Posted on 10/23/2008 7:11:26 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson
The Dems are getting nervous. The polls are tightening, knuckles are whitening, and the prospects are frightening! Witness this HUffPo THREAD by Sherman Yellen, "My Coming November Crackup." In spite of some polls giving Obama a sizeable lead, this old HUffie fears Rovian Republican chicanery come Election Day. Hee! Hee! So before we get to his thread, let's reinforce Sherman's fears with a song. Click and sing along!
CRY (If you see polls)
By Johnnie Ray-of-Sunshine
Tune: "Cry" (If your sweetheart) Original
If you see polls that turn out to be too high
It's just Diebold, you'll feel better if you cry
When voting on a touchscreen
Don't you sometimes think it's real
But it's only fall elections that they steal
If the FReepers seem to hang around and gloat
And the red states keep getting redder with each vote
November storm clouds can be found
Behind the sunny skies
So get your hopes down and go on and cry
If the FReepers seem to hang around and gloat
And the red states keep getting redder with each vote
Well now, November storm clouds can be found
Behind a sunny sky
So get your hopes down and go on and cry
So now let's watch Sherman Yellen gird his loins for "My Coming November Crackup," in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, Charles Henrickson, still recovering from "My Cubs' October Crackup," is in the [brackets]:
My Coming November Crackup
[I have a feeling WE'RE going to crack up reading about it! Start, Yellen!]
I just spoke to my old college friend Roger.
[Emphasis on "old."]
We are older men with reasonably good nervous systems . . . yet this election has been a new high in personal fear and trembling.
[Old Yellen!
Calm down, Yellen!
Stressed, downright down and depressed. . . .]
Our cracks are beginning to show. . . .
[Joe the Plumber Disease.]
And damn it, we have become more and more fearful and superstitious. . . .
[If your cracks begin to show, be careful not to step on them.]
We both confessed to waking up real early and heading towards . . .
[. . . the bathroom. Sherman's March to the WC. Gird up your loins, Sherm!]
. . . our laptops to check on the latest results in the presidential polls before feeding the cat or making the morning coffee. . . .
[A beeline to get online before feline or caffeine-mainline.]
A ten point lead? Nothing! What's that to these Republicans, trained from birth to swallow ten points for breakfast with their orange juice and Metamucil?
[Breakfast without election fraud is like a day without sunshine!]
Do we exaggerate their power to find and kill Osama, rig the voting machines, and smear, smear, smear Barack Obama into a narrow defeat all in the course of a single day before the election? Not a bit.
[Rove, Rove, Rove your vote
When you're on the screen
Narrowly, narrowly, narrowly, narrowly
Swipe it by machine!]
We wonder why that power to destroy cannot be put in the service of building the country and working towards economic and social justice.
[If only they'd use their power for good!]
Thank you very much Tina Fey, but darling that you are, you are preaching to the converted. The real Sarah Palin doesn't get it -- nor do her rabid followers. And we fear that they see the White House in the sights of their rifles.
[We can see Rushbo from our House!]
We need a twenty point Obama lead tomorrow for us nervous guys to sleep easy.
[Does Medicare cover Ambien?]
Having seen the devious ways the Republicans operate, we find it impossible to believe that they will not once again pull some Rovian trick. . . .
[Some PERFECT Rovian Trick!]
Our mutual friend and fellow classmate Bob, a fine landscape and city scene painter, just died of melanoma in Maine. Among his last acts was sending in an absentee ballot for Obama. . . .
[Hey, as a Democrat, he may get to vote AGAIN!]
No, forget the crackup, I won't go to France or to pieces if McCain/Palin is elected. I will go . . .
[. . . feed my cat, who's probably starving by now. . . . OK, Shermy, now let's hear from your fellow HUffies . . .]
My brother told me that he actually might move to France if Obama loses.
[Is that you, Stephen Baldwin?]
We old farts just aren't as resilient as we once were.
[Back in the Farter Administration.]
The forces of light are staging a comeback.
[Obamassiah as Light-Worker.]
I clean the health food store out of their anti stress supplements. . . .
[Try the bong shop.]
I will be weeping on November 5. . . .
[Democrat Voting Day, AKA Guy Faux Election Day.]
I'm visualizing myself dressed in red white and blue on that day though, to celebrate Obama's win! I will be laughing crying. . . .
[Freudenschade, baby!]
It must be that 60's idealism. Its like a virus: just flares up once in awhile. . . .
[I think it's the herpes.]
If Obama loses this election, it will be because of massive fraud. Therefore, the country will be up in arms and heading for Washington.
[The Million Moonbat March! Sherman's March to DC!]
I wouldn't want to be riding around with a McCain Palin sticker on my car after Nov 5th if this fraud occurs, I wouldn't be safe.
[Days of Rage! Is that you, Bill Ayers?]
I will no longer accept stolen elections. LOCKED AND LOADED!
[Just go with the "loaded."]
This almost-senior woman is nervous, too. . . . I voted early. I spent about 7 minutes on the oval next to Obama-Biden to be absolutely sure that I had filled it in completely and stayed within the lines. Before I did that, I read the instructions 4 times, checked three times to be sure the ball point pen was a black ink pen, and lined the table with paper so as not to get last night's dinner on the ballot. When I was done with the ballot, I checked it three times. I hand carried it to the county clerk's where 3 officials were handling early voting, turned it in, hung around to see where the clerk put it, and then paced around a little bit in the lobby before deciding it was probably okay to leave my ballot in their hands.
[OCD much? You still probably ended up voting for Buchanan.]
At least I know my vote will be counted. Well, I am pretty sure. . .
[Heh heh heh. . . .]
I'm leaning Italian in a hurry.
[Ciao! Arrividerci!]
I share your fear of what the dark Rovian forces might be willing to do. . . .
[Fear the Rove.]
The corporate media has found a cash cow by framing this election as a "horse race". . . .
[Congratulations! You win the Mixed Metaphor of the Day Award!]
Let's just hope that we - as Americans, don't rest on our laurel and . . .
[Hardy.]
Hurry Nov. 4th, so that we can return to our regular routines!
[Our regular routine of doing what we're doing now: Whining on the Internet.]
This is why everybody should vote. The turnout should be 100%. . . .
[130% in some precincts.]
until the election is called Nov. 4th, I will be white knuckling it.
[Typical white knucklehead.]
I can't vote but I can say to all my fellow bloggers, I am chuffed by your passion. . . .
["Chuffed" gives you away. And so DUFU News is now projecting that Barack Obama will CARRY Great Britain!]
I too, cannot function normally anymore. . . . I really am not well.
[Situation Normal: All Functioned Up.]
The bathroom. That's the place where Johnny Ray's career crashed upon takeoff.
“A beeline to get online before feline or caffeine-mainline”.
Heh. Nice visual.
Regardless of who is in power, I'll still have my wife, my kids, my friends, my family, and my health. And, it's pretty darn likely that I'll have my job, or at least a solid source of income, a good place to live, plenty to eat, and something respectable to wear.
They'll be tossing snowballs in hell before I need to take anti-depressants because of the political climate.
My washer, my catz, and my flush toilets. Life is good.
Now my County Commissioners, corrupt b*stards all, could mess up the sewer service. That would be DOOM.
[...And so DUFU News is now projecting that Barack Obama will CARRY Great Britain!]
...and France!
I have learned to never try to eat or drink anything while reading the DUFUs, to prevent major “spewage”.
thanks for taking the time to compile this...and venturing over there bravely...how do you remove stench from your clothing when you return?
Exactly...I will be disappointed if 0 wins, but it won't control my life. I almost pity the moonbats for having lives so shallow, their happiness is tied to which slob is POTUS or which party of critters controls congress.
I have to admit, besides Sarah for VP, and 0 being a Marxist, one of the reasons I'm voting for McCain is to enjoy the Left’s misery if 0 loses.
I forget, is that borderline Kewpie Doll or LFT?
Ummm...seems like the DUmmies have just admitted to fraud here. Doesn't a person have to be alive on election day to have their absentee ballot count?
Never mind...these are DEM's after all.
LOL! This is perfect! PJ really should consider doing stand up.
You've got plenty of kids - send them out to dig a couple of privies.
OOPS!, You too Charles!
Ahem. . . .
PJ doesn't do ALL the DUFUs, you know.
They're not blind, just projecting. They do it so they assume Repubs do it. To them its as important who wins/loses the fraud contest as it is who wins/loses the election...
Thanx!
'Tis far more important to keep our eye on the ball. It's fine to be politically active, but not at the expense of what's truly important - our lives. 20 years from now, your kids won't remember (or care....) who their State Representative was, or who hosted what fundraiser for which candidate, but they *will* remember who was home for supper consistently at night.
Just Sayin'. Everyone needs a dose of sanity every now and again.
Not allowed in the town limits; we’d have to move to an unincorporated area. Which brings up one reason my State Representative is so important that I’ll be working the polls for him several more early voting days plus Nov. 4: He’s opposed to involuntary annexation of unincorporated areas of the county, and his opponent is all for it.
They realy are losing it...ha ha ha
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.