Are any other Catholics creeped out by hand-holding during the Lord's Prayer-Vanity Post

lanceboyle | 13 June 2002 | lanceboyle

[lanceboyle]

This is just a concern of a cradle Catholic. I've never been abused, God bless the priests who were in our parish while I was growing up. I accepted without question the changes that took place in our church, but as a child in the seventies, the iconoclasm, the felt banners, and guitar Masses didn't make much of a difference to me. But recently, this whole thing of hand-holding during the Our Father has been rather disturbing. I'm just not the touchy-feely type, and it's getting even wierder. There have even been people making Shirley Maclaine type gestures during Mass. Call me a dinosaur, but even the hymns don't have the same punch anymore. We used to sing great songs like "Holy God We Praise Thy Name." Now the music is banal at best, probably written by a member of the lavender mafia. Unless you go to a Hispanic parish, where you're treated to Mariachi music (with which I personally have no problem, but does it belong in Mass?) Am I just getting old, or do we need to bring the Church back to the Traditional Mass. Besides, the hand-holding is just plain gay.

[kellynla]

This might help you. www.latinmass.org There is a listing of Catholic Churches which celebrate Mass in Latin.

[Texas_Jarhead]

I'm not Catholic although some in my family are. Why does holding hands present a problem? In church we hold hands and pray or sing. At all family gatherings we all hold hands when we say grace. We call it Christian fellowship. I admit, as an adult it might take some getting use to but why the insecurity? Especially in God's house with brothers and sisters of the faith. I'm just curious. Is there some taboo against holding hands that I am not aware of? THanks in advance.

[Redbob]

"... as a child in the seventies, the iconoclasm, the felt banners, and guitar Masses didn't make much of a difference to me."

As a child of the '50's and '60's, the guitar masses and the childish banners and flags that looked as if they were made in Miss Peach's kindergarten class annoyed me no end;
when I visit the in-laws and attend Catholic church with them, I find things haven't changed a bit - I still feel as if I've somehow wandered into some '60's hippie love-in, and I can't wait to get out.

Mass at my Episcopal church is identical to the Catholic masses I was brought up with, except for the lack of Latin (why did we use Latin, anyway?) and the fact our priest has a wife and kids!

[Dick Vomer]

Ok.... settle down everybody....

I'm a Roman Catholic. I lost my way. I've now come to the realization that I'm not worthy of anything and until I realized that without God in my life it was all meaningless.
Now my path to the Lord took an off-ramp and some rough off road routes. So whether I hold hands (I do sometimes), sing out loud (sometimes to the horror of the people nearby) or just stand there with head bowed in humble thanks for all the Lord's Blessing. We are all united in our love of the Lord.... the rest of you

..... go to hell... hahahahaha . I'm just kiddin....

[Crowcreek]

Years ago I used to try to pass myself off as a Catholic when I'd go to the in-law's church.

The handshake always took me by surprise !

[Miss Marple]

Well, not everyone is comfortable having physical contact with people one is not familiar with. I find it distracting. Perhaps if you grew up in that tradition, it is not distracting to you.

My church only recently started doing this. I don't like it. It doesn't mean I don't think of people as my brothers and sisters in Christ; I just don't feel the handholding is necessary or helpful.

[demsux]

Yep, I hear ya. We hang out with another Catholic couple and the husband makes us hold hands during prayers before dinner.

At first I was uncomfortable with it...now I just look for an attractive female to sit on the other side of me from my wife.

Works at Mass too.

[Texas_Jarhead]

wow, I'm suprised at the angst voiced in this thread over holding hands. Especially considering it is a fellow Christian's hand and it's during the praising of God.

[TheErnFormerlyKnownAsBig]

We have small kids (a toddler and a baby) so we always take a short pew in front where they don't have a pew in front of us to kick and bother people.

This has two benefits. One, we don't tick off other parishoners and two, there ain't room for anyone else in our pew as it only seats 3-4 and thus we are holding hands with our kids. Problem solved.LOL

[Miss Marple]

Well, my opinion was asked for and I gave it. It is not angst, it is a peference.

I don't REFUSE to hold hands. But if I had my choice, I would prefer not to be distracted.

Now are you going to "tsk-tsk" at me because I don't like sacred dance as well?

[al-andalus]

Jesus washed people's feet but it seems most people on this thread have trouble holding someone's hand or shaking it during 'Pax Vobiscum'.

God forbid they might actually touch another human being. Very weird.

[Conservababe]

I am a fallen-away Catholic. I fell away before all the nonsense began, with the guitar mass and the hand shaking. As a southern woman, I will tell you, that I shake hands with no one, as I was never instructed that it was mannerly to do so, as a lady. I nod and say the appropiate words when introduced or greeted. Nothing annoys me more than to have a perfect stranger hold out his/her hand to me, as if I were a man. And it would be also true if I attended mass, still.

But I do remember my devout Catholic mother saying that she was annoyed by the hugging and hand shaking during mass in her later years, as she was in frail health, and did not want to be exposed to any more germs than was generated by the hacking and coughing of the congregation.

Besides, I think it is a silly gesture.

[Miss Marple]

No problem shaking hands. Please read the thread...the poster doesn't like to hold hands when praying, and it is something new in the Mass.

Why, may I ask, are a few people deciding that if you don't like to hold hands you are full of "angst" or a faulty Christian?

One could ask why are you so convinced that the non-hand holders are wrong?

[lanceboyle]

Bingo. The focus during Mass should be on God. As for loving one's neighbor, isn't that what all the ancillary ministries of the parish are for. I don't need gestures to tell others that my fellow parishoners and other human beings are important. I don't consider myself the best Christian or Catholic in the world. Just a sinner who keeps on trying. Anyhow, I'm going to sign off for the night, and ask that anyone who's the prayin type in this thread say one for my Dad. Thanks in advance.

[inkling]

I'm a non-Catholic who recently attended a Catholic funeral and I had two questions. (Please take no offense, I'm just unfamiliar with the practices):

1. Speaking of "Shirley MacLaine hand movements," the priest and several of the parishioners would do this odd deal with their hands. They had their palms up and outstretched, then they moved their hands around in circles while saying "Hallelujah." A Catholic woman I attended with leaned over and said, "I hate this weird hand thing. It's so gay." What is that and is it a new deal?

2. Several people in front of me were wearing these brown cloth things over their chests and backs. Sort of like two-way bibs with markings on them. Some had "IHS" and others had small crosses. One lady would turn the garment around at various points in the service so that different sides would face forward. These people seemed to be long-time church attendees and very committed. What are these deals?

Just two innocent questions from a non-denominational Christian :-) Thanks!

[Theresa]

What is THE POINT of holding hands? I refuse to do it. A firm, brief handshake is one thing. But the prolonged holding of the hand of a person other than my husband's is too intimate of a gesture for me and I am sure many others. Yes we are all Christians but why does that mean we have to LOVE holding hands with each other?

When I first went back to the church that was my first question in the Re-membering meeting. When did we start holding hands? I was told that we do it because it is the Our Father and we hold hands to demonstrate that we are childen of the same Father. Back then I did not know what to make of it. But the way I am now I would have asked the lady if she made that explaination up IN HER HEAD because it sure is not in the missal!

[Unam Sanctam]

I'm not creeped out, but I loathe this practice. I feel it an imposition of enforced intimacy. It is also exclusive, since the non-touchy feely types are either made to feel uncomfortable by holding hands, or look like unsociable jerks if they don't. And don't tell me that it is uncharitable not to hold hands. There are lots of ways of showing charity, and why is this particular public way the method enforced?

[lanceboyle]

OK, after this post I'll sign off (The homepage was right about the FreeRepublic Website being addicting). I have no idea about the circular hand movements. I'm assuming its some charismatic wierdness. The pieces of cloth you mentioned are probably scapulars. To openly flaunt them in front of everyone reminds me of the widening of phylacteries which was a practice of the first century pharisees. The scapular is a devotion to the Blessed Virgin Mary. Nothing wrong with that particular devotion although some may disagree. Anyhow, I hope I gave some answer to your questions.