Certainly "it" is not about me per se. He is all in all and the most encompassing "all" we can conceive of.
Yet, the paradox is HE chose to die for me. . . and as the old saying goes--would have were I the only one. . . . and HE would leave the 90 & 9 to go searching for me.
HE has been the one to define, set up, facilitate, woo, etc. etc. a dialogue, a relationship with me. I'm not about to tarnish that by even pretending HE's a disingenuous trickster only pretending to have a meaningful dialogue, dance, RELATIONSHIP with me.
The relationship I see between Him and Moses, Him and John The Beloved and others is exceedingly congruent with what I've learned about relationships. Certainly HE knows how to have the paragon relationship.
You can define and construe the life right out of such a relationship potential if you wish. You can spread sterility far and wide in your brand of theology. But I prefer to avoid that path. It smacks more to me of the pharisees and sadusees than I shrudder to think about.
You tarnish it when you say your will is stronger than His grace
I am sorry you think that a right relationship between the King of Kings and the LORD of LORDS with you is for you to be in control of the 'relationship'
Luk 5:8 When Simon Peter saw [it], he fell down at Jesus' knees, saying, Depart from me; for I am a sinful man, O Lord.
THAT is the correct attitude...not "let me tell you what I think God"....
Only one can be Lord..eithor Him or you