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Hostess Brands to Be Liquidated
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 16 Nov 2012 | John Semmens

Posted on 11/18/2012 9:58:44 AM PST by John Semmens

The financially troubled manufacturer of dessert cakes announced it will be forced to liquidate its assets. The move was in response to a strike by 5,000 employees represented by the Bakery, Confectionery, Tobacco Workers and Grain Millers Union and will result in the layoff of 18,000 employees.

AFL-CIO President Richard Trumka denounced the company, calling its decision “a direct contradiction and insult to American voters. Just a week ago voters reelected President Obama. Rather than accept this vindication of the President’s policies, the management of Hostess is putting profit ahead of social justice.”

Hostess has been in precarious financial shape for years. It first filed for bankruptcy in 2004. It emerged reorganized in 2009, but has still experienced net losses. The company again filed for bankruptcy in early 2012. The liquidation plan calls for the company’s iconic brands—Twinkies, Ho-Hos, Ding-Dongs, etc.–to be sold to the highest bidders and the cash used to repay outstanding debts.

Trumka said Hostess management’s decision “putting the repayment of debt ahead of the benefit of employees is emblematic of the anti-social nature of capitalism. Here we have owners saying they’re going to sacrifice the livelihoods of thousands of workers just because they can’t afford to pay them decent wages.”

To avert the loss of jobs at Hostess, Trumka urged President Obama to intervene. “There’s no question that these workers need these jobs,” Trumka asserted. “Likewise, there’s no question that consumers want their Twinkies. The government should provide the funding necessary to assure the continuation of both.”

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://azconservative.org/2012/11/17/ag-defends-suppressing-petraeus-scandal/


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: layoffs; satire; socialism; unemployment; unions

1 posted on 11/18/2012 9:58:48 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens
"Hostess is putting profit ahead of social justice.

By liquidating?

Looter mentality.

2 posted on 11/18/2012 10:04:20 AM PST by YHAOS (you betcha!)
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To: John Semmens

My local market is about 25% junk food. I think we’ll all survive, besides I’ve been seeing generic twinkies and cupcakes for years now. $1000 for a box of Twinkies on ebay recently (completed auction)...hopefully not paid for with food stamps.


3 posted on 11/18/2012 10:09:00 AM PST by Huskrrrr
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To: YHAOS

S-A-T-I-R-E


4 posted on 11/18/2012 10:09:58 AM PST by Kickass Conservative (Win or lose, Impeach Obama Ben Ghazi...)
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To: Kickass Conservative

I’m really slow today.


5 posted on 11/18/2012 10:11:34 AM PST by Huskrrrr
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To: YHAOS

“Hostess is putting profit ahead of social justice.”

=========================================================I I am sure others notice that every time that guy speaks, he spouts a line or two of Marxist doctrine.

“Vulture capitalism”.

“Social justice”.

Pure Marxist.


6 posted on 11/18/2012 10:21:52 AM PST by old curmudgeon
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To: John Semmens
I thought you might work this tidbit about those baker union bosses in there somehow...


7 posted on 11/18/2012 10:22:10 AM PST by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: Kickass Conservative

Like most S-A-T-I-R-E its essence is the truth. That’s exactly what Trumpka would say (and has said on more than one occasion).


8 posted on 11/18/2012 10:24:43 AM PST by YHAOS (you betcha!)
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To: Kickass Conservative

Satire or not, Trupka’s pronouncements have included Marxist buzz words including “vulture capitalism”.


9 posted on 11/18/2012 10:25:41 AM PST by old curmudgeon
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To: John Semmens

Sugar Pang Epidemic Strikes America!!

bump


10 posted on 11/18/2012 10:27:10 AM PST by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: old curmudgeon
"a line or two of Marxist doctrine."

As I said, "looter."

11 posted on 11/18/2012 10:27:54 AM PST by YHAOS (you betcha!)
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To: John Semmens
Richard Trumka makes about $300K per year (2010). If he wants social justice (as if there even is such a thing)let him pay for it.

http://www.unionfacts.com/employees/AFL-CIO

12 posted on 11/18/2012 10:27:56 AM PST by Fzob (In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock. Jefferson)
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To: GeronL
Sugar Pang Epidemic Strikes America!!

Governor Christie Hit Hardest.

13 posted on 11/18/2012 10:28:51 AM PST by dfwgator
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To: dfwgator

Governor Christie declares it a worse disaster than Sandy, begs Bruce Springstein and Barack Obama to make it all better.


14 posted on 11/18/2012 10:31:57 AM PST by GeronL (http://asspos.blogspot.com)
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To: Kickass Conservative
Here's what Trumka actually said

What’s happening with Hostess Brands is a microcosm of what’s wrong with America, as Bain-style Wall Street vultures make themselves rich by making America poor. Crony capitalism and consistently poor management drove Hostess into the ground, but its workers are paying the price. These workers, who consistently make great products Americans love and have offered multiple concessions, want their company to succeed. They have bravely taken a stand against the corporate race-to-the-bottom. And now they and their communities are suffering the tragedy of a needless layoff. This is wrong. It has to stop. It’s wrecking America.

Poe's law is in play every time this knukleheads open their mouth. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poe's_law

15 posted on 11/18/2012 10:35:39 AM PST by Fzob (In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock. Jefferson)
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To: John Semmens

Good stuff!

I can actually believe EVERY word of it!


16 posted on 11/18/2012 10:51:00 AM PST by Las Vegas Ron (Medicine is the keystone in the arch of socialism)
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To: John Semmens

I just want to know where all the product that’s in the warehouses now goes!!


17 posted on 11/18/2012 10:57:03 AM PST by My hearts in London - Everett (Gingrich or bust! (5/7/12, I guess it's bust.))
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To: John Semmens

My CDL safety trainer said Obama wouldn’t affect the trucking industry. 1: Hostes will no longer be shipping freight. That means less jobs for truckers. 2: Hostes will not be the last. 3: Right here on the dash board of my company truck is a sticker “US EPA Certified.” It’s an idle control function that shuts off the engine, electricity, heater, cooler after five minutes which lowers my quality of life and sleep. Muslims are not the only ones who want us back to the stone age. Might as well accept it and train to be a survivalist. Americans have chosen poorly 2006, 2008, 2012.


18 posted on 11/18/2012 11:48:22 AM PST by conservativeimage.com (I don't blame Obama. I blame America for choosing him.)
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To: My hearts in London - Everett
"I just want to know where all the product that’s in the warehouses now goes!!"

There are none left. All gone, only two on the market shelf Friday evening. I suspect they are all gone too! Sorry about that! An Old Man

19 posted on 11/18/2012 1:15:08 PM PST by An Old Man
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To: John Semmens

Great satire John. One idea for improvement: you should have had Trumka saying he thinks the unions can have their cupcakes and eat them too. And I’m sure you’re thrilled by suggestions for your columns from fellow Freepers. (smirk)


20 posted on 11/18/2012 10:39:03 PM PST by driftless2
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To: Fzob

Of all the rotten union chiefs whose words I’ve heard or read over the years, Trumka is by far the worst.


21 posted on 11/18/2012 10:41:16 PM PST by driftless2
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