Agreed.
I believe there is a big difference between the minister victimized by divorce whose wife left him even though he was willing to work it out and the minister who is 'victimized' by divorce who leaves his wife and kids so he can carry on with his secretary.
Agreed. We have a similar situation in our church now with our minister of music. No affair, just a growing apart. She walked out on him and moved to another state. The kids, one just out of college the other a college junior, stayed with dad.
Several years ago we had almost the same thing happen to friends of ours. We attended an interdenominational church affiliated with the Mennonites (but we're not Mennonite). A (married) couple was studying and working together to be ministers. She decided she was a lesbian, walked out on him and filed for divorce. When he started dating another friend (also Mennonite), it was a major scandal in their church community. There was no hope that the first marriage could be saved, but they couldn't accept his getting married again. When they eventually did get married, her parents did not attend the wedding. They came around later as the grandkids came on the scene.