe this was an oxygen tank or gas line or manhole explosion, but who knows.

[Oh, I think we all know, instantly, what happened and who did it. But I predict you DUmmies will not be able to SAY what everybody knows.]

Awful.

[On that, Will, I think we all can agree. But now let's see you guys jump to your predictable prog conclusions . . .]

Sounds like rightwing nut group.

[Of course. Who else COULD it be?]

this smells like a domestic operation by a nut or two operating on their own, probably right wing.

["Probably"?? Certainly!!]

Tax Day. Boston. Gun Legislation in Congress.

[Put out an APB for an orange-faced man from Ohio.]

my initial guess is anti-government, pro-gun, right wing cranks.

[And MY initial guess was that that would be YOUR initial guess.]

a Timothy McVeigh type. . . .

[PUH-LEEZE let it be a white guy with an Anglo-sounding name!!]

CNN just said it is "Patriots Day" too, kind of speculating the same way we were.

[CNN, engaging in wild speculation with a left-wing bias?? NO!!]

I think the fact that it happened in Boston, on Tax Day, at a section of the Marathon apparently dedicated to the families of the victims of the Newtown Shooting, at a time when congress is at least pretending to debate gun legislation.... paints a pretty clear picture of what forces might be at play, here.

[It's GOT to be anti-tax gun nuts! Case closed!]

I'm willing to bet, based upon the admittedly limited information available, that it was domestic right wing anti-government gun nuts.

[See, what did I tell you?]

On some other sites people are already accusing Islamic terrorists.

[You're kidding! How absurd is that? Isn't Islam "the Religion of Peace"?]

4 days before anniversary of Waco & Murrah Fed Building in OKC. My bet is anti-government gun nuts.

[On the DUmmieland tote board, "Right-Wing Gun Nut" is the prohibitive favorite.]

I'll bet you it's right-wingers. Tax Day, in Boston? The only question now is whether we're talking about religious theocrats, white-supremacists or anti-government/anti-taxers.

[Undoubtedly a combination thereof. "White Christian Teabagger," "Right-Wing Gun Nut," same difference.]

WTF? Islamists? Teabaggers?

[Clearly, Teabaggers. Islam is the Religion of Peace®.]

Someone's ass is gonna fry for this. I just hope it's the right ass.

[Which would be a right-wing ass.]

[Now William Rivers Pitt, aka the Bostonian Drunkard, starts another thread . . .]

My city.

[Note, not "Our City." "My City." Leave it to Will to make it all about Will.]

I have a two-week-old baby laying in the arms of my wife here at home.

[Yes, William Rivers Pitt is now a FATHER! More on that later. Please continue, Will, to make this major news event all about you.]

I live three miles away from where this happened. I am staying put...but I want to go down there WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING.

[Just like you wanted to go down to the Occupy event all those months. But someone strapped you to your Barcalounger and you couldn't go.]

This is my city.

[No one else's. It's all about me.]

I want to go there to help, to find friends, to defy whoever did this, because f*** this sh*t, that's why. F*** this sh*t.

[Will uses profanity to make himself sound like a tough guy. He WOULD go down there and help the police and apprehend--and probably beat up--those right-wing teabagger bombers, but he just can't.]

But I'm staying put. G*d d*mn it to Hell, I'm staying put.

[Theyll just have to carry on without me.]

My daughter now lives in a world where her home town was bombed on Marathon Day. . . .

[A world in which William Rivers Pitt is her father. Yikes.]

Stay safe Pitt.

[Don't worry. William Rivers Pitt is Boston Strong.]

I was born about three Kilometers from the scene of interest. . . .

[Leave it to a DUmmie to say "Kilometers". . . .]

I may be 2800 miles away but it's a "home" place for me. . . .

[How many kilometers would that be?]

I'm proud of you Will. You are now in the group that have dependents. You hurt for your city and your friends but you also know your new, perfect, daughter now impacts your actions. A daughter needs her dad period end of story. You feel a new different pain that is agonizing and tormenting and that is a revelation that pulls you ever deeper into life and it's meaning. Hang in there bud, keep your family safe, go out of town and stay at a relatives and give yourself some respite. This is just the beginning, you might yourself making even more different choices as the new life you have plays out. Your going to do just fine.

[DUmmie Phlem agrees with Will: It's all about Will. Look, William WANTS to go down there and help WITH EVERY FIBER OF HIS BEING. This is HIS CITY, dammit! But he just can't.]

self serving blather. When so many people are doing things to help, why are you even bothering to post this? It's not your city, it's our city.

[William Rivers Pitt is the Shakespeare of self-serving blather. Self-serving blather is his métier.]

[Well, let's get back to finding out who the bombers are . . .]

If This Doesn't Scream "Teabagger Group," I Don't Know What Does

[After all, those Tea Party people have killed so many already.]

1. It was done on April 15th. Tax Day. Who hates taxes more than anyone?
2. It was done in Boston, where the original Boston TEA PARTY occurred.

[3. I WANT it to be them, so it must be.]

I'd be willing to bet you a shiny new dime that this is some far-right-wing, White (likely White Supremacist), Teabagger Militia group.

[Bet One D*mn Dime Day!]

I know that all the right-wingers in this country are just PRAYING that it's some Muslim terrorist group. . . .

[How about all the REALISTS in this country just REASONABLY SUSPECTING that it's Muslim terrorists, based on the history of these things? No, that can't be!]

so they can blame Obama for being soft on terrorism. . . .

[What if one of the bombers turns out to be a pot-smoking Obama supporter (which he is)? Would you make him an honorary DUmmie?]

the fact of the matter is that this whole situation just SCREAMS American far-right extremists.

[Or not.]

Apparently we're supposed to wait an unspecified period of time before stating the obvious.

[After 24 business hours, we can state that you're obviously wrong.]

Date, time, place all scream right-wing domestic terrorism.

[You scream, I scream, we all scream . . . WE HOPE IT'S NOT ISLAM!!]

Maybe. But it sounds a lot like the bombings in London & Europe...in subways, on buses, in cafes. IEDs.

[Shhh!!! Quiet!!]

On second thought, what you say does make sense.

[Whew, you had me worried there for a minute! You were bordering on a Brief Moment of Mental Clarity!]

jihadists.

[NO! STOP!!]

its common knowledge these tea party extremists HATE Massachusettes. . . .

[Therefore . . . therefore . . . THEY'RE THE BOMBERS!]

The Boston Marathon....on tax day....on Patriot Day....in Massachusetts....which has a BLACK governor who is best friends with Obama. . . .

[That's it! It's those d*mn racists! They HATE that we have a black man in the White House! Clear motive!]

Any psycho can make IED's these days, and plenty of people have experience with them and their application after our lengthy Iraq fiasco.

[Bush's fault!]

If it turns out a right-wing groups is responsible for this, I'm calling for their f***ing heads. After Sandy Hook, the NRA and the prosthetic penis club all called for us to "hold off". To "wait and be respectful". In other words, wait for the political fire to die down so they can do damage control and retain power. F*** that sh*t. I say strike while the iron is hot. I don't have to be respectful to a group of violent savages that are guilty of sedition and treason. I don't have to be respectful of these murderous reptiles that have repeatedly called for violence against us for daring to vote, daring to challenge them, daring to claim our civil rights. I don't have to be respectful to this toxic cancer that is eating our country alive. If they're responsible for this, I demand vengeance. I want these right-wing sons-of-b*tches to be put down.

[DUmmie backscatter712, for this hate-filled rant that does not wait for the facts, we hereby declare you the winner of today's Peace, Love, and Tolerance Award®. Congratulations!]

Will you do the same if it turns out to be Islamists?

[Which it did turn out to be, of course. Anybody with a brain could have predicted that. So, by Friday, what were the DUmmies saying to cover their tracks? Take a look . . .]

This had all the earmarks of a rightwing terrorist attack. It wasn't. But that doesn't change the fact that it had all the earmarks of one. . . . it still had TONS of evidence pointing to it being a rightwing terrorist attack. The fact that it was not does not change that fact.

[The fact that it MIGHT have been, but it wasn't--that is a FACT! Earmarks are close enough. It's a FACT that it could have been!]

- - - - - - - - - -

[PROUD PAPA PITT ADDENDUM: As noted upthread, William Rivers Pitt is now a FATHER! Will, I didn't know you had it in ya! Congratulations, and I mean it sincerely. Glad that mother and child are doing fine. Little Lola Jane is a cutie. And I really do think you'll be a devoted daddy. But I do get a kick out of the timing of the birth. Yes, friends, the offspring of William Rivers Pitt was born on--wait for it--April Fool's Day! How appropriate! Hee! Hee!]

[PJ-Comix]

Even a lot of DUmmies basically told Pitt to STFU after his self-serving blather about what a hero he would have been IF ONLY he had been on the scene.

BTW, I finally figured out the mystery of why Pitt never showed up at the OWS Boston rallies even though they took place only few blocks from his home and even though he was urging his fellow DUmmies to show up. At first I thought the reason he avoided OWS Boston was due to either laziness or he was worried about being cut off from his trust fund gravy train. It was neither. When I finally figured out the reason (which should have been obvious from the get-go) I burst out laughing. It is actually quite FUnnie. Let's see if anyone else can guess the reason. I will reveal it in due course but I would like to see what others think the reason was that he avoided OWS Boston.

[PJ-Comix]

OT but where is the LCMS convention going to be this July? I mean Houston is sort of old hack. Believe it or not, Las Vegas would be a good site. Great convention facilities. Even Billy Graham went there since I remember he was on the scene of the MGM Grand fire in 1980.

p.s. Also inexpensive food and, dare I say, drink. I believe the beer at Circus Circus was free as long as you kept playing poker or the machines.

[PJ-Comix]

[PUH-LEEZE let it be a white guy with an Anglo-sounding name!!]

It sounds like the DUmmie version of a prayer.... "Dearest goddess Gaia, who art in heaven, PUH-LEEZE let it be a white guy with an Anglo-sounding name!! If you make it so, I will sacrifice a bong stick in your honor at the next Wednesday Night Oak Worship service."

[Army Air Corps]

I am surprised that Know-It-All Nadin didn’t chime-in on any of the Boston Bombers threads.

[Arrowhead1952]

This had all the earmarks of a rightwing terrorist attack. It wasn't. But that doesn't change the fact that it had all the earmarks of one. . . . it still had TONS of evidence pointing to it being a rightwing terrorist attack. The fact that it was not does not change that fact.

HUH??? Where bees yo tons ov evidence? The lack of facts is guilty until proved innocent, unless u bees a dummie posting at the DUmp. Let's see them facts.

[Arrowhead1952]

BTW, NOT guilty verdict for those two.

[AlexW]

“If This Doesn’t Scream “Teabagger Group,” I Don’t Know What Does”
____________________________________________

Perfect example of why DU is truly a dump full of mentally deranged Communist. They represent the most extreme of mental retardation and stupidity in America.
I doubt if even the CPUSA would accept these nut-jobs.

[hsalaw]

“Well, the trouble with our liberal friends is not that they are ignorant, but that they know so much that isn’t so.” Pres. Ronald Reagan

[Condor51]

I was born about three Kilometers from the scene of interest. . . .

In American that means: 'about 15 Blocks'
[I hate it when pretentious Moonbats speak Canadian ]

ps: Welcome 'back' Charles, you were missed.

[rollo tomasi]

"This had all the earmarks of a rightwing terrorist attack. It wasn't. But that doesn't change the fact that it had all the earmarks of one. . . . it still had TONS of evidence pointing to it being a rightwing terrorist attack. The fact that it was not does not change that fact."