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Thanks Sink.

Don't be disingenuous...You know what I mean by "liberal."

I'm using it in the Catholic sense that liberal = heterodox.

What I think Father is saying is that in the orthodox way, Jesus Christ is at the center, and this is the way in an orthodox marriage, difficult as that may be: Jesus Christ is at the center.

If you want control over your marriage (and we moderns have wanted it, myself included) you distance yourself from Christ and put you and your spouse at the center, and for the best of reasons. But that placement of self at the center causes a whole host of problems and a distancing of the self and the marriage and interdependency of the marriage, from Christ--this has to happen because it is now about you. It is the will in opposition to the intellect which ultimately knows Christ must be at the center of all (the Catholic Intellect, I mean). We must bend our will and form our intellect to put Christ at the center of all things, most especially the marriage.

In the Latin mass this is a foregone conclusion (the centrality of Christ). V's wife.